JW1178
10-12-2012, 23:52
Why are some parents raising their kids to be brats? It seems there is this "let them be children and do as they please" mentality where the children are in charge, which results in a brat. It seems they expect to get what they want and will not take no for an answer. They know that if they scream loud enough, long enough, they will get what they want. So when someone finally draws the line, they get into more extreme measures to get what they want. These are not what I would consider happy children, they fuss all the time and when they get what they want, there is a very brief moment of satisfaction followed by them looking for something else they want. It seems they are always frustrated and that is because they are never satisfied. It seems they go from bursts of being happy, to bursts of anger or sadness very quickly. Kind of like they are bi-polar, or manic. They aren't, but they are behaving like this. I'm no Dr, but I do believe that some mental disorders are learned disorders. They learned to be that way and it's so embedded in their brains it's the only way they know.
Case in point: I know of a few like this, but I will give one example. My fiance's friend. Single mom, dad not around. Her little boy is 3, still in diapers, trip-trapping around with a passifier in his mouth all the time. What I mean by trip-trapping is the jagged shaky way toddlers who are just learning to walk. Needless to say, he is developmentally behind. He still can't speak in sentences. Very much speaks a baby language. We are over there having dinner. She makes him some mac and cheese because she knows he won't eat what we are having. He becomes very fussy because he wants a plate of what we are having. So she makes him a plate. He pokes at it but then refuses it, became rather angry that it wasn't what he wanted. She put the mac and cheese back in front of him and he freaked like she was trying to kill him. He wanted spegetti-oh's, so she makes if for him. He was delighted to get the speghetti-oh's but barely tasted it. He wants it on the coffee table, on the edge so he can play with his trucks and trains. When we move it from the edge, he became very upset by this. He wants it on the edge, where he can spill it. He then tried to throw it. He won't eat a meal. However, as the evening went by, he wanted to snack constantly. He wants crackers and treats for a constant diet. It's getting later in the evening and he is very tired, so he's even more fussy, but he wants to stay up, so he won't go to bed. It seems as though when he's happy, he's over-exuberantly happy, screaming and carrying on over what he likes, but otherwise, he's alway whining, fussing, and throwing fits. It seems all his mother does is try to cottle him and make him happy. However, I wouldn't say he is a happy kid. He is a very frustrated child. Not very pleasant to be around. I would not go into public with them. Absolutely not.
I know of about three other children like this, single mom's raising a boy with no dad around. These children have no structure in their lives. No bedtimes, no meal times, no diet plan, just whatever, whenever they want.
Then on the other hand, I have a few friends where they are a couple. Their children eat what is put on the table in front of them. They are told no. They have a bed time. They are punished when they mis behave. I see a three year old that will walk up to you, shake your hand, and hold a conversation with you. A childish one, but a conversation. He only wears pull ups to bed. He is a very happy kid to say the least. Of course he whines and fusses sometimes but it's not very much, not a long time, and he knows better than to go to extremes. This child, and a few other children like him, have a lot of structure in their lives. Needless to say, they are much further ahead in developement.
I am sure as time goes by, these reflections will carry on to adult hood. The bratty kid will probably end up at some future occupy movement upset because he thinks others should take care of him and angry because the world won't change for him. Probably will have mental disorders such as bi-polar or manic depressive that will make him unable to succeed. The other child will probably be a business man telling the bratty one to get off his property.
Case in point: I know of a few like this, but I will give one example. My fiance's friend. Single mom, dad not around. Her little boy is 3, still in diapers, trip-trapping around with a passifier in his mouth all the time. What I mean by trip-trapping is the jagged shaky way toddlers who are just learning to walk. Needless to say, he is developmentally behind. He still can't speak in sentences. Very much speaks a baby language. We are over there having dinner. She makes him some mac and cheese because she knows he won't eat what we are having. He becomes very fussy because he wants a plate of what we are having. So she makes him a plate. He pokes at it but then refuses it, became rather angry that it wasn't what he wanted. She put the mac and cheese back in front of him and he freaked like she was trying to kill him. He wanted spegetti-oh's, so she makes if for him. He was delighted to get the speghetti-oh's but barely tasted it. He wants it on the coffee table, on the edge so he can play with his trucks and trains. When we move it from the edge, he became very upset by this. He wants it on the edge, where he can spill it. He then tried to throw it. He won't eat a meal. However, as the evening went by, he wanted to snack constantly. He wants crackers and treats for a constant diet. It's getting later in the evening and he is very tired, so he's even more fussy, but he wants to stay up, so he won't go to bed. It seems as though when he's happy, he's over-exuberantly happy, screaming and carrying on over what he likes, but otherwise, he's alway whining, fussing, and throwing fits. It seems all his mother does is try to cottle him and make him happy. However, I wouldn't say he is a happy kid. He is a very frustrated child. Not very pleasant to be around. I would not go into public with them. Absolutely not.
I know of about three other children like this, single mom's raising a boy with no dad around. These children have no structure in their lives. No bedtimes, no meal times, no diet plan, just whatever, whenever they want.
Then on the other hand, I have a few friends where they are a couple. Their children eat what is put on the table in front of them. They are told no. They have a bed time. They are punished when they mis behave. I see a three year old that will walk up to you, shake your hand, and hold a conversation with you. A childish one, but a conversation. He only wears pull ups to bed. He is a very happy kid to say the least. Of course he whines and fusses sometimes but it's not very much, not a long time, and he knows better than to go to extremes. This child, and a few other children like him, have a lot of structure in their lives. Needless to say, they are much further ahead in developement.
I am sure as time goes by, these reflections will carry on to adult hood. The bratty kid will probably end up at some future occupy movement upset because he thinks others should take care of him and angry because the world won't change for him. Probably will have mental disorders such as bi-polar or manic depressive that will make him unable to succeed. The other child will probably be a business man telling the bratty one to get off his property.