General's dog

[okie]

A General retired after 35 years and realized a life-long dream of
buying a bird-hunting estate in South Dakota. He invited an old
friend to visit for a week of pheasant shooting. The friend was in
awe of the General's new bird dog, "Sarge".

The dog could point, flush and retrieve with the very best, and
the friend offered to buy the dog at any price. The General
declined, saying that Sarge was the very best bird dog he had ever
owned and that he wouldn't part with him at any price.

A year later the same friend returned for another week of hunting
and was surprised to find the General breaking in a new dog. "What
happened to ole "Sarge?" he asked.

"Had to shoot him," grumbled the General. "A friend came to hunt
with me and couldn't remember the dog's name. He kept calling him
Colonel. After that, all he would do was sit on his ass and bark."

[Rebeldon]

One lazy summer day in rural Mississippi, two old men were sitting on rocking chairs the front porch of their house, along with an ole hound dog laying down in front of them. One of the old men said, "My dog Jeb heah is the best bawd dog in all of Miss'ippi."

"Git out!" said the other man. Then along come a boy walking down the dirt road in front of a house towing a stick and the dog jumped up and ran out into the front yard and pointed straight at the boy.

"See the'a?" the pround owner of the dog said.

"That's a boy, not a dog!" his friend mused.

So the dog's owner got up and walked to the road to intercept the boy. "You got a bawd in yaw hand?" he asked the boy.

"No, Sah!" the boy replied.

"You got one in yaw pocket?" he asked.

"No, Sah", he said again.

"Well let me tell you somethin', young man!" he said. "This heah is the best bawd dog in all of Miss'ippi, and if he says you got somethin' to do with bawds, you got somethin to do with bawds. Have you been around any bawds at all today? Because he must smell 'em on you."

"No, Sah", he repeated, "I haven't."

Believing the boy was lying, he said, "What's yaw name, boy?"

"Bob", he replied. "Bob White."