The following are ways to determine whether a truck is company owned:
1. Company trucks travel faster in all gears.
2. They accelerate much faster than personal trucks, leaving tire marks on
3. They enjoy a much shorter braking distance, leaving more tire marks.
4. They can take bumps at twice the speed of private trucks.
5. Company trucks normally require oil changes at 100,000 mile intervals.
6. Their floors are shaped like ash trays, and accommodate milk cartons, coke
bottles, leftover food, and paper wrappers.
7. They can be driven 100 miles or more with the oil pressure light flashing.
8. They are adapted to allow the transmission to be shifted into reverse while
going forward at 20 mph.
9. Their tire walls are designed for bumping into and over curbs.
10. Unusual and alarming engine noises are easily eliminated by turning the
radio volume up.
11. Company trucks are not designed to be washed or waxed or to retain
12. All company trucks have many dents in the body, inflicted by a
mysterious person called "not me".
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