With all these threads about divoce...

[Daryl in Az]

I thought I'd share a couple of things that have happened to folks I know.

Believe me, when people are doing things in secret that they shouldn't, the truth is generally known...sooner or later.

My brother and I own a construction company (he more than I, since I don't do anything with it these days), and it's always been heavily involved with heavy equipment type stuff.

Anyway, we installed a new septic system for a married couple many years ago. About a year later, the guy called my brother to tell him that the system was backed up. So, we went over with a backhoe and pulled the lid off of the tank. Upon inspecting the tank, we discovered (literally) hundreds of...um...latex objects in the tank.

So, my brother proceeds to tell the guy that he shouldn't be flushing those down the toilet, since they aren't biodegradable, and will plug things up.

The guy then said "I don't use those." My brother, the ever mouthy wise-acre, told him "Well, be glad someone does! You better get someone with a pump truck to pump the tank."

We could hear the yelling and screaming as we loaded the backhoe and drove away.

A few weeks ago, my wife was at my sister's house when my sister's friend stopped by. My sister's a nurse, and her friend was having a few "symptoms". My sister told her that it sounded like she'd gotten an STD, and should go get checked out.

Well, the friend was confused. Her boyfriend is married, but swore he'd been faithful to her (except for the wife, of course). She'd in turn been faithful to him. Suddenly the light came on, and for some reason the guy was really ticked at his wife for cheating on him.

Another divorce started, with both parties proven guilty.

So folks, a word to the wise. Nothing stays secret forever. Some way, some how, the proof of guilt will show itself.

If you think about it, it gives a new twist to the scripture that says "Know the truth, and the truth shall set you free".

I really believe that if each of us in this world would stick to doing the things that we want the whole world to know we did, we'd all be much happier and live in a much better place.

Daryl

[tbhracing]

I thought I would share this- The reality of marriage. (http://www.tenetsofleykis.com/podcast/leykis101_podcast_21_reality_of_marriage.mp3) Will take a minute to load up.

[Zapfenstreich]

I really believe that if each of us in this world would stick to doing the things that we want the whole world to know we did, we'd all be much happier and live in a much better place.

Daryl

I agree with you, Daryl. Very much so.

[Atlas]

Daryl,

That is one of the most interesting and enlightening things I have read or heard in a long, long time.

I think you made the point pretty clearly that it applies to more than just fidelity in marriage and male-female relationships, and that point was not lost on my thickheaded self.

Thanks for sharing!

[dave_pro2a]

PRE-NUPs should be mandatory..

[Daryl in Az]

PRE-NUPs should be mandatory..

I disagree. They're optional, as is marriage itself, and they most times won't do a whole lot to protect you anyway.

Just my opinion, but I think sometimes there's way too much emphasis on material assets, and not enough on a marriage itself. I waited 'till I was 39 years old to get married, most ly because I never met a woman I'd REALLY trust; that is, until I met my wife. She's proven herself to me many times over, and I've no doubt about her devotion and intent in our marriage.

I know, folks have said that many times before and many have been wrong. If I am, I'll pay the price, but there really isn't another for me.

I've told my wife if she ever leaves me I want at least 5 minutes notice...

because I'm going with her! ;)

Daryl

[Glock&KimberLady]

Commitment, Communication, Compromise and their corollaries - Adultery, Abuse, Addiction.

The first three are what will make your marriage work properly. You have to be committed to stay in your marriage forever - and let your spouse know it. You have to be willing to communicate with your spouse - the good, the bad, the ugly, the dreams, the bad day at work, the silly thought about The Sarah Connor Chronicles. And you must must must compromise in marriage for it to work - you can't be the self-centered a-hole, nor can you let your spouse walk all over and make you eat dirt because you don't have enough self-esteem to maintain relative parity in power.

As far as the second three, those are the three items I consider acceptable for divorce. Cheating is a dead-bang your-ass-is-on-the-curb situation. Abuse can be mental or physical. Someone who is cruel to you constantly will kill you just as surely as someone who beats you half-senseless...they just kill you on the inside. And addiction is a case-by-case basis - an addiction to World of Warcrack can be as bad as a real crack addiction to some.

It boils down to: keep your head out of your ass, and control what YOU do, because that's all you can do anyway.

[*ASH*]

the second time i got married i had no worries over pre nup - she has more money then me lol . im in like flint :rofl::rofl:

[eingeist]

Wow.... Thanks Daryl!

[GotGlock1917]

I would just like to say "thank you" to my wife for 20 wonderful years.

It is a shame so many people choose poorly or behave poorly or just don't try.

I love you Debbie!

[Daryl in Az]

I would just like to say "thank you" to my wife for 20 wonderful years.

It is a shame so many people choose poorly or behave poorly or just don't try.

I love you Debbie!

Now see, THIS is what I really like to see.

Don't get me wrong; I feel bad for those who are unfortunate enough to face divorce. I wouldn't wish that on anyone, and I hope and pray for their well being and peace of mind.

When two people have made it work through a lot of years together though, then they really have something special.

Marriage isn't the horrible mess that it's sometimes made out to be by those with bad experiences. You get out of it what you put into it.

People tell me that making a marriage work is hard, but for me it's as easy as breathing. I love my wife with all my heart, and I try to make sure it shows in the things I do. I also know that my wife loves me the same way, because it DOES shows in the things she does.

Staying faithful is part of it, but so is having the dishes done and a nice dinner on the table when she's been hard at work all day.

It works both ways.

Daryl

[Daryl in Az]

Daryl's wife here!

You know he is right it is not work at all. The way I see it is if you are not doing right by your marriage then that would be work.
Loving someone with all your heart no matter what and showing them everyday is what makes the marriage wonderful. It is the little things such as when I am leaving for work and him telling me to "be careful" or making a surprise dinner so I dont have to figure out what to fix.

Janelle

ps I love you too Daryl

[geminicricket]

Daryl's wife here!

You know he is right it is not work at all. The way I see it is if you are not doing right by your marriage then that would be work.
Loving someone with all your heart no matter what and showing them everyday is what makes the marriage wonderful. It is the little things such as when I am leaving for work and him telling me to "be careful" or making a surprise dinner so I dont have to figure out what to fix.

Janelle

ps I love you too Daryl

You are cheating! Getyerown user name!

By the way, you and my rich sister share a name and spelling. There's not many of you around.

[BikerGoddess]

Yeah, I'm never getting a divorce... only half of what he has at the time? If I stay married, I get all of it forever...:rofl:

[Ender]

I thought I'd share a couple of things that have happened to folks I know.

Believe me, when people are doing things in secret that they shouldn't, the truth is generally known...sooner or later.

My brother and I own a construction company (he more than I, since I don't do anything with it these days), and it's always been heavily involved with heavy equipment type stuff.

Anyway, we installed a new septic system for a married couple many years ago. About a year later, the guy called my brother to tell him that the system was backed up. So, we went over with a backhoe and pulled the lid off of the tank. Upon inspecting the tank, we discovered (literally) hundreds of...um...latex objects in the tank.

So, my brother proceeds to tell the guy that he shouldn't be flushing those down the toilet, since they aren't biodegradable, and will plug things up.

The guy then said "I don't use those." My brother, the ever mouthy wise-acre, told him "Well, be glad someone does! You better get someone with a pump truck to pump the tank."

We could hear the yelling and screaming as we loaded the backhoe and drove away.

Daryl

Funny...every guy I know who does septic knows somebody who knows somebody...:whistling:

[Patricia]

Funny...every guy I know who does septic knows somebody who knows somebody...:whistling:

Exactly what I was thinking. The condoms in the septic tank story has been making the email rounds for some time. It's even on snopes.com as a "legend".

[sourdough44]

Here's one for you: A married guy has a little on the side. All is going well when he visits the GF. An X of the GF happens to be a cop. He sees the married guy's car at the GF's place & runs the plate. He calls the wife & asks if she knows where hubby is? They worked it out but now he is on a shorter leash.

[Cochese]

Here's one for you: A married guy has a little on the side. All is going well when he visits the GF. An X of the GF happens to be a cop. He sees the married guy's car at the GF's place & runs the plate. He calls the wife & asks if she knows where hubby is? They worked it out but now he is on a shorter leash.

That officer needs to get s-canned.

[Daryl in Az]

Exactly what I was thinking. The condoms in the septic tank story has been making the email rounds for some time. It's even on snopes.com as a "legend".

This one isn't a legend. It's fact. I was there, so I don't need to verify it through snopes. Believe it or not, it's up to you.

Daryl

[Britt]

Here's one for you: A married guy has a little on the side. All is going well when he visits the GF. An X of the GF happens to be a cop. He sees the married guy's car at the GF's place & runs the plate. He calls the wife & asks if she knows where hubby is? They worked it out but now he is on a shorter leash.

What a dick cop.