T-shirts [Archive] - Glock Talk

PDA

View Full Version : T-shirts


Zathras
06-05-2001, 08:27
Was just thinking over some of the funny T-shirts I've seen in my life. Here are a few:

Large, close up head-shot of a rooster. Underneath, a caption saying "CHICKEN SHIRT".

A couple on the beach, the wife very pregnant. Her t-shirt: an arrow pointing to her tummy and a sign saying, "Under Construction". His t-shirt: "Construction Worker".

My personal favorite: a plain shirt with no logo or picture of any kind saying in plain print: "I am the man from Nantucket".

Oracle In Training
06-06-2001, 07:16
I saw an old timer this morning with a sweatshirt that said "Over what hill?, where? when?"

PeterJ87
06-06-2001, 13:42
Friend from HS was 6'11". He had a shirt made up "Yes the weather up here is fine"

Steve Koski
06-07-2001, 18:32
"I am the man from Nantucket."

Oh my heavens, I have tears rolling down my cheeks and my side is going to split open.

LOL!!!!

Thank you.

Koski

06-07-2001, 19:55
[QUOTE]Originally posted by Zathras:
[B]Was just thinking over some of the funny T-shirts I've seen in my life. A couple on the beach, the wife very pregnant. Her t-shirt: an arrow pointing to her tummy and a sign saying, "Under Construction". His t-shirt: "Construction Worker".

I saw one tasteless t-shirt one night at a local Wal-Mart.A woman probably about 9 months pregnant and very big was walking down an aisle with a large grin.Walking past her I saw that her shirt read,in large letters,I SHOULD HAVE SWALLOWED.Not a shy person I guess!

CanadianGlockFan
06-08-2001, 03:46
I saw one yesterday that said "Yes, I'm trying to see things your way, but I can't get my head that far up my ***". I burst out laughing right there :-)

PeterJ87
06-08-2001, 05:53
Back in my HS days when the Big Johnson and "Coed Naked" shirts were getting to be the rage, we took a trip to Denver. I found in a store there "Bungee Condoms" and this cartoon guy jumping off a bridge with a condom on his, yeah.

"If you're in the partying mode, make sure your condom can handle the load: Bungee Condoms" is what it said on the back

Wherever we went guys were laughing their butts off to that one. A few girls got whiney, but what's new.

XKR
06-08-2001, 09:28
Originally posted by Zathras:
My personal favorite: a plain shirt with no logo or picture of any kind saying in plain print: "I am the man from Nantucket".
If you actually GO to Nantucket, you can buy those shirts in any one of a hundred twee little gift shops. Also ones that say "My husband is the man from Nantucket." It stops being cute really fast.

Zathras
06-08-2001, 09:36
Originally posted by XKR:
If you actually GO to Nantucket, you can buy those shirts in any one of a hundred twee little gift shops. Also ones that say "My husband is the man from Nantucket." It stops being cute really fast.[/B]

I'm sure it does. However, that was the first time I'd ever seen it, and I haven't seen it since. A good joke is funny the first time.

XKR
06-08-2001, 09:39
Originally posted by Zathras:
I'm sure it does. However, that was the first time I'd ever seen it, and I haven't seen it since. A good joke is funny the first time.
Yes, it is. Didn't mean to rain on your joke, sorry.

Thinking of Nantucket made me think of my ex-wife. Put me in kind of a negative frame of mind, I guess. She loved it there. I could barely stand it.

johnboy
06-08-2001, 14:12
I saw one that had on the front "Wanna Raise Hell?" and on the back it had "Hell Yeah!"

IDPA Sharpshooter
06-09-2001, 09:50
Last week in Birmingham, passing by a ladies' clothing shop:

Pretty in pink,
Wicked in uniform.

Girlfriend LOVED that one!

------------------
An armed man is a citizen, an unarmed man is a subject..

MrMurphy
06-10-2001, 12:32
Two friends of mine, then a civilian and an Airborne Lieutenant, now a Ranger (enlisted) and Airborne 1st Lieutenant, had identical black t-shirts with white stencil-type lettering that said "Chicks dig pale skinny guys" which, compared to some, they qualified as (though being a wrestling coach and a paratrooper, I don't know about skinny).

Those two also (along with a Marine friend of theirs I also knew) had identical black t-shirts with large white stenciled letters that said GROUPIE.

When you see three large white guys all in good physical shape with buzzed haircuts and GROUPIE t-shirts, you start to wonder who they're Groupies FOR...... http://glocktalk.com/docs/gtubb/smile.gif (them shirts got them some dates, suprisingly enough!)

They bought them at a Hot Topic store in Orange County (CA) where they all live(d).

N4CDLAW
06-11-2001, 20:52
Plain black T-shirt with white lettering:


I AM A BOMB TECHNICIAN
If you see me running, try to catch up!

There's a pic on the 'net with a bunch of guys standing around wearing camo pants and black T-shirts like they might be a SWAT team, but one of the guys was wearing this shirt.

BIG C IN BIG D
06-11-2001, 21:07
I always liked."I may be fat.But your ugly and I can diet".

------------------
http://www.animfactory.com/animations/creatures/smileys/smiley_md_wht.gif

rotti
06-12-2001, 17:30
My favorite is
Christian
American
Heterosexual
PRO-GUN
Conservative
Any questions?


------------------
ROT'S RULE

tous
06-12-2001, 18:23
University of Wisconsin, 1972.
A very pregnant young woman was seen often about campus wearing a T-shirt stating, 'Nixon's the One.'
I believe that was a legitimate campaign slogan of the '72 Nixon endeavor.

------------------
tous
2.9979E10 cm/sec -- it's not just a good idea; it the law

3MartiniLunch
06-12-2001, 19:21
A HUGE fat guy (6'3"plus, 400#plus) sitting on a cooler at Preakness this year. Shirt said: "I AM BIGGER THAN YOU."

Someone gave these away on campus as a credit card signup promotion UNTIL some idiot was offended and complained:
"Freshman Chicks.
Get 'em while they're still skinny"

CastleBravo
06-13-2001, 08:55
Also seen on a bumper sticker:

"Feminist Chicks Dig Me."



------------------
CastleBravo
10 Ring # 5150
"For every human problem, there is a neat, simple solution; and it is always wrong." -- H.L. Mencken
The Pit: http://www.geocities.com/mr_motorhead/index.html

Warblade
06-13-2001, 13:46
One my Mom gave me
(in cursive)
I don't suffer from insanity
I enjoy every minute of it

------------------
Proud member of the vast, right-wing conspiracy.
Banning guns to reduce crime is like banning sex to reduce rape.
Think globally. Act locally. SHOOT BACK!

Hines57
06-15-2001, 21:55
My personal favorite:
Let go of my ears, I know what I'm doing

------------------
In the end, what's deserved always gets served.

Glock 17,20,24c and now 35

gogburn
06-16-2001, 20:31
Saw one that had a line across the chest with "Must be This Tall to Ride" written under the line.

Zathras
06-21-2001, 14:13
"Nuke a Godless Communist gay baby seal for Christ"

birdman
06-22-2001, 11:09
On the back of the T-shirt of a male biker:
"if you can read this the b*tch fell off"

On the back of the T-shirt of his girlfriend:
"if you can read this the d*ck won't let me drive"

(didn't see this myself but heard the story once)
Birdman

45owner
06-22-2001, 21:01
Tastes like chicken

I'm with stupid--->

Instant A-hole just add alcahol

crossfire
06-24-2001, 03:44
Some people are alive simply because it is illegal to kill them

------------------
You could drive that car better with that cell phone stuck up your a**

Newcop761
06-26-2001, 10:34
Plain black t-shirt with very small print over left chest (about a size 8 font):

Nosey little *****er aren't you?




[This message has been edited by Newcop761 (edited 06-26-2001).]

DeetsMan
06-29-2001, 01:07
Best T-shirt ever
Eat Salmon, the Other Pink Meat

Santa CruZin
06-29-2001, 02:23
I have a t-shirt that I wear proudly:

If I gave a shi-
You'd be the first
Person I'd give it to

Glockarmorer
06-29-2001, 10:17
"Beer...helping ugly people get laid since 1862!"
www.fukentees.com (http://www.fukentees.com)


G.A.

------------------
"No cops, know anarchy!"
The Officer Down Memorial Page (http://www.odmp.org)

johnboy
06-30-2001, 09:16
"Earth First.....We'll Log The Other Planets Later"

suckersrus
07-01-2001, 14:58
"I'd kill for a deer steak"

------------------
I'm a sucker for the S&W J-frame revolvers.

DOCSpanky
07-02-2001, 08:16
My favorite that I own....

"Do I look like a fu**ing people person?"

Also bought at Hot Topic!

------------------
When in doubt, empty the mag!

SW9M
07-04-2001, 02:31
White T-shirt black letters that said;

"Silly fagget, d*cks are for chicks"



------------------
Royalty prefer: an unarmed peasant.

CarbineKid
07-05-2001, 08:44
I seen a shirt that said; Work Harder! Millions of people on welfare are depending on you! I also seen a shirt that said I speared Britney

Wiley
07-05-2001, 10:20
There's one around for the Infantry among us:

Pic of a Grunt in full combat with this over:

If you die first,
We're splitting up your gear!

Wahoo
07-05-2001, 13:14
It's not that life is so short...
it's just that you're going to be dead for so long.

xwing
07-05-2001, 14:43
My wife has one that says" IM NOT "A" B*TCH, IM T.H.E. b*TCH! AND IM MS. B*TCH TO YOU!"
and one that says "I HAVE PMS AND A HANDGUN...ANY QUESTION?!"

------------------
BIG DAWG #803 "Hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good blaster at your side kid"

trozau
07-06-2001, 02:57
a "No Fear" T-shirt reads:

"the older I get,
the better I was."

------------------
Niner & Big Dawg #1736
G17(Jake) & G36(Elwood)
(06/1988) & (10/2000)
"The Blues Brothers"

"happiness is a warm gun!" - Lennon/McCartney, 1968

Emerson
07-06-2001, 16:53
If you run - You'll just die tired.

Emerson

Jim Mayhugh
07-06-2001, 18:05
Had these made special:

Black Golf Shirt - the logo on the left breast in bright red embroidery is a scoped rifle and below it in plain block letters:

"VOTE FROM THE ROOFTOPS"

Got the idea from Mark Penman's LAISSEZ FIREARM site (http://www.loudpipes.com/laissezfirearm/).

jmt0413
07-07-2001, 11:27
He who dies with the most toys...

Still dies.

Beaten
07-08-2001, 01:51
Black tee shirt Red letters
I'm lost please take me home with you.
It has worked more times than I thought it would.

Pelon
07-09-2001, 08:45
I have a shirt with crosshairs containing the text "Wish You Were Here"

like this, only nicer:


Wish | You
-- --
Were | Here

45owner
07-09-2001, 19:33
Pet the Giant Boner 5 cents!

(Finger pointing at crotch) He likes you.

Marijuana Pickers Union Local 420

I'm not as think as you drunk I am ociffer.

Micad
07-10-2001, 18:51
You will really have to visualize this one I saw it at the Phoenix Race track a few years ago:
Picture a typical living room
a fan siiting on a table in front of a window, next to the table, on a rug sits a vacuum cleaner. Balloons over the fan says "You Suck" over the vacuum "Blow Me"
You probalbly had to be there

bubbaturbo
07-17-2001, 16:06
"Those of you who think you know everything are very irritating to those of us who do."

[This message has been edited by bubbaturbo (edited 07-17-2001).]

carbon_15
08-01-2002, 12:24
so....
And I dress myself this way.

Sugarfoot
08-01-2002, 19:26
Observed at Daytona Beach several years go..

"I'm A Virgin"

"And this is a very old T-Shirt"...

kentley
08-01-2002, 19:50
Top line reads "Sobriety Test"
http://personal.atl.bellsouth.net/atl/k/e/kent4424/Pics/t-shirt.jpg

bobjones22
08-01-2002, 19:54
Maine isn't the end of the world, but you can see it from he'ah.

TKM
08-01-2002, 20:37
The liver is Evil, it must be punished.

zen_grasshopper
08-01-2002, 23:15
My favorite is my black t-shirt that says "I'd rather be masturbating!"


I love wearing that in public and to class. My professor's don't like it much though!! :)

aspartz
08-01-2002, 23:42
On the front:
The Earth is not my Mother
On the back
And the Government is not my Daddy

ARS

DWavs
08-02-2002, 00:01
Originally posted by zen_grasshopper
My favorite is my black t-shirt that says "I'd rather be masturbating!"


I love wearing that in public and to class. My professor's don't like it much though!! :)

hehehe.....

Alex_Knight
08-02-2002, 00:18
Originally posted by zen_grasshopper
My favorite is my black t-shirt that says "I'd rather be masturbating!"


I love wearing that in public and to class. My professor's don't like it much though!! :) ;i ;i ;i ;i ;i ;i ;i

Mauler362ndFG
08-02-2002, 12:38
One that I have:

Front "I am sitting here completely surrounded by no beer!"

Back "OH! NICE! "

;c;c;c;c

.45Ranger
08-04-2002, 11:13
Had a black t-shirt with a psychedelic peace singn and the words?
" If you remember the 60's you weren't there";c

badbilly429
08-06-2002, 14:44
i have a yellow shirt that says in black letters across the chest "dont drink pee"

Alex_Knight
08-06-2002, 14:58
I have one that says:

It's only funny until someone get's hurt ! ! !

Then it's hilarious ! ! !

YosemiteSam357
08-06-2002, 17:41
I have one from my biker days that says,

If it has t*ts or wheels
It will give you problems

I never wear it though. Really.

-- Sam

wwotw
08-07-2002, 02:57
have one that says "UNDERCOVER COPS'cop in large print on the back....although I was always asked who was I under the covers with;)

igrp
08-07-2002, 12:55
Originally posted by kentley
Top line reads "Sobriety Test"
http://personal.atl.bellsouth.net/atl/k/e/kent4424/Pics/t-shirt.jpg

I've seen an older, probably in his mid-60s, tourist-looking gentleman of Asian origin with his wife wearing one of those in Miami Beach this summer. Still wonder if they had any idea what the t-shirt was all about... ;c ;c ;c

Jerry52
08-07-2002, 19:13
9 0ut of 10 voices in my head say pull the trigger


The voices said stay home and clean your guns, but I came to work anyway

P-Ratt
08-08-2002, 11:55
What do you call a person with no fear? An ambulance

My 4yr old has, "Been there broke that!"

P-Ratt
08-08-2002, 12:01
Harley Davidson logo with the inscription, "If they made an airplane, would you fly in it?" ;M

Muzzleloader
08-09-2002, 19:48
Picture Bill Clinton wearing a tshirt with an arrow pointing down that says "I'm with stupid"

Penman
08-09-2002, 20:02
Gave my boss' wife a T-shirt that said: "My next husband will be normal"

jess33565
08-12-2002, 01:21
Arrested a guy tonight for Parole Violation. He was wearing a black shirt with white letters saying "Don't make me violate my parole."

Funny end to a crappy day.;f

jess

master tigon
08-12-2002, 10:36
this one I saw on a customer at work

"Keep staring...I just might do a trick"


this is probably the best
on the front it says "I have a drug problem"
on the back it says. "Billy and dick have a quarter bag of weed.. There's about 48 hits in the bag, and it takes dick two hits to get the munchies, and it takes billy 4 hits to get the munchies. If they eat 15 pretzles each every time they get the munchies, how many pretzles will each one eat"

Funny as hell.

master tigon
08-12-2002, 10:45
how about one I almost got.
it's a ben franklin quote "Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy"

I once saw a baby with a blue shirt with white lettering saying-"are you my daddy" lol

"I was syzophrenic but we're okay now"

worst shirt idea-"I went to---- and all I got is this stupid t-shirt"

"Take me drunk, I'm home"

just thought of a great baby shirt idea
"They say you can't put a price on life, well they're wrong, my mom sold me for 2 dime bags and a crack pipe."

I saw one many years back with a picture of two little kids naked(figures, I was in provincetown)one boy and one girl, the boy is peeing and is looking at the girl and says, "No you can't touch mine, you all-ready broke yours off"

lol

eXistenZ
07-22-2009, 14:48
"I call on the forces of the ancestors of GlockTalk. I command thee to rise and be funny once more! LIVE! LIVE AGAIN!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"

A stupid t-shirt I find funny:

http://www.tshirthell.com/shirts/products/a821/a821_bm.gif

Pancho 12
07-22-2009, 19:37
I saw one at an EasyRider show one time:

"50,000 battered women in America, and all this time I've been eating them plain."

Wrong. Very wrong. Still funny.


Good Lord, this is an old thread...

stormspotter
07-22-2009, 22:03
Insanity is heraditary, you get it from your kids.

Glock19_11
07-23-2009, 09:17
:needspics:

stormspotter
07-23-2009, 09:49
Here ya go...........




http://i84.photobucket.com/albums/k10/ema567/PR_109309.jpg

eXistenZ
07-23-2009, 14:10
http://www.tshirthell.com/shirts/products/a1234/a1234_bm.gif

http://www.tshirthell.com/shirts/products/a1190/a1190_bm.gif

http://www.tshirthell.com/shirts/products/a760/a760_bm.gif

http://www.tshirthell.com/shirts/products/a990/a990_bm.gif

http://www.tshirthell.com/shirts/products/a1268/a1268_bm.gif

eXistenZ
07-23-2009, 14:13
Baby t-shirts:

http://www.tshirthell.com/shirts/products/a1070/a1070.gif

http://www.tshirthell.com/shirts/products/a201/a201.gif

http://www.tshirthell.com/shirts/products/a884/a884.gif

http://www.tshirthell.com/shirts/products/a1044/a1044.gif

http://www.tshirthell.com/shirts/products/a515/a515.gif

pupcuss27
07-24-2009, 20:42
http://img182.imageshack.us/img182/2504/chelseetshirt.png

:rofl:

daaaveman
07-24-2009, 22:48
Bright multi-colored smear across the front. Letters read "I ran into Tammy Faye today"

RoyJ
07-25-2009, 16:01
My wife made me one for my birthday. It said:

My reality check bounced a long time ago!

kalash
07-25-2009, 21:28
"Finish your bear!
There are sober kids in India!" :)

Stop CPR
07-26-2009, 23:15
Vacationing near Sun Valley Idaho in the town of Ketchem I saw an old dude in a shirt that said “ Ketchem, Hell I can’t even find ‘em”.

Ernest Hemingway committed suicide in Ketchem. After going there I know why.

Skykevver
07-26-2009, 23:39
a girl in the grocery store is wearing one of those T-shirts that say "GUESS" across the chest. My son stops and says "what do you think, dad...implants?"

eXistenZ
07-27-2009, 13:04
"Finish your bear!
There are sober kids in India!" :)

What do bears have to do with being sober? :tongueout:

"Bear":

http://animals.nationalgeographic.com/staticfiles/NGS/Shared/StaticFiles/animals/images/primary/grizzly-bear.jpg


"Beer":

http://stuffeducatedlatinoslike.files.wordpress.com/2008/03/beer.jpg

:tongueout:

AV1911
07-27-2009, 22:09
a girl in the grocery store is wearing one of those T-shirts that say "GUESS" across the chest. My son stops and says "what do you think, dad...implants?"

:rofl::rofl::rofl:

Gun Shark
07-27-2009, 22:21
a girl in the grocery store is wearing one of those T-shirts that say "GUESS" across the chest. My son stops and says "what do you think, dad...implants?"

:rofl::rofl::rofl:

So were they?

Gun Shark
07-27-2009, 22:33
http://www.crazynfunny.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/02/funnytshirtss.jpg

http://tbn1.google.com/images?q=tbn:bSEpBdSl-6RqJM:http://www.humoroust-shirts.com/images/funnytshirts.gif

http://www.crazynfunny.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/02/funny-tshirt.jpg

http://tbn3.google.com/images?q=tbn:tDRTSSv1pmBr6M:http://www.my-funny-t-shirts.com/dont-care.jpg

http://tbn0.google.com/images?q=tbn:6E-YzWfAaBF-UM:http://image.linkinn.com/userfile/pictures_0906/Image/Funny_T_Shirts_Slogans_1.jpg

Gun Shark
07-27-2009, 22:34
http://67.199.7.46/_media/imgs/articles/a255_m15.jpg

eXistenZ
07-29-2009, 15:08
http://rlv.zcache.com/funny_tshirts-p235488075725533254qmbd_400.jpg

http://romeotees.files.wordpress.com/2009/04/t-shirts-funny9.jpg

http://tshirtgroove.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/what-would-macgyver-do-t-shirt.jpg

http://www.cheaphumor.com/files/newpiks/brainwish.jpg

http://www.shrani.si/f/1d/6y/jybIQ9I/t-shirts-funny7.jpg

pupcuss27
07-29-2009, 16:14
Mug Shot Fashion Changes...

http://img187.imageshack.us/img187/5326/mugshotfashions.jpg

PUP :rofl:

ghostrider88
07-30-2009, 09:57
Sea food joint outter banks nc called dirty dicks seafood teashirts say I GET MY CRABS FROM DIRTY DICKS

prpbmw
08-01-2009, 14:49
Picture of an AR15 on a shirt - caption is "When in doubt, shoot it out"




Another.

Picture a 500 pound guy with a shirt that says

"I beat Anorexia"

Skykevver
08-02-2009, 01:16
Originally Posted by Skykevver http://glocktalk.com/forums/images/buttons/viewpost.gif (http://glocktalk.com/forums/showthread.php?p=13455529#post13455529)
a girl in the grocery store is wearing one of those T-shirts that say "GUESS" across the chest. My son stops and says "what do you think, dad...implants?"



So were they?

Only her hairdresser, plastic surgeon, gynecologist, boyfriend, bff's, swimming coach, chiropractor, gym class, sorority sisters, credit card company, next door neighbors, and high hurdles track coach know for sure!

:wow: :wow: :wow: