Cfotd - 9.26.08

[Fernman]

Welcome to the first of many editions of the Cluster **** of the Day.

Last night. Called to a domestic... its not serious, lots of *****ing, she's waaaaaaaaaaaasted, won't leave (she has a ride waiting outside). After she gets beligerent, I hook her up - and off she goes.

Equally idiotic friend shows up at PD to tell us we're fascist JBT's (no **** right?). After dropping off Biotch #1 I return to PD only to see this idiot leaving, driving, and I am pretty sure she is tanked. Follow her shortly, she is all over the place, she gets hooked up and blows a 0.19

She says she left her 13 and 8 y/o's at home and they don't know she's gone, so we call estranged husband to pick up. He pulls up smelling like a brewery, and blows a 0.14.

Friend shows up to take them, she is on bond for a felony charge involving a juvenile and has a bond restriction on contact with kiddos.

Boyfriend finally shows, he's a little stoned Sgt. thinks, but we've been working this one series of Cluster **** since 2000 (it is 0500 at this time).

*sigh*

I also went 4 for 4 with arrestee's either pissing or ****ting in my back seat. Thank God for hose out half cages.

[TheeBadOne]

Did you get a number? http://i38.tinypic.com/k1ugko.gif

[Hack]

So, not a sane one in the bunch you were dealing with. That makes for a busy night.

[Pepper45]

Last night was a series of CF's, not just one neat one. I almost think I'd have rather had the single neat one, with multiple arrests.

[9L82]

I had the all-time best suicide attempt last night. Guy overdoses on Xanax, gets into his car and plows into a tree, knocking down power lines. Dead yet?....oh no. He then slices his wrists. Damn, still alive. He then stabs himself repeatedly in the gut...starting to look invincible. He then exits the car and grabs what he thinks are high tension power lines and puts them in his mouth.......too bad he grabbed the cable lines.

Gotta suck when life seems so bad that you have to end it, then you can't.

[PuroMexicano]

holly moly!!! what a dumbass that can't even kill himself!!!

[9L82]

Now, on top of all the crap he had on his back....he gets a bunch of new charges!!!

[Fernman]

That's awesome! i had a wrist slicer a few weeks back, figuring it was bs, I wasn't too concerned, then he moved the compress, and arterial spray smacked the 10 ft. ceiling. lol

[9L82]

I had the all-time best suicide attempt last night. Guy overdoses on Xanax, gets into his car and plows into a tree, knocking down power lines. Dead yet?....oh no. He then slices his wrists. Damn, still alive. He then stabs himself repeatedly in the gut...starting to look invincible. He then exits the car and grabs what he thinks are high tension power lines and puts them in his mouth.......too bad he grabbed the cable lines.

Gotta suck when life seems so bad that you have to end it, then you can't.

Oh yeah, forgot to mention that my guys tazed him too....bad night

[WiskyT]

You should by a cap and ball revolver at walmart, cash, while wearing a disguise. Load it, wipe it down, leave it on his door step, ring the bell and run away. Maybe a pictograph for instructions like we used for the Liberator pistol...

[9L82]

I am thinking of holding a class for all these losers

[Hack]

You should by a cap and ball revolver at walmart, cash, while wearing a disguise. Load it, wipe it down, leave it on his door step, ring the bell and run away. Maybe a pictograph for instructions like we used for the Liberator pistol...

Or, like my Major asked me at my first suicide, "Did you finally teach him how to tie the knot?"

[SPDSNYPR]

I had the all-time best suicide attempt last night. Guy overdoses on Xanax, gets into his car and plows into a tree, knocking down power lines. Dead yet?....oh no. He then slices his wrists. Damn, still alive. He then stabs himself repeatedly in the gut...starting to look invincible. He then exits the car and grabs what he thinks are high tension power lines and puts them in his mouth.......too bad he grabbed the cable lines.

Gotta suck when life seems so bad that you have to end it, then you can't.

Now, on top of all the crap he had on his back....he gets a bunch of new charges!!!

Oh yeah, forgot to mention that my guys tazed him too....bad night


I am thinking of holding a class for all these losers

Awesome. :number1:

[DoogieHowser]

Damn Fern! Hope life gets better!

[Fernman]

Damn Fern! Hope life gets better!

:supergrin: it has

Any word from LPD?

[DoogieHowser]

:supergrin: it has

Any word from LPD?


I said screw it, tired of being a number. We have some guys that have received possible hire paperwork and it's been 6 months since the've heard anything.

I'm just pretty dissapointed with everything at the department, so I'm seriously thinking about going back to northern NC instead once Sarah's done with her undergrad. IDK man, rough decisions eh? I need to give you a call and see how your doing sometime, do you happen to have text? Sometimes it's easier that way on duty you know?

[Fernman]

I said screw it, tired of being a number. We have some guys that have received possible hire paperwork and it's been 6 months since the've heard anything.

I'm just pretty dissapointed with everything at the department, so I'm seriously thinking about going back to northern NC instead once Sarah's done with her undergrad. IDK man, rough decisions eh? I need to give you a call and see how your doing sometime, do you happen to have text? Sometimes it's easier that way on duty you know?

PMed.