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Glockdude1
11-30-2006, 17:21
"Hickbonics"

HICKBONICS The Association of Southern Schools has decided to pursue
some of the seemingly endless taxpayer dollar pipeline through
Washington designating Southern slang, or Hickbonics," as a language to
be taught in all Southern schools. A speaker of this language would be
a Hickophone. The following are excerpts from the Hickbonics/English
dictionary:


HEIDI - (noun) -Greeting.


HIRE YEW - Complete sentence. Remainder of greeting.

Usage: Heidi, Hire yew?"


BARD - (verb) - Past tense of the infinitive "to borrow."

Usage: "My brother bard my pickup truck."


JAWJUH - (noun) - The State north of Florida. Capital is Lanner.

Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck."


BAMMER - (noun) - The State west of Jawjuh. Capitol is Berminhayum.

Usage: "A tornader jes went through Bammer an' left $20,000,000 in
improvements."


MUNTS - (noun) - A calendar division.

Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck, and I ain't herd
from him in munts."


THANK - (verb) - Ability to cognitively process.

Usage: "Ah thank ah'll have a bare."


BARE - (noun) - An alcoholic beverage made of barley, hops, and yeast.

Usage: "Ah thank ah'll have a bare."


IGNERT - (adjective) - Not smart. See "Arkansas native."

Usage: "Them bammer boys sure are ignert!"


RANCH - (noun) - A tool used for tight'nin' bolts.

Usage: "I thank I left my ranch in the back of that pickup truck my
brother from Jawjuh bard a few munts ago."



ALL - (noun) - A petroleum-based lubricant.

Usage: "I sure hope my brother from Jawjuh puts all in my pickup truck."


FAR - (noun) - A conflagration.

Usage: "If my brother from Jawjuh don't change the all in my pickup
truck, that thing's gonna catch far."


TAR - (noun) - A rubber wheel.

Usage: "Gee, I hope that brother of mine from Jawjuh don't git a flat
tarin my pickup truck."


TIRE - (noun) - A tall monument.

Usage: "Lord willin' and the creek don't rise, I sure do hope to see
that Eiffel Tire in Paris sometime."


RETARD - (verb) - To stop working.

Usage: "My grampaw retard at age 65."


FAT - (noun), (verb) - a battle or combat; to engage in battle or
combat.

Usage: "You younguns keep fat'n, n' ah'm gonna whup y'uh."



RATS - (noun) - Entitled power or privilege.

Usage: "We Southerners are willin' to fat for are rats."


FARN - (adjective) - Not domestic.

Usage: "I cuddint unnerstand a wurd he sed...must be from some farn
country."



DID - (adjective) - Not alive.

Usage: "He's did, Jim."


EAR - (noun) - A colorless, odorless gas: Oxygen.

Usage: "He cain't breathe...give 'im some ear!"


BOB WAR - (noun) - A sharp, twisted cable.

Usage: "Boy, stay away from that bob war fence."


JEW HERE - (noun) and (verb) contraction.

Usage: "Jew here that my brother from Jawjuh got a job with that bob
war fence cump'ny?"


HAZE - a contraction.

Usage: "Is Bubba smart?" "Nah...haze ignert. He ain't thanked but a
minnit'n 'is laf."


SEED - (verb) - past tense of "to see".


VIEW - contraction: (verb) and pronoun.

Usage: "I ain't never seed New York City... view?"


GUBMINT - (noun) - A bureaucratic institution.

Usage: "Them gubmint boys shore is ignert."

:supergrin:

Flinter
11-30-2006, 21:46
I dun did unnerstan ever werd you jes rit.

Glockdude1
11-30-2006, 22:08
Originally posted by Flinter
I dun did unnerstan ever werd you jes rit.

I tped it reel slooooow jus fer u's.


:animlol:

Rebel_James
11-30-2006, 22:14
:laughabove:

I understood every word, but have a correction ...

It ain't all that goes in a truck .... it's erl.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v32/Rebel_James/GlockP031.jpg

shu
12-01-2006, 06:21
Or, as heard in west central texas,

"That's a owl on that owl well, owl rat."