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Upgrayedd
04-29-2013, 19:11
I've been having a problem with a guy at work who is messing with me. I can take a joke, but this isn't good spirited fun. Today a joke was played at my expense that just went too far. I usually just let it roll off and get back to work, but this one deserves a response. Any suggestions would be appreciated.:wavey:

stk10767
04-29-2013, 19:15
Sleep with his wife.

oppi27
04-29-2013, 19:17
Sleep with his wife.

X2


Best response ever.

Upgrayedd
04-29-2013, 19:19
Sleep with his wife.

If there was a wife, I would!.:supergrin:

davew83
04-29-2013, 19:26
Spray plasti dip all over his car.


Plasti Dip Peel - EuroCustomsPR - YouTube

THEPOPE
04-29-2013, 19:29
If there was a wife, I would!.:supergrin:

Then, sleep with his boyfriend....no judgements here...

I am out......:cool:

Gixxerjoe04
04-29-2013, 19:29
Well what did he do? Can't give good advice without knowing what he did.

F14Scott
04-29-2013, 19:39
http://d24w6bsrhbeh9d.cloudfront.net/photo/7065513_700b.jpg

Upgrayedd
04-29-2013, 19:44
Well what did he do? Can't give good advice without knowing what he did.

I know, but I can't put that on here. All I can say is it was not fun. He had some helpers, so I'd prefer a carpet bombing approach over a surgical strike.

Upgrayedd
04-29-2013, 19:50
Then, sleep with his boyfriend....no judgements here...

I am out......:cool:

That's funny, I was considering putting rainbow stickers on the offenders cars.

Jeremy_K
04-29-2013, 19:53
What type of work setting is it? Office, Construction site, etc? Have him paged outside while waiting overhead with a bucket of water.

Sharkey
04-29-2013, 19:54
A certain magazine addressed to the office?

Take day off and do something to his house? Explain to his neighbors something about him that may not be true?

Kinda hard when we don't know what was done r the environment in which you work.

Follow him into the bathroom and let your fists do the talking?

Tell HR he is making advances towards you and bullying you since that is the hot topic?

Upgrayedd
04-29-2013, 20:03
A certain magazine addressed to the office?

Take day off and do something to his house? Explain to his neighbors something about him that may not be true?

Kinda hard when we don't know what was done r the environment in which you work.

Follow him into the bathroom and let your fists do the talking?

Tell HR he is making advances towards you and bullying you since that is the hot topic?

Machine shop.

Dennis in MA
04-29-2013, 20:04
Weld his vice shut.

HollowHead
04-29-2013, 20:05
Machine shop.

That makes it easy. Unground his station. HH

Upgrayedd
04-29-2013, 20:06
Weld his vice shut.

My friend said to fill his tool box with grease.:supergrin:

rednoved
04-29-2013, 20:07
You shouldn't seek revenge if you can't even tell random people on the internet what happened. If it's that big of a deal, you need to get with HR or boss and find a solution that way.

I really hope you aren't telling us because you are embarrassed. If that were the case, I'd say man up. People get jokes played on them all the time. A common occurrence of them is often decided by the way you react to the jokes.

Strike back, or cop out.

Judging by your response, I'd say your best bet would be to tattle to the teacher. Not that it's a bad thing...

ezthumper
04-29-2013, 20:12
Bake a chocolate pie with Ex-Lax and let them go at it.

Carpet bombing.

However, might net some collateral damage.

Upgrayedd
04-29-2013, 20:14
You shouldn't seek revenge if you can't even tell random people on the internet what happened. If it's that big of a deal, you need to get with HR or boss and find a solution that way.

I really hope you aren't telling us because you are embarrassed. If that were the case, I'd say man up. People get jokes played on them all the time. A common occurrence of them is often decided by the way you react to the jokes.

Strike back, or cop out.

Judging by your response, I'd say your best bet would be to tattle to the teacher. Not that it's a bad thing...

Relax buddy. It's not like I'm looking for he killed my family style revenge. Just a push back to say stop f'n with me. Yeah, I'm embarrassed, but that's not why I don't want to give details. I just don't want to document the circumstances. I'd gladly ask the boss for help if I thought he actually could help.

I'M Glockamolie
04-29-2013, 20:18
Creative craigslist ads are always fun. Use your imagination, and their phone number. Man on man love, a free TV that's not needed anymore, a toolbox for sale for $50...

Gixxerjoe04
04-29-2013, 20:31
Does he/they drink coffee or something in the morning? If so, put laxatives in it, plastic wrap over the toilet for back splash, take out all the tp. Boom

LASTRESORT20
04-29-2013, 20:38
http://images.zap2it.com/images/movie-34417/man-on-fire-6.jpg
"Im a Professional"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=jIF8U-s5y1g

427
04-29-2013, 21:08
Tooth picks in everything of his that has a keyhole. Everything.

Or one of these:

http://www.elicenseplateframes.com/vsadmin/product/templates/thumb/245.png

Adjuster
04-29-2013, 21:35
My favorite. You gotta sneak into his house. Unless he does his hair at the shop?


http://youtu.be/GsE4qEfEfO4


/

ChiefWPD
04-29-2013, 21:40
What you're describing is not a "practical joke." Something is going on at your workplace and you have a responsibility to tell your supervisor/boss about the situation. Then document the contact with your boss, as in put it in writing.

You might well want to speak to a labor lawyer about now. Frankly, I think you are underestimating the seriousness of the situation you are dealing with.

vikingsoftpaw
04-29-2013, 21:47
Take floor jack and four cinder blocks. Jack up his vehicle and place cinder blocks under four places under vehicle - just enough to lift the car so that wheels don't make contact with the ground.

Cover his favorite crapper with Saran Wrap just in time for his morning dump.

rednoved
04-29-2013, 21:53
Just use the threat of workplace violence. Follow it up by randomly pace around the office mumbling and talking to yourself.

There is a good chance they will stop picking on you.

427
04-29-2013, 22:00
The best revenge might be a lawsuit containing the words hostile work environment, intimidation, innuendo and sexual harassment.

frank4570
04-29-2013, 22:09
"Laying chickens for sale. $5 each. Please call before 7am or after 10pm"

frank4570
04-29-2013, 22:10
Re-arrange the wheel weights on the tires of his car so that his tires act like footballs.

jame
04-29-2013, 22:12
Raw chicken and upholstery don't mix well. Especially over time.

Summer time is best.

frank4570
04-29-2013, 22:15
Are you willing to pay for a male stripper?
If not, are you willing to pay for a female stripper while his wife is there?

98LS-WON
04-29-2013, 23:07
Put Snap-n-pops (little things you throw on the ground and make a loud noise) underneath the spacers that hold the toilet seat away from the porcelain. They'll explode when people sit down.

skeeter7
04-29-2013, 23:21
Take a crap in his lunchbox. That should send a message.

NMG26
04-29-2013, 23:23
:popcorn:

Machine shop horse play.

If Ohio is anything like Kentucky was...........this should be fun.

You really do have to tell though.

What did he do? For the thread!

.

Angry Fist
04-29-2013, 23:33
My friend said to fill his tool box with grease.:supergrin:
Buy creme filled doughnuts, remove the creme and fill them with mayonnaise. We used white sillicone caulk on this one jagoff, but I wouldn't advocate something like that on the internet. :whistling:

NMG26
04-30-2013, 00:02
I've been picked on before.

Best way to handle is to not give the desired result.

Laugh it off.

If it keeps happening give the guy a hug, it seems he likes you.

You probably will not beat him as HIS game, so play your own.

.

eccho
04-30-2013, 00:43
I've been having a problem with a guy at work who is messing with me. I can take a joke, but this isn't good spirited fun. Today a joke was played at my expense that just went too far. I usually just let it roll off and get back to work, but this one deserves a response. Any suggestions would be appreciated.:wavey:

Tell him to knock it off. If he doesn't knock it off, complain to a superior.

gwalchmai
04-30-2013, 05:10
Annoy-a-tron

LoadToadBoss
04-30-2013, 05:30
Work hard, get promoted and then fire his butt.

...or, rearrange some of the keys on his keyboard

...or, download porn to his computer and make an anonymous complaint to HR

M&P Shooter
04-30-2013, 05:35
Any suggestions would be appreciated.:wavey:
http://i63.photobucket.com/albums/h126/melanie526/houseof1000corpses10.jpg

Tvov
04-30-2013, 05:52
Tell him in front of everyone that you appreciate his interest in you, but his advances are getting to be a bit much and to stop since you prefer women anyways.

Not that there's anything wrong with that...

Jeremy_K
04-30-2013, 05:56
Sardines in his tool box, doe pee around his work area, order a pizza to the shop in his name, stash a baggie full of parsley in his work area and ask the boss about it. Annoyatrons are great to but they may go un noticed in a machine shop or annoy the wrong person. Whatever you do, do not let anyone else know you're doing it. The rats come out of the woodwork around promotion time.

SC Tiger
04-30-2013, 07:36
My friend said to fill his tool box with grease.:supergrin:

Do you have a A-B Foam Packing Machine? Bunch of packing peanuts?

SC Tiger
04-30-2013, 07:38
deleted

SC Tiger
04-30-2013, 07:39
Work hard, get promoted and then fire his butt.

...or, rearrange some of the keys on his keyboard

...or, download porn to his computer and make an anonymous complaint to HR

Can't find it right now but there is a device you can plug in the back of a computer (looks like a jump drive) that makes it do random stuff occasionally - mixing up keystrokes, random mouse moves, stuff like that.

Sharkey
04-30-2013, 08:04
Great ideas on some of these. The toothpick idea is great.

strack350
04-30-2013, 08:14
Wow so many possiblities in a machine shop environment, I work in a similar place and have tons of ideas going through my head.

We really need to know what he did, so you can come back with something at the same or higher level....:cool: If you don't want to give specifics, then generalize so we have something to work with.

KevinFACE
04-30-2013, 08:25
Can't find it right now but there is a device you can plug in the back of a computer (looks like a jump drive) that makes it do random stuff occasionally - mixing up keystrokes, random mouse moves, stuff like that.

It's on thinkgeek.com

Cybercowboy
04-30-2013, 08:25
Open carry would solve this.

sup
04-30-2013, 08:33
If he uses a shop phone gojo Or axle grease on the ear piece. We used to do this to our boss daily, never ever looked first because he was on the phone 100 times a day.

NMG26
04-30-2013, 08:36
Paint his allen wrenches pink.

.

oldgraywolf
04-30-2013, 09:43
"Polish" the ends of his mic standards.

Upgrayedd
04-30-2013, 09:46
While the revenge fantasy may be fun, in reality I'm there to work and don't have time to mess around. I ended up talking to the boss. He's looking into docking the people involved an hours pay and giving it to me as a bonus.

moeman
04-30-2013, 11:15
Catfish bait... Stinky!

Air intake of car near windshield base, his work area...

But don't escalate a war he will finish.

SC Tiger
04-30-2013, 11:20
"Polish" the ends of his mic standards.

Bad idea. You don't want to do anything that makes him less productive or could cause him to make a serious mistake. That will come back on you.

I've seen it happen. It did not end well for the practical joker.

bno762
04-30-2013, 11:43
I've seen a guy get his truck sprayed with aircraft stripper. The whole paint job was in a puddle on the ground when we left after work.

posted using Outdoor Hub Campfire (http://www.outdoorhub.com/mobile/)

Never Nervous
04-30-2013, 12:11
Super glue in locks always work.

NN

posted using Outdoor Hub Campfire (http://www.outdoorhub.com/mobile/)

ChiefWPD
04-30-2013, 13:00
A fair number of the suggestions posted here are fairly serious criminal acts.

The point in this thread that many are missing is that the OP wasn't the victim of a "joke" but of something (unstated but obvious by the tone of his posting) that was quite aggressive. He eventually did the correct thing and put management on notice of the situation.

We'll see how it plays out.

OhioGlock90
04-30-2013, 13:12
Put Snap-n-pops (little things you throw on the ground and make a loud noise) underneath the spacers that hold the toilet seat away from the porcelain. They'll explode when people sit down.

This is awesome!


Posted using Outdoor Hub Campfire (http://www.outdoorhub.com/mobile/)

gwalchmai
04-30-2013, 13:14
Fox urine.

SC Tiger
04-30-2013, 13:15
While the revenge fantasy may be fun, in reality I'm there to work and don't have time to mess around. I ended up talking to the boss. He's looking into docking the people involved an hours pay and giving it to me as a bonus.

Must have been serious.

Practical jokes are fun but when they start messing with your ability to do your job, it's out of hand.

TX OMFS
04-30-2013, 13:26
Creative craigslist ads are always fun. Use your imagination, and their phone number. Man on man love, a free TV that's not needed anymore, a toolbox for sale for $50...

:rofl: Awesome.

Take a crap in his lunchbox. That should send a message.

Wow. :wow:

A fair number of the suggestions posted here are fairly serious criminal acts.


Yep

Dennis in MA
04-30-2013, 15:17
I've seen a guy get his truck sprayed with aircraft stripper. The whole paint job was in a puddle on the ground when we left after work.

posted using Outdoor Hub Campfire (http://www.outdoorhub.com/mobile/)

Strippers? All I get are over the hill stews. What airline is this?

gwalchmai
04-30-2013, 16:02
Hire a child actor to pose as his love child from a long lost ex.

bno762
04-30-2013, 16:34
Take a crap in his lunchbox. That should send a message.

This has happened at my work before.

posted using Outdoor Hub Campfire (http://www.outdoorhub.com/mobile/)

Ironbar
04-30-2013, 16:40
Any way to butter his floor?

Butter Floor Prank - YouTube

HollowHead
04-30-2013, 16:49
Write up a phony resume for him that outrageously overstates what he does there and put it in the boss's copier/scanner. HH

PuroMexicano
04-30-2013, 17:12
write up a phony resume for him that outrageously overstates what he does there and put it in the boss's copier/scanner. Hh

f o r t h e w i n !!!!!!!

VC-Racing
04-30-2013, 17:34
My vote is Exlax brownies ...
A certain person did this at a office function several yrs ago and well, lets say brownies are no longer allowed to be brought on the property :D.....

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I'M Glockamolie
04-30-2013, 18:16
And if you ever need to "playfully" get back at someone and you have access to their shower facilities, all you need is pliers and some hard candy, like a Jolly Rancher. Take the shower head off, place the hard candy in the head, and reinstall. They'll never get clean in that shower, and will be sticky all day. After a few showers, it dissipates and the joke is over...but they'll never know why the shower made them feel worse.

Sharkey
05-01-2013, 07:53
Write up a phony resume for him that outrageously overstates what he does there and put it in the boss's copier/scanner. HH

Wow that is a good one.
Well played sir.

Longtooths
05-01-2013, 08:29
If you must hurt a man, do it so brutally that you need not fear his revenge.

moeman
05-01-2013, 10:25
And if you ever need to "playfully" get back at someone and you have access to their shower facilities, all you need is pliers and some hard candy, like a Jolly Rancher. Take the shower head off, place the hard candy in the head, and reinstall. They'll never get clean in that shower, and will be sticky all day. After a few showers, it dissipates and the joke is over...but they'll never know why the shower made them feel worse.

Nice!

tarpleyg
05-01-2013, 14:01
What you're describing is not a "practical joke." Something is going on at your workplace and you have a responsibility to tell your supervisor/boss about the situation. Then document the contact with your boss, as in put it in writing.

You might well want to speak to a labor lawyer about now. Frankly, I think you are underestimating the seriousness of the situation you are dealing with.

Are you serious? Jeez, man, goofing off is a way of life in a shop like that.

sappy13
05-01-2013, 14:42
And if you ever need to "playfully" get back at someone and you have access to their shower facilities, all you need is pliers and some hard candy, like a Jolly Rancher. Take the shower head off, place the hard candy in the head, and reinstall. They'll never get clean in that shower, and will be sticky all day. After a few showers, it dissipates and the joke is over...but they'll never know why the shower made them feel worse.

im gona remember this one. thats great