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Old 06-12-2011, 14:55   #1
Dalton Wayne
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Serious Question

30 years ago I sent in a large donation to a California church, in return they made me an ordained minister, in good standing now I have led some church services a few.
My son is getting married here in Florida in Sept, he wants me to do the service, come to find out Florida does recognize my license, I don't really want to do it but may have to if he insist, I've never done a wedding before
Need opinions
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Old 06-12-2011, 15:09   #2
Vic Hays
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Originally Posted by Dalton Wayne View Post
30 years ago I sent in a large donation to a California church, in return they made me an ordained minister, in good standing now I have led some church services a few.
My son is getting married here in Florida in Sept, he wants me to do the service, come to find out Florida does recognize my license, I don't really want to do it but may have to if he insist, I've never done a wedding before
Need opinions
Go for it if you desire. It is not the ceremony that joins people together, it is God. The ceremony is a public commitment to each other. If you need a format, do some research and maybe attend a wedding to get some ideas. Ask your son and fiance what they would like done.
Best wishes to you and yours.
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Old 06-12-2011, 15:13   #3
steveksux
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What better use could you make of that license? I'd do it.

Are you hesitant because you want to do the traditional role of father of the groom, or because you don't feel like that route makes you a "real" minister?

Randy
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Old 06-12-2011, 15:16   #4
lwbfl
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I thought being a minister had to do with ordination, education or something of the sort. Didn't know you could buy your way in. What religion or denomination is on your paper?
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Old 06-12-2011, 15:30   #5
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yea I sent the ten bucks in to and got ordained too and the lic you get is good all over the world as long as the wedding lic is reg with the state thats all that counts

mine is the divine church of cal.

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Old 06-12-2011, 15:42   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dalton Wayne View Post
30 years ago I sent in a large donation to a California church, in return they made me an ordained minister, in good standing now I have led some church services a few.
My son is getting married here in Florida in Sept, he wants me to do the service, come to find out Florida does recognize my license, I don't really want to do it but may have to if he insist, I've never done a wedding before
Need opinions
I would suggest pointing out that you would prefer being able to enjoy the wedding as father of the groom rather than being tied up having to officiate the ceremony.

Or perhaps you could convince your daughter-in-law-to-be to convince your son that never-performed-a-wedding-Dad is not the best option to perform their dream wedding.

Good luck.
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Old 06-12-2011, 15:46   #7
Dalton Wayne
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My license has the state seal, also there will be a notary there to make it all legal
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Old 06-12-2011, 17:08   #8
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Originally Posted by barstoolguru View Post
yea I sent the ten bucks in to and got ordained too and the lic you get is good all over the world as long as the wedding lic is reg with the state thats all that counts

mine is the divine church of cal.
thats awsome. its like weding crashers but you have an excuse to be there!
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Old 06-12-2011, 17:13   #9
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Why didn't I think of that, instead I wasted years in college, seminary and that pesky ordination procedure.....coulda just mailed a check.

DW...just do it, it's a lot of fun...especially when it involves family!
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Old 06-12-2011, 21:52   #10
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My license has the state seal, also there will be a notary there to make it all legal
If the notary is there, no one else is needed to make it legal.
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Old 06-25-2011, 02:32   #11
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If the notary is there, no one else is needed to make it legal.
In Florida, this ^^^, and as far as officiating, AG's post (#6) makes sense, but an ordained minister is what they wanted... correct?

Good luck Hoss.
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Old 06-25-2011, 10:58   #12
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What better use could you make of that license? I'd do it.

Are you hesitant because you want to do the traditional role of father of the groom, or because you don't feel like that route makes you a "real" minister?

Randy
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dalton Wayne View Post
My license has the state seal, also there will be a notary there to make it all legal
So you're 100% legit and legal.

Why wouldn't you do it?

I do want to make clear I was not being insulting when I asked about if you feel like a "real" minister. I was thinking that deep down you didn't feel equivalent to a traditionally ordained minister because of how you got the license, rather than through years of study in some mainstream ordination program at a seminary.

I think it boils down to a few things. Do your kids know about your being a minister, was it their idea to have you officiate? Great, do it...

Has that ordination been taken seriously all these years, or has it been the basis of teasing over the years due to the way you got it? Did someone ELSE bring up the idea besides the bride and groom? And you're afraid they don't want to say no and hurt your feelings? Are you afraid the brides family will have a problem with it, not take you seriously, not feel its "official" with you performing the ceremony? Then don't do it.

The bottom line is its their wedding, if they want you to do it, I absolutely would do it, its a very rare and special treat for all of you in that case.

If they're more serious about religion, and you suspect they aren't crazy about the idea, would prefer a traditional minister, and just don't want to hurt your feelings, you should make up an excuse about preferring to be the father of the groom, or can't have the minister involved in the bachelor party, and suggest they get a traditional minister.

That's how I'd approach it, but I'd hesitate to tell anyone what to do in this case, only you know the dynamics of your situation, the personalities involved, all stuff crucial to the decision that we can't possibly be aware of from a few posts.

Congrats and best wishes either way, it's a great occasion either way.

Randy
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