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Old 08-05-2012, 14:38   #15841
countrygun
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Originally Posted by ChuteTheMall View Post
I can do that for you wholesale.

No, no no. for once in our lives, since we are "rechanneling" as it were, our own funds, we WANT to pay retail. More to write off. Besides it attracts less attention if you pay market price than if you keep coming up with deals.
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Old 08-05-2012, 17:17   #15842
samurairabbi
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A's & P's........

wan't that a supermarket chain ??
Excellent memory, Unkle. I too remember the A&P supermarket chain. My parents could remember when the full name was Atlantic & Pacific Tea Company.

On the other hand ... T&A is something completely different!
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Old 08-05-2012, 17:52   #15843
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Why is it that Doctors and Lawyers call it a "Practice"? ...

Shadow, good Sir, us accountants refer to it as "practicing accounting" too. We keep practicing until the numbers come out like we want them to.

SR would know a thing or two about that over in Dungeon Finance. He is truly a professional practitioner. Get enough N' Sweats in him and he might "talk a little shop," so to speak. Sometime when he is appropriately lubricated (now is probably a good time most likely), ask him how he consistently manages to "hit the numbers."
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Old 08-05-2012, 18:09   #15844
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Shadow, good Sir, us accountants refer to it as "practicing accounting" too. We keep practicing until the numbers come out like we want them to.

SR would know a thing or two about that over in Dungeon Finance. He is truly a professional practitioner. Get enough N' Sweats in him and he might "talk a little shop," so to speak. Sometime when he is appropriately lubricated (now is probably a good time most likely), ask him how he consistently manages to "hit the numbers."
Actually, Tater, we don't "hit" the numbers; we SEDUCE them! I will show my age with this one-liner about "aggressive" accounting: Write off that loss with the help of Touche Ross.

Appropriate lubrication is not really necessary. I prefer to be superbly coherent when dispensing instruction on my embezzleme ... Whoops! ... on my precisely meaningful ... accounting technique. It is vital that my subordinates be as insightful as I am; after all, I like to take vacations, too!
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Old 08-05-2012, 19:35   #15845
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Actually, Tater, we don't "hit" the numbers; we SEDUCE them! I will show my age with this one-liner about "aggressive" accounting: Write off that loss with the help of Touche Ross.

Appropriate lubrication is not really necessary. I prefer to be superbly coherent when dispensing instruction on my embezzleme ... Whoops! ... on my precisely meaningful ... accounting technique. It is vital that my subordinates be as insightful as I am; after all, I like to take vacations, too!
I must admit that I am lost me on "Touche Ross." Never met the guy. Was he good with numbers too?

RE: your vacation -- just leave us your rubber stamp and a fresh ink pad. We'll cover for ya.
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Old 08-05-2012, 19:43   #15846
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Actually, Tater, we don't "hit" the numbers; we SEDUCE them! .....Appropriate lubrication is not really necessary.
There's a fine line between seduction and hitting, and lubrication is more useful for the former than the latter.
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Old 08-05-2012, 19:46   #15847
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I must admit that I am lost me on "Touche Ross." Never met the guy. Was he good with numbers too?

RE: your vacation -- just leave us your rubber stamp and a fresh ink pad. We'll cover for ya.
In the eighties, Touche Ross was one of the "Big 8" accounting firms, and rumor had it, the most aggressively creative in masking bad news for its clients. The firm later merged with Deloitte Haskins & Sells, creating the current Deloite & Touche.
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Old 08-05-2012, 20:01   #15848
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Shadow, good Sir, us accountants refer to it as "practicing accounting" too. We keep practicing until the numbers come out like we want them to.

SR would know a thing or two about that over in Dungeon Finance. He is truly a professional practitioner. Get enough N' Sweats in him and he might "talk a little shop," so to speak. Sometime when he is appropriately lubricated (now is probably a good time most likely), ask him how he consistently manages to "hit the numbers."
Well if this is the case the Dungeon Finance accountants may need to practice my method of doing taxes...You work them backwards! You decide how much you want [$$$] back then work said numbers with a little practice and arrive at the best numbers to achieve your desired results! You may be familure with part of this method referred to a Fudging!
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Old 08-05-2012, 20:12   #15849
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Well if this is the case the Dungeon Finance accountants may need to practice my method of doing taxes...You work them backwards! You decide how much you want [$$$] back then work said numbers with a little practice and arrive at the best numbers to achieve your desired results! You may be familure with part of this method referred to a Fudging!
My mistake. I thought "fudging" was what happened inside your trousers when the IRS man busts you while seducing the numbers.
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Old 08-05-2012, 20:19   #15850
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How are those Packers doing?
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Old 08-05-2012, 20:20   #15851
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MOVED to Page 635

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Old 08-05-2012, 21:56   #15852
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Uncle has the system figured out at this point.....
My new accountant(last one died, had to replace him!) worked for the I.R.S. for over 35 years before he retired. He got bored w/retirement & started an accounting firm. He is well versed in various methods & has proven QUITE adept in his new field of endeavor.
My son has been using him for his business for several years....profitably. Not to say that son Michael is cheap, but he was born with a yamakle tattoed on his head !
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Old 08-06-2012, 20:17   #15853
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You work them backwards! You decide how much you want [$$$] back then work said numbers with a little practice and arrive at the best numbers to achieve your desired results!
Your method has ONE possible limitation: on the occasions we want it ALL, there is no need to work BACK to determine how to achieved your desired results.
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Old 08-06-2012, 20:29   #15854
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All I want to do is be able to deduct 125% of what I earn per year.
I'm not greedy !


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Old 08-06-2012, 20:40   #15855
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All I want to do is be able to deduct 125% of what I earn per year.
I'm not greedy !

uncle
Unkle, you may be too limited in your thinking. If you handle things correctly under the Earned Income Tax Credit structure, then not only will you NOT pay any taxes, but also the government would actually give YOU money!
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Old 08-06-2012, 20:44   #15856
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If they do that, won't I have to go into farming ?


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Old 08-06-2012, 20:52   #15857
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If they do that, won't I have to go into farming ?

uncle
Not necessarily; the Earned Income Tax Credit is a lovely scam ... whoops! ... I mean, a precisely targeted entitlement program ... that does not require you to do farming. The farming subsidies, though, may have been the prototype for the EITC.

And anyway, being a "Gentleman Farmer" ain't so bad.
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Old 08-06-2012, 22:52   #15858
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Remember, George Washington was a very wealthy gentleman farmer.....


Yet he was so cash-poor that he had to borrow money for traveling expenses to attend his own Inaguration !
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Old 08-07-2012, 00:17   #15859
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Before you become a gentleman farmer, you need to do a financial analysis on what not to grow. The government is far more generous with certain subsidies, so it would be foolish to not grow the wrong crops.
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Old 08-07-2012, 20:16   #15860
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Unkle, you may be too limited in your thinking. If you handle things correctly under the Earned Income Tax Credit structure, then not only will you NOT pay any taxes, but also the government would actually give YOU money!
That is why it is so important to properly "Fudge"...I sorry I meant working backwards even if you want 125% back, to have the numbers look honest and straight forward! This works with any and all credits because the numbers look and work correctly.

This brings us to the "farming subsidies", this can be also refered to as a "cash crop" Gov pays you not to plant certain crops, but then you plant something like medical Cannabis on public land, then have the illegal immigrants work the fields, earning yet another deduction for special employment ops, taking the full advantage because certain percentage crop loss for personal gains and then the medical research grants aspect while claiming squaters rights to full ownership of the public lands without capital gains taxes.
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