This actually is a more important question than it first seems.
A fully honest answer to this question should come before even buying your first gun for self defense.
It is more important than most anything else in self defense. If you're not willing to harm another, will you even slap them? Let alone anything further.
Many, many people with less than zero training (they've seen movies/TV) have sucessfully defended themselves because they made the decision to use violence if it was needed beforehand.
Honestly making the decision is more important than owning or training with a weapon.
Think for yourself.