Definition of "Secure the Building"

[YosemiteSam357]

The recent "balance" thread reminded me of this one:

The definition of "Secure the Building" as used by the various branches of our Armed Forces:

Army: Lock the door, ensure there are no enemies at the perimeter.
Navy: Put a chain on the door and post an SP as sentry.
Marines: Destroy the building, and anything alive within a 100 yard perimeter.
Air Force: Obtain a year lease with an option to buy.

-- Sam

[Darkmage]

You forgot one:

Coast Guard: Lash the building to the ground using two miles of line and at least one heavy-duty chain. Both items will have a technical name that you must use instead of "line" and "chain". If you call these items by their improper name, a boat will sink.

PS - If you call one of their ships a "boat", it will sink immediately.

[MrMunster]

Originally posted by Darkmage

PS - If you call one of their ships a "boat", it will sink immediately.

And that is why they have to be at least 6' tall -- so they can keep their heads above water while they walk to shore.....;a

[master tigon]

ATF=burn the buliding and blame it on the tenants

FBI=shoot the buliding and claim it attacked.

[Steve Koski]

You guys bust me up!!!

[Citori]

Clintonian White House:

Send the wife out of town.

[master tigon]

lets see if there are any more

MMM= March around the house until it surrenders all weapons.
AA= Get the house to acknowledge it has a problem
NAMBLA= Surround building and claim it's your first amendment right to have children in there.

Jesse Ventura= Claim all unprotected houses are a crutch and are for the weak.

Terrorists= House? Those are for living, I thought you blew them up?

Peace Corps= Accidentally shoot all those who are with you and claim the operation was a complete success.

okay, now I'm done.