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Turbodiesel
11-02-2012, 19:20
I have a question regarding my girlfriend. I am going to a police academy in a few short weeks, and my father is a retired Law Enforcement Officer himself. I realize there are evil people in this world and we must stand ready to defend ourselves if necessary. That being said, I live in a mostly rural area. As such, whenever I try to teach my girlfriend anything about self defense or firearms she rolls her eyes as if "nothing could ever happen to her, especially HERE!" No one she's ever known has had anything bad happen to them, so how could it happen to her in our home? :whistling: I just want her to be able to at least know the basics about firearms and how to use them, since they will be around the house and I would like her to know how to protect herself when I'm not around. How can I bring her to reality and get her interested in her own defense?

ChiefWPD
11-02-2012, 19:35
Turbo:

I put over 41 years as a LEO (two depts, +20 years each) and a FI for around 35 years. My wife is basically indifferent to firearms. I can get her to the range if she knows she'll be there only so long as she's comfortable and so long as she gets to shoot one of her favorite .22s (she'll shoot a 9mm Glock, but prefers the .22s).

My point is, don't force her into anything. She'll resent it and your efforts will be counterproductive. If you can find a competent instructor (not you, you're holding on to too much baggage already in regard firearms) to teach her the basics that might work.

Again, don't get too pushy on the matter or that attitude will work against you.

Best of luck.

Turbodiesel
11-02-2012, 20:01
Thank you sir...of course you always hope to hear something else, but your reasoning here (not to mention being backed up with lots of experience) certainly makes sense. I guess I'll jus have to move with the fact she may never quite understand my point of view! But that's life I guess isn't it :) thanks again.

Citroen
11-05-2012, 12:49
Turbo - reality means different things to different people. I am often told, "nothing could ever happen here. This is a 'nice' neighborhood".

It may not work but in answer to that I often suggest doing a Google search for Dr. William Petit in Cheshire, CN.

Or, you could look up "The Knoxville Five" story.

Truth is, none of us have the ability to predict the future - if we could, we would probably not be there when something bad happens.

I keep fire extinguishers in my home and car; I keep my spare tire inflated and I carry life insurance. I know how to use the extinguisher and how to change a tire. I hope I will not have to use any but I suspect one day, I will.
John
Charlotte, NC

Glock30Eric
11-05-2012, 14:22
My suggestion is a really dangerous and very effective. Please take a careful consideration in this.

You might want to talk with your two or three friends with a van to have a mock break-in your house while your GF is in the house. That will surely give your GF a reality call. You'll might have to deal with cops responding to this call. You'll have to pay some of $$ for few of broken windows.

I don't really think your GF will want to stay with you after all of this, lol. At least I gave you something to think about.

uhlawpup
11-05-2012, 20:49
My suggestion is a really dangerous and very effective. Please take a careful consideration in this.

You might want to talk with your two or three friends with a van to have a mock break-in your house while your GF is in the house. That will surely give your GF a reality call. You'll might have to deal with cops responding to this call. You'll have to pay some of $$ for few of broken windows.

I don't really think your GF will want to stay with you after all of this, lol. At least I gave you something to think about.

Oh dear God, NO!

Please don't do this.

In all myyears on this forum, I have never heard a more shamelessly irresponsible suggestion,

Please, please don't.

Glock30Eric, please say you were kidding.

furioso2112
11-05-2012, 21:33
All it took for me was walking - we got some dogs and started walking around our neighborhood - by a year's end, she had seen enough to change her tune to "I don't like guns, but I'm glad you carry one.' I replied, of course, "what you mean...'one'?"

TK-421
11-05-2012, 21:56
Find the hottest, hunkiest, youngest well trained firearms instructor you can find, and have him teach her while he's not wearing a shirt. :tongueout:

Glock30Eric
11-06-2012, 05:13
Oh dear God, NO!

Please don't do this.

In all myyears on this forum, I have never heard a more shamelessly irresponsible suggestion,

Please, please don't.

Glock30Eric, please say you were kidding.

I won't do the suggestion I have made.

Paul53
11-06-2012, 12:17
Find a female instructor!

jp3975
11-06-2012, 16:23
Find out about crime in your area. Maybe if you can show her that someone in the neighborhood was broken into she'll talke it more seriously.

People in good neighborhoods are killed/broken into every day. Why would a thief want to break into a house in the ghetto?

We had a TV anchor woman raped then killed with a hammer. And an old lady had her throat cut during a breakin.

Both of them where in nice neighborhoods.

Someone mentioned Dr. William Petit. He came home and was held up by two men just released from prison. He had two underage daughters and a wife. They tied him up and beat him with a bat...raped one of the daughters and wife...then set them all on fire. The Dr. got away and the neighbor didnt even recognize him, he was beaten so bad. His whole family was killed.

Citroen
11-07-2012, 18:41
jp - one reason I recommend the story of the Dr. Petit is that the details reveal so much. Read the entire account and see for yourself if this is a motivator for gun ownership.

Quick summary: the two criminals saw Mrs. Petit and oldest daughter at the Walmart and decided to commit a crime; the criminals followed them home; left and got a can of gasoline, a BB gun and some tape/rope.

They returned after Midnight and found a back door unlocked; entered and found Dr. Petit asleep on the sofa. Obviously the Doctor thought the BB gun was a firearm; he was bound and thrown down the basement stairs .... Google the rest of the story as it is a grizzley case with powerful impact. Note that when the police arrived they did not immediately enter the home.

As I said, see for yourself if it offers valuable lessons.\
John
Charlotte, NC

jp3975
11-07-2012, 21:49
jp - one reason I recommend the story of the Dr. Petit is that the details reveal so much. Read the entire account and see for yourself if this is a motivator for gun ownership.

Quick summary: the two criminals saw Mrs. Petit and oldest daughter at the Walmart and decided to commit a crime; the criminals followed them home; left and got a can of gasoline, a BB gun and some tape/rope.

They returned after Midnight and found a back door unlocked; entered and found Dr. Petit asleep on the sofa. Obviously the Doctor thought the BB gun was a firearm; he was bound and thrown down the basement stairs .... Google the rest of the story as it is a grizzley case with powerful impact. Note that when the police arrived they did not immediately enter the home.

As I said, see for yourself if it offers valuable lessons.\
John
Charlotte, NC

Looks like i got a few details wrong. I was going off of memory from when the case was in the news and discussed here.

Sneegrl
11-09-2012, 12:14
.....

Bushflyr
11-14-2012, 00:50
She's in denial. It's common and there really isn't much you can do about it. The thought of "anything bad" happening to her is too scary, so she chooses to ignore it.

If you want to get her shooting you're going to have to approach it from the fun angle. Maybe a .22 or a pellet gun, popping some tin cans or something for a few minutes.

dwhite53
11-14-2012, 14:26
Does she have a fire extinguisher? If so, why?

There are more robberies/burglaries in the U.S. than house fires.

Even the development I live in. In 17 years three house fires requiring a fire company response. Probably 10 burglaries/break-ins minimum where the police were called in. Was burgled myself.

All the Best,
D. White

nightnurse
11-16-2012, 07:10
Not sure your version of reality is any more accurate than hers, but......

Do you have any friends with a wife or girlfriend who is prep-minded? Introduce them, let the "reality-minded" woman work on her. A lot of women can tell when you are working them, but don't really notice when another woman is.

kcb
11-17-2012, 19:34
Upstate New York? And she thinks nothing can happen to her in THIS day and age?

I have raised my family, and my daughters are now both married, but before I was 32 years old, I had been the victim of just about every crime you can think of EXCEPT murder. AND that was in the "good ol' days" when people say they didn't even lock their doors.

Tell her....it CAN happen to her. Sad to say, but true.

My poor daughters had to deal with an extremely overprotective mother and father throughout their lives, because I knew first hand what could happen!

reelnative
11-20-2012, 20:48
hate to say it man but you need to get rid of her yep kick her liberal ass to the curb, you will never be happy with this woman, she is one of them, go find yourself a woman that will cook you dinner then clean your guns after, and one that will buy you weapons for gifts, and buggs you all week about taking her to the range, only then will you find what you are looking for

Kingarthurhk
11-24-2012, 10:36
I went through this with my wife when we were first married. I owned several firearms and I was in the Border Patrol. Guns were a tool of the trade and a hobby. She was raised with the mentality that guns were evil and not to be talked about, and they killed people on their own.

I explained to her, that if were were going to have children together, it would be important for her to learn firearms safety because there would always be firearms in the house. That realization and watching enough "crime stories" got her to come around. Her first firearm was a two trigger double barrel shotgun.

We've been married for 13 years, and have two children. Guns are still the tool of the trade, and now she owns three handguns and has a CCL. You can't just drop it all on her at once like a ton of bricks. She needs to come to realization herself.

SASJen
11-26-2012, 14:58
I like TK241's idea!! Except have him just wear a tight shirt. Don't want to teach her to shoot topless. May get burned by brass! LOL!
..and that first officer who said just to get her competent and not push. --and use a hunky good natured man to teach her :)

LiebeGlock
11-27-2012, 19:57
No!!! Don't get rid of her. There is hope for her! I used to be anit-HANDgun. And totally oblivious to crime even while being a single mother living with her 4 year old son in the middle of FLINT! (Flint Michigan, ever heard of it? NOT the safest place.)

You're thread is really inspiring to me. I am trying to find different ways to get girls into guns, to retrain their way of thinking like my mind has turned around. I have recently started putting videos on Youtube to help guys like yourself or girls who need to learn more about guns. I haven't gotten far nor have I done a good job in expressing what I want to say.

But like the guys said above showing her the basics, not pushing her too far WILL help, getting another girl involved will help. More than likely, a hot instructor will NOT help. LOL! Here is one of my videos to help. (There is better out there on Youtube, I'm sure.) But I will get a REAL good one for the girls with the whole, "This will NEVER happen to me because..." issue.

How to get your chick to like guns! Especially a Glock! - YouTube

Chris Brines
12-01-2012, 10:19
I have a question regarding my girlfriend. I am going to a police academy in a few short weeks, and my father is a retired Law Enforcement Officer himself. I realize there are evil people in this world and we must stand ready to defend ourselves if necessary. That being said, I live in a mostly rural area. As such, whenever I try to teach my girlfriend anything about self defense or firearms she rolls her eyes as if "nothing could ever happen to her, especially HERE!" No one she's ever known has had anything bad happen to them, so how could it happen to her in our home? :whistling: I just want her to be able to at least know the basics about firearms and how to use them, since they will be around the house and I would like her to know how to protect herself when I'm not around. How can I bring her to reality and get her interested in her own defense?

A rural area would be the most ideal place for a sexual predator to attack. Nobody to come running for help or hear her screaming. If she refuses to really take on a defensive mindset, and go practice shooting and/or pick out a gun for herself, I'd just buy her a 38 special and tell her "here, it's there if you need it". One thing about a 38 special, you can teach someone how to use it without even making them really shoot it. So simple, load the rounds, close the cylinder, point and shoot. Or cock the hammer if you have time. Also the chance of accidental discharges with a 38 is slim to none. Still though, it would be in her own best interest to familiarize herself with firearms.

I feel your pain though, I live in a major metro area, have a wife who is terrified of guns (she grew up in a place where guns are outlawed, and only outlaws have guns, Mexico), but I more or less forced her to learn to shoot a Glock safely and efficiently. She went kicking and screaming (not literally) the whole time, but at this point I am more than confident she can handle a Glock, a 357 magnum, and/or an AR15 safely and effectively if need be.

SASJen
12-01-2012, 13:48
I partially disagree with Chris Barnes. I don't think you should just had the gun over and expect her to suddenly be proficient in the second that she needs to be. Guns ARE easy to operate, once you learn. But I have had people time and again just look at a gun befuddled and nervous, and they ask, "What do I do? How do I hold it? Is there a safety? Do I just pull the trigger?" Although, I am very suspicious that Mr. Barnes didn't mean it LITERALLY, given that he is pro-teaching basics ;) BTW, Mr. Barnes, congrats on your girl learning :)

Anyhoo, back to the idea of an untrained person using a gun effectively for self defense... Arming a woman (or man) without training for technique and MINDSET can be disastrous. I'd be so worried about someone disarming her and using the gun against her and who knows who else.

If she won't "go there" with guns, what about a Taser? The C2 Taser runs about $360, including case, extra barb/battery unit, and practice unit.

4Rules
12-01-2012, 14:10
http://www.gunlaws.com/images/PhotoMed/FLT_Hupp.jpg http://www.gunlaws.com/images/PhotoMed/ThankGodIHadAGun.jpg http://www.gunlaws.com/images/Photo/CHM6.jpg http://www.gunlaws.com/images/Photo/AF2.jpg

http://www.gunlaws.com/books.htm (http://www.gunlaws.com/books.htm)

misunderestimated
12-01-2012, 14:34
Not every person is willing or capable of defending themselves with a fire arm or any type of a weapon.I always remember an old boss used to carry a 357 on his hip barely covered by a vest. one day some one was stealing from behind our shop and he pulled his 357 and told the guy to freeze and the guy charged us and my boss started shaking. I was only 16 and had to get into with the guy and my boss never jumped in but some fellow workers did
I was so lucky that day as I learned 3 things that day

1-Some people who will carry and draw a gun are not mentally prepared or trained to pull the trigger

2-Never draw you gun unless you are prepared to destroy the thing its pointed at

2-Some people are not afraid of getting shot and will count on knowing not every one is going to fire the gun

Fight,

Flight,

Freeze

Sometimes its a mistake to force some one to carry a gun to make you feel better

I have a dog for my families protection in case they are not capable of protecting themselves. The dog knows that is its purpose and is ready for the job

patriot73
12-05-2012, 19:54
If I may put my two cents in here. My gf hated guns before we got together, and understandably so. Her exhusband played Russian roulette with her for about two hours with a revolver. He was heavily intoxicated, which oddly enough is what saved her. He forgot to load the one round needed to "properly play". Long story short, she now likes to go shooting and has shot my LCP, G24 and G23. Patience and understanding was the key to me changing her opinion of firearms. Would she actually pull the trigger in a defensive situation, I don't know. It's hard to speculate on such, but at least I now know she is comfortable with firearms in the home.

firedawg60
12-08-2012, 18:25
My wife was kind of like this. She had a .45 held to her head several years ago. Kind of turned her off on guns. So in the last 5 years she's gone from not liking guns to going shooting. Now she's still not wild about them, but she is talking about getting her permit.

I started by taking her to the range with me. I'd ask her if she wanted to shoot and she said no. After a couple of times like this, she wanted to shoot my Glock. She fired about 4 rounds and decided the .40 was too much for her wrist. I borrowed a friends G-22 with a .22 conversion kit. She fell in love with that. I ended up getting a Sig Mosquito and she shoots that when we go. The last time I had her shoot my S&W 586 with .38. She did great with that.

Now in the last couple of weeks we've had 2 vehicles and and a trailer of ATV's stolen a block south of us and a break in this morning a block north of us. And yes, we live in a good neighborhood, but it's happening everywhere. She wants to go to the range again on Monday.

My advise, move slow with her and not push too much. I'm afraid you'll turn her off even more. Just let her move at her pace with it. Good luck.

Pier23
12-09-2012, 16:23
In all likelihood, nothing WILL happen to her...but...several years ago a retired music teacher in our rural area of Ohio was tied, tortured and subsequently shot and killed ay assailants over a six hour period. He was also a good friend, so it DOES happen, even in the country.

If she is not into lethal options, what about non-lethal..a dog to give some warning, and some pepper spray?

People recognize threats or they don't...nuthin' much you can do about it either way.

rauldduke1979
12-09-2012, 21:57
My suggestion is a really dangerous and very effective. Please take a careful consideration in this.

You might want to talk with your two or three friends with a van to have a mock break-in your house while your GF is in the house. That will surely give your GF a reality call. You'll might have to deal with cops responding to this call. You'll have to pay some of $$ for few of broken windows.

I don't really think your GF will want to stay with you after all of this, lol. At least I gave you something to think about.

You, sir, win the Internet :faint:

Cannot wait until the day - about 2 weeks from now - when we get the thread "Staged a mock-home invasion and GF wants to press charges, what to do?" :rofl:

To the OP: I think you went wrong when you tried to push gun=self defense a little too fast. Why can't guns=having fun plinking with a .22 rifle. And as the new shooter becomes more comfortable with firearms, perhaps move on to center fire pistols or shotguns that might be more appropriate for SD/HD.

Try to make it fun.

Edited to add: plinking fun can get the new shooter comfortable enough with firearms to learn the basic rule of safe handling. The Boy Scouts have known this for decades.

Kingarthurhk
12-10-2012, 17:41
My suggestion is a really dangerous and very effective. Please take a careful consideration in this.

You might want to talk with your two or three friends with a van to have a mock break-in your house while your GF is in the house. That will surely give your GF a reality call. You'll might have to deal with cops responding to this call. You'll have to pay some of $$ for few of broken windows.

I don't really think your GF will want to stay with you after all of this, lol. At least I gave you something to think about.

That is the stupidest crap I have heard in a long time. You weren't the guy I went across four lanes to draw down on for pretending to kidnap your daughter were you?

The guy got as big as saucers when I ran the stop sign and went across all four lanes when he decided it would be funny to pull up fast and jump out and snatch her walking home from school.

He about ate a Glock 19 that day.

The moral of the story is don't do stupid crap like you are suggesting, it could end badly. Had the dude decided to speed off without explanation it would have broke really ugly.

ithaca_deerslayer
12-10-2012, 17:54
Offer to marry her if she carries.