Mafia Valentine's Day greetings [Archive] - Glock Talk


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The Pontificator
05-04-2007, 10:23
My love for you...
it came and went.
So your feet are now
in wet cement.

I'm here to fulfill
your fondest wishes --
Now that your husband
sleeps with the fishes.

Lie down with me --
It's my final offa,
Or you'll be lying
wit' Jimmy Hoffa.

I picked up this card
from a slim selection,
But that's all they offer
in witness protection.
Love, J. Doe

I've waited so long for you to be mine!
Now that Sinatra's dead, be *my* Valentine.

Be my Valentine... and we can do it execution-style.

Cinderella got her fella,
with a slipper made of glass.
So please be mine, Valentine,
or I'll have to whack your ass.

Violets are blue, roses are red.
I blew up your car -- So why ain't you dead?

The day we met, my little pet,
I knew with just one look,
You'd bear a son, and now that's done,
So shut your mouth and cook!


Youse da greatest.
Youse da best.
But you're untouchable
Like Elliot Ness.

Lust is fleeting,
True love lingers.
Be mine always
And you'll keep your fingers.

Hope da chocolates is good, but y'know,
dis ain't really what a guy's heart looks like.

Valentine, Dear, lend me a hand,
So I won't be a self-made man.

and the Number 1 Mafia Valentine's Day Greeting...

When a goon makes you die,
cuz you told him goodbye
-- that's amore!