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An escaped convict broke into a house and tied up a young couple who had been sleeping in the bedroom. As soon as he had a chance, the husband turned to his voluptuous young wife, bound-up on the bed in a skimpy nightgown, and whispered, "Honey, this guy hasn't seen a woman in years. Just cooperate with anything he wants. If he wants to have sex with you, just go along with it and pretend you like it. Our lives depend on it!"
"Dear," the wife hissed, spitting out her gag, "I'm so relieved you feel that way, because he just told me he thinks you have a nice, tight butt!
I was a nerd in high school. Still am.
There was a cute little red-headed girl.
George was a horny SOB with a different ho' every night of the week.
I really had nice and kind thoughts about the suitability of the red-headed girl to be a candidate for matrimony and child-rearing.
Red hair, blue eyes, freckles, big smile.
Anyway, one day during school while all the classes were in session George and I were going together from point A to point B for some forgotten reason. The redhead was walking in the opposite direction collecting attendance sheets from each class. As we passed one another, George stage-whispered "Nice butt."
I was aghast as the crudity of this and turned to the nice little red-headed girl to apologize for this uncouth remark. She had the biggest smile I'd ever seen on her.
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