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Grog
02-08-2005, 01:58
To: All EMS Personnel
From: Chief of Operations
Subject: Proper Narrative Descriptions

It has come to our attention from several emergency rooms that many EMS narratives have taken a decidedly creative direction lately. Effective immediately, all members are to refrain from using slang and abbreviations to describe patients, such as the following:

1) Cardiac patients should not be referred to as suffering from MUH(messed up heart), PBS (pretty bad shape), PCL (pre-code looking) or HIBGIA (had it before, got it again).

2) Stroke patients are NOT "Charlie Carrots." Nor are rescuers to use CCFCCP(Coo Coo for Cocoa Puffs) to describe their mental state.

3) Trauma patients are not CATS (cut all to ****), FDGB (fall down, go boom), TBC (total body crunch) or "hamburger helper." Similarly, descriptions of a car crash do not have to include phrases like "negative vehicle to vehicle interface" or "terminal deceleration syndrome."

4) HAZMAT teams are highly trained professionals, not "glow worms."

5) Persons with altered mental states as a result of drug use are not considered "pharmaceutically gifted."

6) Gunshot wounds to the head are not "trans-occipital implants."

7) The homeless are not "urban outdoorsmen," nor is endotracheal intubation referred to as a "PVC Challenge."

8) And finally, do not refer to recently deceased persons as being "paws up", ART (assuming room temperature), CC (Cancel Christmas), CTD (circling the drain), DRT (dead right there) or NLPR (no longer playing records).

7.62mmFMJ
02-08-2005, 18:45
;z ;z ;z

scottlang
02-09-2005, 21:47
YOU OWE ME A NEW KEYBOARD!!!!

jlw_84
02-09-2005, 22:32
Pure Gold. That one is getting printed out and hung up at the station.

Aquanewt
02-09-2005, 23:10
DRT has been popular in the Baltimore, Murderland for some time.

CRider
02-10-2005, 10:11
LMFAO, thank you!

JByer323
02-11-2005, 22:38
Originally posted by jlw_84
Pure Gold. That one is getting printed out and hung up at the station.

x2

StoneGiant
02-12-2005, 19:39
The attached file contains many acronyms you won't want to use on patient reports....

Slinger646
02-13-2005, 18:29
Its amazing how many of these ive actually seen used....