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PatrolMom
04-23-2003, 06:35
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT: (new 2003 version)

1. She is not a BABE or a CHICK - She is a BREASTED AMERICAN.

2. She is not a SCREAMER or MOANER - She is VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE.

3. She is not EASY - She is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.

4. She is not DUMB - She is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.

5. She has not BEEN AROUND - She is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION.

6. She is not an AIRHEAD - She is REALITY IMPAIRED.

7. She does not get DRUNK or TIPSY - She gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED.

8. She does not have BREAST IMPLANTS - She is SURGICALLY ENHANCED.

9. She does not NAG YOU - She becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE.

10. She is not a SLUT - She is SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED.

11. She does not have MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS - She is PECTORALLY SUPERIOR.

12. She is not a TWO-BIT WHORE - She is a LOW COST PROVIDER.


HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. He does not have a BEER GUT - He has developed a GRAIN ALCOHOL STORAGE
FACILITY.

2. He is not a BAD DANCER - He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.

3. He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME - He INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE
DESTINATIONS.

4. He is not BALDING - He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION.

5. He is not a CRADLE ROBBER - He prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL
RELATIONSHIPS

6. He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK-He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL.

7. He does not act like a TOTAL ASS - He develops a case of
RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.

8. He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG - He has SWINE EMPATHY.

9. He is not afraid of COMMITMENT - He is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED

10. He is not HORNY - He is SEXUALLY FOCUSED.

;f ;f ;f ;f ;f

pizzaaguy
04-23-2003, 06:44
Hey, babe...get me another beer, huh? [brrp] ;f

okie
04-23-2003, 09:23
That was funny Pmom;N ;N ;N ;N Nice to see you down here in the
lighter side. Don't see you here much.

Dennis in MA
04-23-2003, 13:06
#1 - she's a chippy. Period.

PatrolMom
04-24-2003, 12:39
Originally posted by okie
That was funny Pmom;N ;N ;N ;N Nice to see you down here in the
lighter side. Don't see you here much.

Oh, I've been known to have friends in low places too, you know...hehehe;Q ;f

joegerardi
04-24-2003, 19:10
Hey!

PatrolMom
04-24-2003, 22:27
Originally posted by joegerardi
Hey!

Well, he did say, "down here." ;Q

Mr. Slithers
04-24-2003, 23:13
does that mean, dame & broad are out;)

PatrolMom
04-25-2003, 07:12
Originally posted by Mr. Slithers
does that mean, dame & broad are out;)

Dame and broad are in, CHICK is out. I don't have feathers, dammit!