Blondes [Archive] - Glock Talk

PDA

View Full Version : Blondes


okie
06-11-2007, 02:07
Did you bear about the two blondes that were found frozen to death in their
car at the drive-in movie theatre?
They went to see 'Closed for Winter'.

Blitzer
06-11-2007, 09:09
Careful you will get Eric started again!

eddief4
06-11-2007, 14:42
:animlol:

Ian
06-15-2007, 14:08
Now that is funny!:rofl:
Is it true?

pupcuss27
06-24-2007, 08:39
I married a Blonde.......

:hugs: :rofl:

Just told her the joke, had to explain it to her of course.

Eric doesn't like Blonde Jokes ??? :sad:

pulaskipusher
06-24-2007, 08:46
my wifes reply quote "What-What? Oh" :animlol:

Ian
06-24-2007, 12:27
:animlol:
:blondmoment:
I dunno, the true natural blondes that I have met, have always been intelligent, wonderful people. It's the fake blondes that you have to worry about

Blitzer
06-24-2007, 12:49
Originally posted by pupcuss27
I married a Blonde.......

:hugs: :rofl:

Just told her the joke, had to explain it to her of course.

Eric doesn't like Blonde Jokes ??? :sad:

Eric can tell some very mean, spiteful, horrid and totally...





















































...hilarious blond jokes! :shocked: :supergrin:

A blonde woman is driving along a country road out in rolling hills of the midwest when she sees some movement off in the distance. As she gets closer, she realizes that it is another blonde woman in a rowboat in the middle of a field rowing the boat like crazy.

She stops her car at the side of the road and gets out. She yells out to the blonde in the rowboat, "What the hell are you doing?"

The blonde in the boat, obviously flustered, yells back, "I have got to hurry up and get home in time for dinner or I will be in real trouble!"

The blonde at the side of the road is aggravated. "I can't believe this! You are out in the middle of a field in a row boat! It is blondes like you that give blondes like me a bad name! In fact, if I could swim, I would swim out there and kick your butt!"

:rofl: :animlol: :thumbsup:

Blitzer
06-24-2007, 12:55
Why did the blonde snort NutraSweet? She thought it was diet coke.

What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.

What does a smart blonde and a UFO have in common? You are always hearing about them, but you never actually see one.

Why should blondes not be given coffee breaks? Takes too long to retrain them.

What did the blonde say when she opened a box of Cheerios? "Oh look! Doughnut seeds!"

What do you call a blonde dyed brunette? Artificial intelligence.

What do you call three blondes in a freezer? Frosted Flakes.

Blitzer
06-24-2007, 12:58
q) what's a blonde's mating call?
a) ohmigod, i'm so druuuunk!

q) what's an ugly blonde's mating call?
a) [stomping foot] i saaaaaaid - i'm so DRUNK!

q) what's a brunette's mating call?
a) that blonde gone yet?

Blitzer
06-24-2007, 13:00
There were 11 people holding onto a rope that came down from a plane. Ten were blonde, and one was a brunette. They all decided that one person should get off because if they didn't then the rope would break and everyone would die.

No one could decide who should go, so finally the brunette said, "I'll get off." After a really touching speech from the brunette saying she would get off...
















































...all of the blondes started clapping. :rofl:

Blitzer
06-24-2007, 13:06
she sent me a fax with a stamp on it

she thought a quarterback was a refund

she tried to drown a fish

she tripped over a cordless phone

she spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because it said "concentrate"

she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind

she told me to meet her at the corner of "WALK" and "DON'T WALK"

if you gave her a penny for intelligence, you'd get change back

they had to burn the school down to get her out of third grade

she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept

at the bottom of the application where it says "sign here"..she put "Sagittarius"

she asked for a price check at the Dollar Store

if she spoke her mind, she'd probably be speechless

she studied for a blood test - and failed

she thought she needed a token to get on Soul Train

she sold the car for gas money

when she saw the "NC-17" (under 17 not admitted), she went home and got 16 friends

when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved

she thinks Taco Bell is where you pay your phone bill

when she took you to the airport and saw a sign that said "Airport Left" she turned around and went home

pupcuss27
06-30-2007, 08:54
A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new
dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by
saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex. Her friend said,
"Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?"
"Hell-OOOOOO," answered the blond.
"They're watch dogs!"

pupcuss27
06-30-2007, 08:57
The blonde reported for her university final examination that consists of yes/no type questions. She takes her seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes and then, in a fit of inspiration, takes out her purse, removes a coin and starts tossing the coin, marking the answers after each toss. Within half an hour she is all done, whereas the rest of the class is still sweating it out. During the last few minutes she is seen desperately throwing the coin, muttering and sweating. The moderator alarmed, approaches her and asks what is going on. I finished the exam in half an hour, but now I'm rechecking my answers."

pupcuss27
06-30-2007, 08:59
A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?" She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"

pupcuss27
06-30-2007, 09:03
A married couple was asleep, when the phone rang at 2
in the morning. The wife (undoubtedly blonde), picked
up the phone, listened a moment and said, "How should
I know, that's 200 miles from here!" and hung up.
The husband said, "Who was that?" The wife said, "I
don't know, some woman wanting to know "if the coast
is clear."