After 14 years... [Archive] - Glock Talk

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CAcop
12-14-2011, 22:00
I finally took a call with someone wearing tinfoil on their head.

You hear about it.

You joke about it.

But one day there it is.

It took everything I had not to laugh out loud.

G27Chief
12-14-2011, 22:03
Oh man, were there little green men messing with his atmospheric carborator?

Newcop761
12-14-2011, 22:03
What exactly was this call about?

:tinfoil:

ateamer
12-14-2011, 22:06
Was he part of the entourage following the fat bathrobe wearing homeless activist who lives on a trust fund and owns a home in one of the more expensive areas of the county?

CAcop
12-14-2011, 22:31
I actually had to deal with him twice in two days. First he was being a dick to his mom. He is in his 20s. Then today he was putting his pot plants out in the sun and smoking weed. In the middle of an apartment complex. He keeps his hoodie on but you can see it peeking out from underneath and when you ask him about it he tells you it helps his electrical conductivity.

Not crazy enough for the rubber room and he has his weed card. I have no idea why a doc would think it is a good idea for a bipolar to self medicate with weed. This will not end well.

blueberry1177
12-14-2011, 23:03
When the time comes, tell him the antennas on your car are for the force field to protect anyone who is inside the car from voices.

Works everytime!

PinkoCommie
12-14-2011, 23:11
Did he have a microchip in his tooth that transmits his thoughts to aliens? Because if he did, I have his long-lost sister hanging around my jurisdiction.

Nuttier than a fruitcake.

Ajon412
12-14-2011, 23:51
When the time comes, tell him the antennas on your car are for the force field to protect anyone who is inside the car from voices.

Works everytime!

I like this.....I'm gonna give it a try.......:wavey:

fla2760
12-15-2011, 00:34
About a year before I retired I was doing a "park and walk" with a rookie along a street that has businesses on one side and the PJs on the other. This guy in his late 30's approaches us and starts to tell us how he loves the police and likes to see us. We are talking about 5 minutes about sports and such and he pauses and says he is carrying a pack of cigarettes in his shirt pocket and the cigs were talking to him telling him to kill his family with a machete. The rooks eyeballs almost pop out of their sockets. I ask him if he did it already and he says maybe he can't remember! I pat him down and tell him he will be more comfortable in the the back of our car when we check on them. We get another sector to go to the apartment for a welfare check. They are ok, and the mother says he has been having this problem with the cigs talking to him so he switched brands an it did not help! The mother asks if the pesticides they spray on the tobacco plants can cause this, HELLO your son is an EDP anyway he was admitted for a psych evaluation. One of the few people that was pleasant to us in that area was a whacko.:whistling:

COLOSHOOTR
12-15-2011, 01:21
I actually had to deal with him twice in two days. First he was being a dick to his mom. He is in his 20s. Then today he was putting his pot plants out in the sun and smoking weed. In the middle of an apartment complex. He keeps his hoodie on but you can see it peeking out from underneath and when you ask him about it he tells you it helps his electrical conductivity..

:rofl: Thats why this job is so much fun.... You really can't make this stuff up! I had a guy wearing a metal mixing bowl over his head once.... The sad thing is he had a legit reason for it. He was actually protecting his head from the hard objects his crack head girlfriend was throwing at him / hitting him with. Yet to come across a tinfoil crazy yet....

Cochese
12-15-2011, 01:59
Along the same lines...

I heard all about the "these aren't my pants" line and figured I would hear it EVENTUALLY, but I got it in TX in phase II of FTO. :rofl:

"These ain't mah pants. They mah patnuhs. He stay ovahdeah!"

:rofl:

COLOSHOOTR
12-15-2011, 02:29
I've gotten the these are not my pants or it's not my coat line several times.... Somehow it seems like everyone that has a rock in their pockets ends up with someone elses pants on. I guess stange things happen at crack houses.... They have to practice for prison some how.

BamaTrooper
12-15-2011, 07:42
Along the same lines...

I heard all about the "these aren't my pants" line and figured I would hear it EVENTUALLY, but I got it in TX in phase II of FTO. :rofl:

"These ain't mah pants. They mah patnuhs. He stay ovahdeah!"

:rofl:

I once had a "But these aren't my socks; I borrowed them" when we found a bag of crack in a guys sock.:faint:

lwt210
12-15-2011, 07:56
I had one not too long ago where a petite, older Asian woman had tin foiled most of a wall in her apartment.

The neighbors were shooting "beams" through the wall and invading her brain, or something to that effect.

Which was all good with me until I saw she had duct taped and plastic wrapped all of the smoke detectors and HVAC vents. Had she started a fire, her neighbors would be at the mercy of whatever firewalls the contractor had installed. IIRC, there were even sprinkler system outlets/nozzles that she had covered up.

So I had to let the complex's manager know. Not sure what ever became of it but I haven't had a call back there since. Maybe off to the funny farm.

scottydl
12-15-2011, 09:05
What's scary is that any one of us is only a few misplaced neurons away from becoming one of those folks! But until then, we'll deal with them as best we can, and joke when appropriate.

acpd541
12-15-2011, 10:54
http://i333.photobucket.com/albums/m391/weirdone_1953/TinFoilHats.jpg

A6Gator
12-15-2011, 11:13
I have no idea why a doc would think it is a good idea for a bipolar to self medicate with weed.

Maybe he has "anxiety." Seems to be the standard answer.:supergrin:

RussP
12-15-2011, 12:21
When the time comes, tell him the antennas on your car are for the force field to protect anyone who is inside the car from voices.

Works everytime!Damn, that's GOOD!

Newcop761
12-15-2011, 12:23
Maybe he has "anxiety." Seems to be the standard answer.:supergrin:

Or glaucoma... or a paper-cut. :upeyes:

steveksux
12-15-2011, 23:09
:rofl: Thats why this job is so much fun.... You really can't make this stuff up! I had a guy wearing a metal mixing bowl over his head once.... The sad thing is he had a legit reason for it. He was actually protecting his head from the hard objects his crack head girlfriend was throwing at him / hitting him with. That's why they call them "Crack Heads"... :whistling:

Randy

wjv
12-15-2011, 23:41
The tin foil was just to protect the couch from his Jheri curls. . . .

MarcDW
12-16-2011, 06:22
PICTURES? Please tell me you took some pictures??? :rofl:

bccop
12-16-2011, 22:35
I would frequently see a guy wearing a helmet wrapped in tinfoil.

RyanNREMTP
12-16-2011, 22:42
Once had a patient we were transporting in the ambulance that thought every vehicle that had it's headlights on were following him. This included the ones with daytime running lights. That was a long trip.

x_out86
12-17-2011, 01:04
One of our local fruitcakes does not wear it on his head. However, the ENTIRE inside of his house has it on all the walls and windows. And on the rare occasion that he does venture outside, he wears a tin foil breast plate (gladiator style) under his clothing to block out the bad vibes.

Another one of ours does not wear foil at all, but has called a number of times to complain about the squirrels in his yard looking at him funny, and he thinks they are up to something.

Hack
12-17-2011, 01:45
I once had a "But these aren't my socks; I borrowed them" when we found a bag of crack in a guys sock.:faint:

So his crack smelled like cheese ... eh wait.

seanmac45
12-17-2011, 08:04
Back in the early eighties I spent a month on restricted duty due to a leg injury so I spent a LOT of time on the TS. Wound up taking nightly calls from a guy named Steve. His problem was the CIA shooting beams into his apartment to control his mind.

Being the helpful community policing type of guy that I was it was my duty to introduce him to the more useful aspects of tin foil. I started with his windows. He had some problems in later calls with getting the suff to cooperate on vertical surfaces. Introduced him to double sided tape. Eventually I healed and went back to patrol.

Do you see it coming? Sure as **** one night we get an EDP run in a nice apartment building on the east side of the command. Screaming to beat the band and destroying every stick of furniture in the joint. Partner and I knock and after a few attempts we hear a voice from the other side of the door. Knew it immediately from our numerous phone conversations. STEVE I yell, it's Sean! Door flies open and there in a diaper and tinfoil beanie is my phone buddy. You came to save me! He says. Walk into the apartment and beheld a vision that would have given the CEO of ALCOA a hard on. Every surface and very stick of furniture covered in foil.

Steve went to the rubber room and I couldn't buy a drink for a week. Instant legend status. Thanks Steve.

seanmac45
12-17-2011, 08:16
One night we grab a dealer after he fixes up two of my UC's. Post arrest search discloses thirty jumbos in the left front pocket of his jeans. These aren't my pants! That's not my stuff! He screams. We go back and forth for a little while with me letting him think he was on the verge of talking his way out of it. Until finally I asked him if he ever heard the phrase that possession was nine tenths of the law. Yeah! My little Einstein replies..okay says I since you have the crack and possession is nine tenths we are taking 90% of your ass to jail. I flicked open my knife and asked him which 10% he wanted to leave behind on the street.

Discussion over. Two of my Detectives almost had to go sick from laughing so hard at the look on the mutt's face.

Priceless

trdvet
12-17-2011, 08:29
Had a lady that would call in constantly about how her neighbors would open her garage door throughout the day, place listening devices under her carpet and sneak into her attic.

The problem was that she didn't even have a garage door, ripped up all her carpet and nailed the attic entry shut as to trap these mysterious people. She took her ex's floor mats from his car and put them under a rug in her house to preserve them as evidence. She was 10-96 X.

lawman800
12-17-2011, 10:51
Oh man... it's going to be hard to beat these stories... but I did have an interesting conversation with an EDP about how the world bank was taking over and they are stealing everyone's money via secret transactions that we don't even know about and I should be careful even going to the local bank to do anything... I guess this guy would know because he was a stinky homeless dude. Maybe he has firsthand knowledge as a victim?

I have not run into a tinfoil hat wearer yet but I have regular interactions with a local who thinks he is Michael Jackson. He walks around all day dancing on the streets. Not a care in the world. Must be nice.

3Speedyfish3
12-17-2011, 11:34
I once swept a lady's house for "bugs" with my speaker mic. I used the test button to make it beep appropriatelely. I'm not proud of it and think I made it harder for the next Copper. Okay, it was funny at the time.

Randall

lwt210
12-17-2011, 12:35
Partner and I knock and after a few attempts we hear a voice from the other side of the door. Knew it immediately from our numerous phone conversations. STEVE I yell, it's Sean! Door flies open and there in a diaper and tinfoil beanie is my phone buddy. You came to save me! He says. Walk into the apartment and beheld a vision that would have given the CEO of ALCOA a hard on. Every surface and very stick of furniture covered in foil.

Steve went to the rubber room and I couldn't buy a drink for a week. Instant legend status. Thanks Steve.

Owns me. :rofl:

PinkoCommie
12-17-2011, 13:24
Back in the early eighties...

You're my hero.

Morris
12-17-2011, 14:10
Walk into the apartment and beheld a vision that would have given the CEO of ALCOA a hard on. Every surface and very stick of furniture covered in foil.

:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

We have occasionals and we have regulars. It's the regulars that get old after awhile.

DonGlock26
12-17-2011, 16:14
I met an Egyptian god once with the appropiate make-up around the eyes. The whole house was covered with biblical text written on the walls in black marker. :shocked:

Yes, there were ALOT of drugs in the house.

_

lawman800
12-17-2011, 18:29
Alright, raise your hands, who has gone to a domestic and put the parties' hands on your badge and pronounced them divorced based on the authority vested in you as an officer of the state?

Morris
12-17-2011, 19:13
Had a werewolf go down with two taser applications . . .

50 Cent
12-17-2011, 19:27
He probably DID see a UFO - from the co-pilots seat.

blueberry1177
12-17-2011, 23:53
I like this.....I'm gonna give it a try.......:wavey:

I forgot to mention that to activate the force-field I first must hit the standby button twice on my lightpad/controller ;)

One of our guys actually did this to lure a crazed woman who was hearing voices and seeing aliens into his scout car to take her to the hospital.