GlockTalk.com
Home Forums Classifieds Blogs Today's Posts Search Social Groups



  
SIGN-UP
Notices

Glock Talk
Welcome To The Glock Talk Forums.
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 10-09-2012, 07:06   #1
frizz
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 1,670
Divorce

I'm not going to throw my personal details out, but this may be in my near future.


A lot of it depends on how a conversation I'll be having with her today goes. I don't want this, but there are some things that just can't work.

This is a big part of why I've been jerky (or extra jerky) as of late. No excuse, but please consider it.
frizz is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 08:55   #2
FiremanMike
Way too busy
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Central Ohio
Posts: 3,007
Very sorry to hear that. Just remember, in sickness and in health, good times and bad.. You should fight to your core for your marriage. Not judging, just trying to encourage you.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by ateamer
They made bad choices and expect us to pay the price? I don't think so, Tim.
FiremanMike is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 09:03   #3
Glock30Eric
.45 ACP
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Southern Maryland
Posts: 3,364
Divorce is not worth it. Try save your marriage and have both parties to give their shares into the marriage.
Glock30Eric is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 09:21   #4
scccdoc
Senior Member
 
scccdoc's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 1,390
I was divorced about 8 years ago, though I begged my wife to understand our differences and work on them including counseling. She was content with our "separate" lives while we were married, I wasn't. I divorced her. After 3 years, we came to an understanding and we have been remarried for 5 years now. Do everything in your power to stay married, in the end there is less pain.As my father used to say "It takes two to make a bargain" I wish you the best.............DOC
scccdoc is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 09:27   #5
rockapede
Senior Member
 
rockapede's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 1,269
Quote:
Originally Posted by frizz View Post
I'm not going to throw my personal details out, but this may be in my near future.


A lot of it depends on how a conversation I'll be having with her today goes. I don't want this, but there are some things that just can't work.

This is a big part of why I've been jerky (or extra jerky) as of late. No excuse, but please consider it.
Maybe log out from here and "log in" at home?
__________________
“Do you like being a cop?"
"I love it, when it doesn't suck, sir.”

-Edward Conlon
rockapede is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 09:30   #6
PaulMason
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 1,513
Quote:
Originally Posted by frizz View Post
I'm not going to throw my personal details out, but this may be in my near future.


A lot of it depends on how a conversation I'll be having with her today goes. I don't want this, but there are some things that just can't work.

This is a big part of why I've been jerky (or extra jerky) as of late. No excuse, but please consider it.
Children?

What are the big issues/stumbling blocks to getting out?

Short answer- marriage isn't a suicide pact - get it over and done with ASAP and out of your life. Don't sweat the small stuff. Don't let it fester, it only gets worse.

Last edited by PaulMason; 10-09-2012 at 09:32..
PaulMason is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 09:40   #7
PrecisionRifleman
Senior Member
 
PrecisionRifleman's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 1,280
Its cheaper to keep them. Make it work. If no kids are involved and its just not working, and you were wise enough to get a prenup. then end it. Run a cost benefit analysis and then you will know your options.

Outdoor Hub mobile, the outdoor information engine
__________________
PrecisionRifleman

G20SF
Gen4 G23
PrecisionRifleman is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 09:47   #8
Chesafreak
Senior Member
 
Chesafreak's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Chesapeake, VA
Posts: 1,633
Quote:
Originally Posted by PrecisionRifleman View Post
Its cheaper to keep them.
Not in every case. Even after paying child support and alimony, I have hundreds left over after bills every month. When I was married, I was broke just days after every payday and we bounced checks just before payday as well. I survived 21 years of that before I threw in the towel.
Chesafreak is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 10:07   #9
frizz
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 1,670
Thank you all for the kind words of support. I have had one divorce, and it nearly killed me.

I do want to save this. We have no kids, and we met and married in our 30s.
frizz is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 10:36   #10
jeepinbandit
Sgt. USMC
 
jeepinbandit's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: NAS Fort Worth JRB
Posts: 449
Send a message via Yahoo to jeepinbandit
I was married once. Screw that noise I've never been happier and will not be getting married again.

Grab ahold of that yellow and black loop and pull my friend.

Cop Talk
__________________
Glock 17 (Dad's old duty sidearm)
And some other stuff
jeepinbandit is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 10:41   #11
frizz
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 1,670
Quote:
Originally Posted by jeepinbandit View Post
I was married once. Screw that noise I've never been happier and will not be getting married again.

Grab ahold of that yellow and black loop and pull my friend.
To each his own. Don't forget that ejection seats usually cause injuries. Even the best outcomes leave the aviator about an inch shorter!
frizz is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 10:42   #12
frizz
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 1,670
Quote:
Originally Posted by rockapede View Post
Maybe log out from here and "log in" at home?
Astute observation, but it is actually the other way around.
frizz is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 10:50   #13
PaulMason
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 1,513
Quote:
Originally Posted by frizz View Post
To each his own. Don't forget that ejection seats usually cause injuries. Even the best outcomes leave the aviator about an inch shorter!
Certain death (stay in the plane) versus a chance for life and happiness?

Gee, let me think about that one.
PaulMason is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 11:02   #14
frizz
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 1,670
Quote:
Originally Posted by PaulMason View Post
Certain death (stay in the plane) versus a chance for life and happiness?

Gee, let me think about that one.
Let me clarify. Ejection has its own risks, so you have to weigh the options. By way of metaphor, my engine is wonky, and an airport is in range. My rudder and elevators aren't jammed from a SAM hit.
frizz is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 11:25   #15
Beware Owner
NOT a victim.
 
Beware Owner's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 9,143
Sometimes separation makes the decision easier to come about to.
__________________
Free men have arms; slaves do not. Tyrants mistrust the people, hence they deprive them of arms.
Criminals for Gun Control
Myth: Gun Control Reduces Crime
Homegrown Terrorism
Beware Owner is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 11:29   #16
scccdoc
Senior Member
 
scccdoc's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 1,390
Growing old by myself is not very appealing. Besides, who's gonna feed the cat? DOC
scccdoc is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 13:51   #17
collim1
Shower Time!
 
collim1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: USA
Posts: 9,979
I have a co-worker and close friend in the same boat. They have two small children and an a teenage step-daughter. They are both good people, just cant work it out. Neither one could afford the home they live in on ther individual salary, and my buddy would be beaten to death on child support and alimony.

I am begging him to stick it out, but he is ready to give up.

Luckily me and my wife have a good relationship despite the job. I was doing this when we met so we didn't have the stress of a career change into LE.
collim1 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 14:02   #18
PaulMason
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 1,513
Quote:
Originally Posted by scccdoc View Post
Growing old by myself is not very appealing. Besides, who's gonna feed the cat? DOC
Get a Monkey.

Cop Talk

Last edited by PaulMason; 10-09-2012 at 14:03..
PaulMason is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 14:06   #19
PaulMason
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 1,513
Quote:
Originally Posted by frizz View Post
Let me clarify. Ejection has its own risks, so you have to weigh the options. By way of metaphor, my engine is wonky, and an airport is in range. My rudder and elevators aren't jammed from a SAM hit.
OK. I still say, eject and don't get in another plane.

More then 50% of first marriages end in divorce.

Second marriage 60%

http://www.divorcerate.org/
PaulMason is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 14:10   #20
Beware Owner
NOT a victim.
 
Beware Owner's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 9,143
Try separating for a little bit, it helps.
__________________
Free men have arms; slaves do not. Tyrants mistrust the people, hence they deprive them of arms.
Criminals for Gun Control
Myth: Gun Control Reduces Crime
Homegrown Terrorism
Beware Owner is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 14:50   #21
scccdoc
Senior Member
 
scccdoc's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 1,390
Quote:
Originally Posted by PaulMason View Post
Get a Monkey.

Cop Talk
Beginning to understand why your relationships don't work
scccdoc is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 15:13   #22
cowboywannabe
you savvy?
 
cowboywannabe's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: on a planet near you
Posts: 20,582
sometimes you have to cut your loses....knowing if things have gone too far will help with that decision. somethings can not be gotten over.
__________________
with Sarah Jane, Leela, Romana, Nyssa, and Tegan.

Facts are no match against enthusiasm and ignorance...
cowboywannabe is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 15:14   #23
Glock Holliday
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Pacific Northwest
Posts: 292
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chesafreak View Post
Not in every case. Even after paying child support and alimony, I have hundreds left over after bills every month. When I was married, I was broke just days after every payday and we bounced checks just before payday as well. I survived 21 years of that before I threw in the towel.
I've been there a couple times. I think I took put up with more crap off of the second one because I knew how painful (and expensive) another divorce would be but after 20 years or so of a declining relationship I threw in the towel too. In retrospect the only real regret I have is not divorcing her sooner.
__________________
NRA Benefactor Member

Last edited by Glock Holliday; 10-09-2012 at 18:14..
Glock Holliday is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 15:24   #24
cowboywannabe
you savvy?
 
cowboywannabe's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: on a planet near you
Posts: 20,582
life is too short to waste it with somebody who doesnt adore you.
__________________
with Sarah Jane, Leela, Romana, Nyssa, and Tegan.

Facts are no match against enthusiasm and ignorance...
cowboywannabe is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-09-2012, 15:27   #25
janice6
Platinum Membership
NRA
 
janice6's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: minnesota
Posts: 17,340


Didn't see if you had kids.

My father and mother were divorced when I was 12. After listening to the night long fights and cold treatments during the days, the distrust and suspicion, I think the divorce for my parents was the right thing. My father was great to us kids after the divorce, but he was hell for my mother to live with while married.

Maybe you have a case, only you know.
__________________
janice6

"Peace is that brief, glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading". Anonymous

Earp: Not everyone who knows you hates you.
DOC: I know it ain't always easy bein' my friend....but I'll BE THERE when you need me.
janice6 is online now   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump




All times are GMT -6. The time now is 19:52.



Homepage
FAQ
Forums
Calendar
Advertise
Gallery
GT Wiki
GT Blogs
Social Groups
Classifieds


Users Currently Online: 1,503
474 Members
1,029 Guests

Most users ever online: 2,244
Nov 11, 2013 at 11:42