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Old 02-20-2003, 12:09   #1
lethal tupperwa
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Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Virginia
Posts: 11,332


Things You Would Never Know Without the Movies:

-It is always possible to park directly outside any building you are visiting.

-A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.

-If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.

-Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communication systems of any invading alien civilization.

-It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts - your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.

-When a person is knocked unconscious by a blow to the head, they will never suffer a concussion or brain damage.

-No one involved in a car chase, hijacking, explosion, volcanic eruption or alien invasion will ever go into shock.

-Police Departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.

-When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.

-You can always find a chainsaw when you need one. -Any lock can be picked by a credit card or a paper clip in seconds, unless it's the door to a burning building with a child trapped inside.

-An electric fence, powerful enough to kill a dinosaur will cause no lasting damage to an eight year old child.

-Television news bulletins usually contain a story that affects you personally at that precise moment you turn the television on.
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Old 02-21-2003, 14:40   #2
Hank Hill
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Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Born in Texas, currently in occupie
Posts: 441
Additions

-- Everyone uses a Macintosh.

-- All children play soccer (but no other sports)
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OK, then how about if I just kick your ass?

I don't understand why people oppose gun control. I mean, if you can't control your gun, how can you hit the lowlife you're shooting at?

To those who have fought to defend it, freedom has a taste the protected will never know.
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