Before and after

[okie]

Before and After Marriage
Before - You take my breath away.
After - I feel like I'm suffocating.

Before - Twice a night.
After - Twice a month.

Before - She loves the way I take control of a Situation.
After - She called me a controlling, manipulative, egomaniac.

Before - Ricky & Lucy.
After - Fred & Ethel.

Before - Don't Stop.
After - Don't Start.

Before - Is that all you are eating?
After - Maybe you should just have a salad, honey.

Before - It's like living a dream.
After - It's a nightmare.

Before - $60/dozen.
After - $1.50/stem.

Before - We agree on everything!
After - Doesn't she have a mind of her own?

Before - Victoria's Secret.
After - Fruit of the Loom.

Before - Feathers & handcuffs.
After - Ball and chain.

Before - He's lost without me.
After - Why can't he ask for directions?

Before - When together, time stands still.
After - This relationship is going nowhere.

Before - Croissant and cappuccino.
After - Bagels and instant coffee.

Before - I can hardly believe we found each other.
After - How the hell did I end up with someone like you?