Why Get Married? [Archive] - Glock Talk

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Bensmiata
10-23-2012, 11:35
I see almost no advantage to getting married other than it gives you and your spouse the satisfaction of saying 'this is my husband/wife'. Other than that there are not any significant benefits to the proposition and so many ways it can go wrong. I know too many people who are: unhappily married, divorced, paying alimony, paying child support, been cheated on, cheat, been married 2/3/4 times (do you learn??) and the list goes on. Honestly, what sense does it make financially or otherwise?

wjv
10-23-2012, 11:42
So you can have a valid excuse for not having any sex. . . .

GlockinNJ
10-23-2012, 11:43
Why get married? Just like having kids, it's a personal decision that should not be made in the heat of passion.

It's not for everyone.

Bensmiata
10-23-2012, 11:43
So you can have a valid excuse for not having any sex. . . .

//End Thread// :rofl:

skinny99
10-23-2012, 11:47
I see no reason. There are very few things that marriage brings that cannot happen without marriage. None that are important to me.

bmoore
10-23-2012, 11:50
I know too many people who are: unhappily married, divorced, paying alimony, paying child support, been cheated on, cheat, been married 2/3/4 times (do you learn??) and the list goes on. Honestly, what sense does it make financially or otherwise?

Stop hanging out with losers. Parents have been married 35 years, grandparents over 50 years. Happy people, dont cheat on one anoter, don't pay child support/almoney.........the list goes on.

skinny99
10-23-2012, 11:54
Stop hanging out with losers. Parents have been married 35 years, grandparents over 50 years. Happy people, dont cheat on one anoter, don't pay child support/almoney.........the list goes on.

Congrats! Sounds like you come from a great family. Do you think that the piece of paper that each of them signed made them anymore faithful or happy?

I think it boils down to who you are rather then what paper you sign. IMO

slick64
10-23-2012, 11:56
paying child support, been cheated on, cheat, (do you learn??) and the list goes on. Honestly, what sense does it make financially or otherwise?

The items above can happen married or not, btw.

Obviously, there are some tax benefits, and it shows a sense of commitment.

If its not a big deal or make sense to you, but if you met the woman of your dreams and she wanted to get married, you're saying you wouldn't?

itstime
10-23-2012, 12:13
The items above can happen married or not, btw.

Obviously, there are some tax benefits, and it shows a sense of commitment.

If its not a big deal or make sense to you, but if you met the woman of your dreams and she wanted to get married, you're saying you wouldn't?

I agree with this. It probably has to due more with the woman. I have no problems commiting on paper that I am with her thin and thick.

Ironbar
10-23-2012, 12:24
Honestly, what sense does it make financially or otherwise?

I will say to you the same thing I say to anyone else who asks that question:

If you have to ask, then you'll never know.

Brucev
10-23-2012, 12:26
Stop hanging out with losers. Parents have been married 35 years, grandparents over 50 years. Happy people, dont cheat on one anoter, don't pay child support/almoney.........the list goes on.

You got it exactly right! Been married 33 years. Wonderful life together. A real joy!

Sharkey
10-23-2012, 12:33
Congrats! Sounds like you come from a great family. Do you think that the piece of paper that each of them signed made them anymore faithful or happy?

I think it boils down to who you are rather then what paper you sign. IMO

You are precisely correct. The certificate and license has NOTHING to do with it. It does boil down to who you are. Heathens live together in sin and Christians make a covenant with and before God. There is also the example of marriage being used to define our relationship with the Lord.

Hence the reason some are upset with two people of the same sex being "married". The problem with a lot of marriages today are we don't see it as a covenant as much as a contract and they are not the same. We've been breaking contracts for a long time now.

If I wasn't a Christian, I'd probably just live with someone too.

IndyGunFreak
10-23-2012, 12:51
I will say to you the same thing I say to anyone else who asks that question:

If you have to ask, then you'll never know.

Yup.

I couldn't imagine my life w/o my wife(just over 5yrs).

IGF

PPinesRon
10-23-2012, 13:22
I will say to you the same thing I say to anyone else who asks that question:

If you have to ask, then you'll never know.


So true. Been married 30 years and I'd do it again. Best thing that ever happened to me.

Gareth68
10-23-2012, 13:24
Tax breaks and other social welfare.

tantrix
10-23-2012, 13:25
Congrats! Sounds like you come from a great family. Do you think that the piece of paper that each of them signed made them anymore faithful or happy?

I think it boils down to who you are rather then what paper you sign. IMO

Exactly right. You're going to either bust up or stay together, married or not. Marriage doesn't change the final outcome.

Phaze5ive
10-23-2012, 13:30
Exactly right. You're going to either bust up or stay together, married or not. Marriage doesn't change the final outcome.

But I don't lose half my **** when I drop the GF :tongueout:

sputnik767
10-23-2012, 13:30
Why own a car when you can just ride the bus and not have to worry about gas, insurance, licensing, taxes, fees, etc? And depending on where you live, that may be a valid point. But taking the bus is certainly not for everyone, which is exactly the point. You may have known your fair share of people in bad marriages that ended in divorce, infidelity, etc, but you probably also know a fair share of people who are perfectly happy being married to their one wife or husband of x number of years, and can't imagine it being any other way. If it's not for you then it's not for you, and lots of women (and men) are not worth being married to. But that doesn't mean that it doesn't make sense.

Dragoon189
10-23-2012, 13:35
basically right, marriage is between the couple for the sake of reproduction and some legal issues. The state has no business in it only you and your spouse.

roger123
10-23-2012, 13:35
Get paid a lot more if you're in the military and get off base housing vice having to live on the ship!

Been married for 25 years and am very happy.

GSSF17
10-23-2012, 13:39
Tax breaks and other social welfare.

Sure..........:rofl:

Angry Fist
10-23-2012, 13:40
Marraige is punishment for shoplifting in some countries.

Glock20 10mm
10-23-2012, 13:47
The "wife" and I have agreed not to get married in the legal sense, but we recognize each other as husband and wife. It makes things much easier. Sure there are tax incentives (although I am sure those will go away soon). Otherwise there is no real incentive that I can see.

9jeeps
10-23-2012, 13:56
The difference is this. Married.... It's all about you. Unmarried.... It's all about me!

Easterbrook
10-23-2012, 13:58
I see almost no advantage to getting married other than it gives you and your spouse the satisfaction of saying 'this is my husband/wife'. Other than that there are not any significant benefits to the proposition and so many ways it can go wrong. I know too many people who are: unhappily married, divorced, paying alimony, paying child support, been cheated on, cheat, been married 2/3/4 times (do you learn??) and the list goes on. Honestly, what sense does it make financially or otherwise?

The already mentions tax benefits. If you are both high income, however, it actually hurts you and you may pay more in federal income taxes than if you stayed single.

Child support is irrelevant to your question, as you are responsible for any child you produce whether or not you are married. Plenty of never-been-married men out there paying child support.

In many states the property of married couples will pass to the other spouse automatically upon death, free from the claims of the deceased's creditors (unless they've attached a lien), so there is that.









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tuica
10-23-2012, 13:58
I believe that it greatly adds to the stability of the nation. Yes, yes, I know there are exceptions. Cheers.

AlexHassin
10-23-2012, 14:02
a few tax and legal things. i am not sold on it either but if you want to more power to you.

on a funny note, my parents do not think i should get married because my girlfriend and i do not plan on ever having children ever.

SC Tiger
10-23-2012, 14:11
So you can have a valid excuse for not having any sex. . . .

I thought that was kids:rofl::rofl::rofl:

Why get married? Just like having kids, it's a personal decision that should not be made in the heat of passion.

It's not for everyone.

This is truth

I will say to you the same thing I say to anyone else who asks that question:

If you have to ask, then you'll never know.

This is the answer.

I will add that I do not agree with people having kids and not being married. If you aren't willing to commit to each other then how can you be committed to your child?

skinny99
10-23-2012, 14:17
You are precisely correct. The certificate and license has NOTHING to do with it. It does boil down to who you are. Heathens live together in sin and Christians make a covenant with and before God. There is also the example of marriage being used to define our relationship with the Lord.

Hence the reason some are upset with two people of the same sex being "married". The problem with a lot of marriages today are we don't see it as a covenant as much as a contract and they are not the same. We've been breaking contracts for a long time now.

If I wasn't a Christian, I'd probably just live with someone too.

The only problem I have with what your saying is that you believe in a Christian rule book and I don't. I only follow two rules. The Golden rule "One should treat others as one would like others to treat oneself" and one I came up with on my own. "Do what you know in your heart is correct for you" I believe if you follow these two rules you will be living correctly. This is how I fee and believe and is the only thing that matters. Because that is what religion is, how you believe.

I also believe that my relationship with God is mine and mine alone.

amazon
10-23-2012, 14:21
tax breaks? hahahaha

skinny99
10-23-2012, 14:24
tax breaks? hahahaha

People keep posting that. I sat with my accountant last year. We figured our taxes married and unmarried and came out ahead unmarried. It also made for a better return for my "wife" to claim our little girl then me.

UtahGlocker
10-23-2012, 14:31
Marriage means different things to different people. Under the law it is to establish a next of kin relationship which provides a clear beneficiary for inheritance, medical decisions, social security benefits, etc. There are more than 1,000 federal benefits for married people. Beyond legalities it is a demonstration of commitment and love to each other for mutual benefit. It is this commitment to each other that makes it so valuable. The commitment helps you to get through tough times and provides more stability for children. For some this commitment is before God and family in a church, for others it is only before a Justice of the Peace.

Obi Wan
10-23-2012, 14:53
Marriage licenses/certificates should come with a 5-7 year expiration/renewal clause. If you choose to not refile, the 'divorce' is automatic with a pre-defined split of assets, period.

Mrs.Cicero
10-23-2012, 15:16
Marriage means different things to different people. Under the law it is to establish a next of kin relationship which provides a clear beneficiary for inheritance, medical decisions, social security benefits, etc. There are more than 1,000 federal benefits for married people. Beyond legalities it is a demonstration of commitment and love to each other for mutual benefit. It is this commitment to each other that makes it so valuable. The commitment helps you to get through tough times and provides more stability for children. For some this commitment is before God and family in a church, for others it is only before a Justice of the Peace.

This. And if I were just shacked up, I'd personally have less incentive to fix the relationship when it gets out of whack (which all relationships do, at times). It would be easier to just pack my bags and go. Being married means I have to do everything in my power to make it work, even when I don't want to, because just walking out is no longer an option. It increases my children's chances of growing up in the type of home God intended for them. YMMV.

jakebrake
10-23-2012, 15:20
it's about sharing your life with someone that you love more than you.

if you really need to ask, you shouldn't get married.

JW1178
10-23-2012, 15:38
Love is grand, divorce is 20 grand.

It depends on your situation. For some people, marriage might have some real benifits. The only real advantage would be if you and your wife were in the child rearing business where one works and the other stays at home and raises the children. That has a lot of tax and insurance benifits. If both are working and one is making a lot less than the other, it has benifits.

I would love to call my fiance my wife. However, when we put away the emotions and really studied it, we found that getting legally married would not be in our best financial interest. We are planning on a commitment ceremony soon, and might even refer to each other as our spouse, but legally we won't be. Sorry if that offends some of you married people, but we are going to have our cake and eat it too.

More people are starting to realize this, so marriage is on the decline. People are waiting to get married, which makes a lot of sense. Stats are that if you wait until 30, you are 5X as likely to succeed. I was head over heals in love with a girl who I "knew" was the one when I was 22 years old, and we almost tied the knot. She got cold feet and backed out, and hurt me bad. I am 33 years old now and if we had gotten married there is no doubt we would be divorced now. Maybe I should thank her, at least only my heart got broken.

It seems the only one's who want to get married these days are the gays and lesbians. What's funny is I have a lesbian friend who told me one day she does not want gay marriage because even though she would like that right, she doesn't want to get married and she knows it would come up if she could legally get married, so by it being illegal, it lets her say "of course I would marry you if this bigot state would let us" and ends it there... she's such a player. lol

JW1178
10-23-2012, 15:43
Marriage licenses/certificates should come with a 5-7 year expiration/renewal clause. If you choose to not refile, the 'divorce' is automatic with a pre-defined split of assets, period.

That is a great idea. Real convienint because where you get marriage licenses and your CCW permits are in the same office here in GA. :rofl: In all seriousness, that would solve a lot of headaches.

2 groups would oppose it, the Christian Evangelicals that don't understand the difference between church and state and the Lawyers that make their living of divorces.

PhotoFeller
10-23-2012, 15:50
I will add that I do not agree with people having kids and not being married. If you aren't willing to commit to each other then how can you be committed to your child?

I'm with Tiger on this one.

I don't pretend to be an expert in these matters, but I do have many, many years of experience with 'relationships'.

In my opinion, many single people equate good sex with love; this leads to marriages that crumble when the sex starts to loose it's luster. This shouldn't surprise anyone. Of all the marriages that fail today (~50% of all marriages), most are based on a state of arousal rather than true love; otherwise, many more would succeed.

To the hot blooded young studs and fillies out there I say live it up, live together, wear yourselves out. But by God, don't bring children into your passion-driven relationship. If you do, you are setting those kids up for heartbreak and disappointment. If you do, shame on you.

I've been married for 45 years and we raised two kids with love in a stable, happy home. My wife and I were a team before we became a family. She was my helpmate every step of the way, and vice versa. Our perspective every day is 'we', not 'me'.

shotgunred
10-23-2012, 15:58
If for no other reason you can put her on your medical insurance. Men tend to have better benefit packages and women have a lot more medical problems.

NeverMore1701
10-23-2012, 16:26
There should be no reason besides wanting to call the other person your husband/wife.

Then again I don't see a single reason the .gov should be involved in marriage in any way.

Buki192327
10-23-2012, 16:52
Marriage means different things to different people. Under the law it is to establish a next of kin relationship which provides a clear beneficiary for inheritance, medical decisions, social security benefits, etc. There are more than 1,000 federal benefits for married people. Beyond legalities it is a demonstration of commitment and love to each other for mutual benefit. It is this commitment to each other that makes it so valuable. The commitment helps you to get through tough times and provides more stability for children. For some this commitment is before God and family in a church, for others it is only before a Justice of the Peace.

This. And if I were just shacked up, I'd personally have less incentive to fix the relationship when it gets out of whack (which all relationships do, at times). It would be easier to just pack my bags and go. Being married means I have to do everything in my power to make it work, even when I don't want to, because just walking out is no longer an option. It increases my children's chances of growing up in the type of home God intended for them. YMMV.

it's about sharing your life with someone that you love more than you.

if you really need to ask, you shouldn't get married.

:agree:

ithaca_deerslayer
10-23-2012, 18:40
The "wife" and I have agreed not to get married in the legal sense, but we recognize each other as husband and wife. It makes things much easier. Sure there are tax incentives (although I am sure those will go away soon). Otherwise there is no real incentive that I can see.

If you are "married", then why not get married?

Is it because you want to keep an easy way to "divorce"?

Or is it some other reason that I am not thinking of?

I think the incentive is the commitment. Telling friends, neighbors, family, the church, and the government that you are committed to each other takes a certain amount of commitment :)

janice6
10-23-2012, 18:41
So you can have a valid excuse for not having any sex. . . .


This......With no legal recourse.

Seriously, the decision is only yours, no one elses.

MadMonkey
10-23-2012, 18:58
I'm not really interested in marriage. Blows my mom's mind :rofl:

Heck I've only had two dates in the last 6 years.

ray9898
10-23-2012, 19:00
So.....act married but make it so you can have an easy exit?

If you do enter a true long term commitment where you do things like buying a houses, vehicles and other assets you will end up connected anyway.

2afreedom
10-23-2012, 19:15
With the social stigma of living together out of wedlock basically non-existent, marriage is what it was in the beginning: a religious ritual. Unless you believe that a divinity wants you to be married, there's very little incentive to be married in America today.

I have no regrets about being married for going on 9 years. The biggest mistake people make with marriage is doing it for the wrong reasons: for the family, to please the girlfriend, for tax benefits, etc. If you have serious questions about doing it-just don't. You can always make the commitment later when you are ready

Glock20 10mm
10-23-2012, 19:21
I'm not really interested in marriage. Blows my mom's mind :rofl:

Heck I've only had two dates in the last 6 years.

What the hell...are you gay?































:rofl::wavey: Just messing with you!

ArtificialGrape
10-23-2012, 19:23
I suspect for most people financial reasons don't top the list. If you don't understand the reasons, then I would say marriage is not for you (at least not currently).

-ArtificialGrape <-- married to my high school sweetheart for 23 years

Gun Line
10-23-2012, 19:23
Not live in SIN

frank4570
10-23-2012, 19:32
I think pair bonding is normal desire for most humans, and particularly females. It's something that causes one to feel fulfilled.

jpa
10-23-2012, 19:42
I would love to have kids and I wouldn't be opposed to having a "wife" but I get scared every time I hear the horror stories from the guys I work with who have been married 3-4 times and pay all kinds of child support and their kids hate them and yadda yadda. That and some of the girls I've met lately have some serious snakes in the head....

ithaca_deerslayer
10-23-2012, 19:55
I would love to have kids and I wouldn't be opposed to having a "wife" but I get scared every time I hear the horror stories from the guys I work with who have been married 3-4 times and pay all kinds of child support and their kids hate them and yadda yadda. That and some of the girls I've met lately have some serious snakes in the head....

If you want it, do it.

Not easy, but has it's rewards. Just being married is a LOT easier than being married and raising a kid. Having a wife isn't as hard as having a kid :)

But you have to decide what you want to do in life. Find a like minded woman, and just do it.

Being scared is silly and not very productive if it keeps you from experiencing good things in life. Listening to negative people who've had bad experiences isn't always healthy. Go your own way.

JerryVO
10-23-2012, 19:56
Sharkey has is exactly right. Marriage is all about your faith and relationship with you, your spouse, and god. If you do not live by religious rules than most of the points raised here are right. There is no reason to get married. It would simply be a contractual construct and all of the rights that come with marriage can be accomplished through powers of attorney, advanced directives, wills, trusts, etc... if the religious angle is not for you that is fine and it would make sense that the concept of marriage would seem logical.


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TreverSlyFox
10-23-2012, 22:13
Was married for 39 years 1 month and 14 days, she passed on New Years day.

If you have to ask why get Married there is nothing I can say to explain it to you that would make any difference to your thinking.

Magnus2131
10-23-2012, 22:32
Was married for 39 years 1 month and 14 days, she passed on New Years day.

If you have to ask why get Married there is nothing I can say to explain it to you that would make any difference to your thinking.
Well said. Sorry for your loss.

tehan2
10-23-2012, 22:49
such jaded people here when marriage is discussed....remember that for every unhappy and cheating couple there's a happily married couple too. we just don't run around "bragging about how good it is"

I've been married 17+ years to my best friend. She's literally saved my life and I'm a better me because of her. WE are a team, and the team is stronger than either individual

in full disclosure, not every minute of everyday is cookies and ice cream...but there are significantly more great days than bad