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Old 10-12-2012, 23:52   #1
JW1178
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Brats

Why are some parents raising their kids to be brats? It seems there is this "let them be children and do as they please" mentality where the children are in charge, which results in a brat. It seems they expect to get what they want and will not take no for an answer. They know that if they scream loud enough, long enough, they will get what they want. So when someone finally draws the line, they get into more extreme measures to get what they want. These are not what I would consider happy children, they fuss all the time and when they get what they want, there is a very brief moment of satisfaction followed by them looking for something else they want. It seems they are always frustrated and that is because they are never satisfied. It seems they go from bursts of being happy, to bursts of anger or sadness very quickly. Kind of like they are bi-polar, or manic. They aren't, but they are behaving like this. I'm no Dr, but I do believe that some mental disorders are learned disorders. They learned to be that way and it's so embedded in their brains it's the only way they know.

Case in point: I know of a few like this, but I will give one example. My fiance's friend. Single mom, dad not around. Her little boy is 3, still in diapers, trip-trapping around with a passifier in his mouth all the time. What I mean by trip-trapping is the jagged shaky way toddlers who are just learning to walk. Needless to say, he is developmentally behind. He still can't speak in sentences. Very much speaks a baby language. We are over there having dinner. She makes him some mac and cheese because she knows he won't eat what we are having. He becomes very fussy because he wants a plate of what we are having. So she makes him a plate. He pokes at it but then refuses it, became rather angry that it wasn't what he wanted. She put the mac and cheese back in front of him and he freaked like she was trying to kill him. He wanted spegetti-oh's, so she makes if for him. He was delighted to get the speghetti-oh's but barely tasted it. He wants it on the coffee table, on the edge so he can play with his trucks and trains. When we move it from the edge, he became very upset by this. He wants it on the edge, where he can spill it. He then tried to throw it. He won't eat a meal. However, as the evening went by, he wanted to snack constantly. He wants crackers and treats for a constant diet. It's getting later in the evening and he is very tired, so he's even more fussy, but he wants to stay up, so he won't go to bed. It seems as though when he's happy, he's over-exuberantly happy, screaming and carrying on over what he likes, but otherwise, he's alway whining, fussing, and throwing fits. It seems all his mother does is try to cottle him and make him happy. However, I wouldn't say he is a happy kid. He is a very frustrated child. Not very pleasant to be around. I would not go into public with them. Absolutely not.

I know of about three other children like this, single mom's raising a boy with no dad around. These children have no structure in their lives. No bedtimes, no meal times, no diet plan, just whatever, whenever they want.

Then on the other hand, I have a few friends where they are a couple. Their children eat what is put on the table in front of them. They are told no. They have a bed time. They are punished when they mis behave. I see a three year old that will walk up to you, shake your hand, and hold a conversation with you. A childish one, but a conversation. He only wears pull ups to bed. He is a very happy kid to say the least. Of course he whines and fusses sometimes but it's not very much, not a long time, and he knows better than to go to extremes. This child, and a few other children like him, have a lot of structure in their lives. Needless to say, they are much further ahead in developement.

I am sure as time goes by, these reflections will carry on to adult hood. The bratty kid will probably end up at some future occupy movement upset because he thinks others should take care of him and angry because the world won't change for him. Probably will have mental disorders such as bi-polar or manic depressive that will make him unable to succeed. The other child will probably be a business man telling the bratty one to get off his property.
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Old 10-13-2012, 00:05   #2
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Oh.

I was going to suggest boiling in beer with onions and peppers for 20 minutes, and then tossing on the grill for a few minutes to crisp up the skins…..


sorry. wrong thread.

don't do that to the brats you've referred to.
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Old 10-13-2012, 00:38   #3
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Too many words.
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Old 10-13-2012, 01:17   #4
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Oh.

I was going to suggest boiling in beer with onions and peppers for 20 minutes, and then tossing on the grill for a few minutes to crisp up the skins…..

Same here, but then I saw a whole bunch of text and decided it was too much to read.

I too put brats in beer. Something like this: http://www.foodnetwork.com/beer-brats/video/index.html
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Old 10-13-2012, 04:02   #5
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I have a friends who's 4 year old son is like this. Honestly it can be embarrassing in public if I am out with them to the point I will wonder off and make out I don't know them as the other people in the area are staring at them and they are completely oblivious to it. The kid eats what he wants when he wants it, doesn't go to bed even if the parents are already in bed until he is ready. He will scream and throw tantrums and even hit people until he gets what he wants because in the end the parents will give in to him to stop the screaming. If you try and bring this behavior up with him there response is "He is crazy" while laughing like this is normal behavior. If I acted like this at his age my parents would have beat the S**t out of me.

Last edited by Badger54; 10-13-2012 at 04:02..
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Old 10-13-2012, 04:15   #6
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todays youth is the "entitlement" generation........couple that with a lot of parents cannot say "NO" to their kid and you have the making of a spoiled-brat....

todays kids that are ten years old have laptops, iphones, cable, internet, playstation 3, designer clothes, spending accounts and a pot-of-gold to go with it........

when i was growing up (80's child) i had ONE thing to play with: OUTSIDE!!!!!
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Old 10-13-2012, 04:30   #7
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Oh.

I was going to suggest boiling in beer with onions and peppers for 20 minutes, and then tossing on the grill for a few minutes to crisp up the skins…..


sorry. wrong thread.

don't do that to the brats you've referred to.
Well said!
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Old 10-13-2012, 04:31   #8
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Originally Posted by Beretta92guy View Post
todays youth is the "entitlement" generation........couple that with a lot of parents cannot say "NO" to their kid and you have the making of a spoiled-brat....

todays kids that are ten years old have laptops, iphones, cable, internet, playstation 3, designer clothes, spending accounts and a pot-of-gold to go with it........

when i was growing up (80's child) i had ONE thing to play with: OUTSIDE!!!!!
We didn't have laptops, iphones, cable, internet, playstation 3, designer clothes, spending accounts and a pot-of-gold back then.

There's nothing wrong with kids interfacing with technology. But there has to be balance, which can only come from parents.
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Old 10-13-2012, 04:45   #9
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OP, I agree with your sentiments, but I don't know any solutions. I assume you don't have any kids, yet. You may want to hold on to your post and read it periodically as you are raising a child. I'm sure you'll do a better job than your friend but it may give you insight to occasionally reflect on your earlier perceptions.

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Old 10-13-2012, 05:02   #10
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Oh.

I was going to suggest boiling in beer with onions and peppers for 20 minutes, and then tossing on the grill for a few minutes to crisp up the skins…..
I hear that's how they do it in New Guinea. Obviously, you have to field dress them first and you need a really big pot for the boiling.
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Old 10-13-2012, 05:17   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jame View Post
Oh.

I was going to suggest boiling in beer with onions and peppers for 20 minutes, and then tossing on the grill for a few minutes to crisp up the skins…..


sorry. wrong thread.

don't do that to the brats you've referred to.
No, that's actually a good solution for them
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Old 10-13-2012, 06:23   #12
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The next generation should be better, hunger and cold are great motivators. What is that line, "Survival cancels out programming"?
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Old 10-13-2012, 07:02   #13
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Raising my little 10 month old girl correctly has become the most important thing in my life. Unfortunately it it not the most important thing in most parents life. If you are going to raise strong, smart, independent kids you have to start young and be strong. It is hard. Saying no, setting boundaries and disciplining your children is easy and hard all at the same time.

For example, we have two cats. Food and water bowls on the floor near the kitchen counter for the last 5 years. Along comes our new bundle of joy. As she starts to crawl what does our little angel want to do? Well of course she wants to eat the cat food and play in the water. Who could blame her. It would've been easy to move the food and water to the back porch where she couldn't get to it. Not an option for me. Too many parents take the easy way out. After a few smacks to the hand, some strong no's and moving her away from the food she figured it out. She now crawls by the food and water without touching, sometimes she stops and looks at it but know better than to touch. She also has been taught not to stand up in her high chair or crawl on the end tables. After I taught her not to play in the cat food, how many times did it take me to teach her the other things were off limits? Not very many.
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Old 10-13-2012, 07:37   #14
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I've found that of my friends who are single parents, a lot of them tend to take the "easy" way out. They take the kid through the drive thru at mc d's instead of cooking a decent meal. They plant the kid in front of the TV while they try to get "work" done around the house. If the kid starts whining and fussing about nothing, they give the kid what he wants to shut him up.

Raising a child is not easy. It's even tougher when you're doing it by yourself. I've seen it firsthand.
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Old 10-13-2012, 07:56   #15
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To long, didn't read. Can you give me the shortened version? Preferably with illustrations to make it easier to understand.
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Old 10-13-2012, 08:00   #16
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To long, didn't read. Can you give me the shortened version? Preferably with illustrations to make it easier to understand.
Here you go, grill them, toss them in some beer, peppers and onions.

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Old 10-13-2012, 08:08   #17
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Here you go, grill them, toss them in some beer, peppers and onions.
Thanks man! I knew someone would help me out.
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Old 10-13-2012, 09:29   #18
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Here you go, grill them, toss them in some beer, peppers and onions.

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Old 10-13-2012, 09:44   #19
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were i to guess, the cliff note version is that it's too much work to be a parent. having them is ewasy. raising them is a lifelong commitment that people don't seem to understand. that child (or children) had damn well better be the basis for everything that you do. you better pay attention to what they are doingg, and when they are doing it.

single mom? i pity her...and the child. finding a guy who isn't freaked by a ready made family, or a drooling crying poopmachine is a tough sell.

the child will feel in the way. and, if the parent (regardles of sex) wants to live out some mindless jersey shore fantasy life, that child is pretty well screwed from the get go.

i know a single mom of 3. i keep hearing what a wonderful job she is doing. i call bravo sierra on that one, her younger brother pretty much raised them...until he finally had to go out on his own. being in an online relationship over x-box is not helping her, or the children.

if you aren't going to raise them, please don't have them. it's not fair to anyone. if you have them, you have a choice. suck it uop, and raise them, or start saving for court ordered therapy sessions and bail money here and now.

ymmv, rant over.
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Old 10-13-2012, 10:42   #20
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Oh.

I was going to suggest boiling in beer with onions and peppers for 20 minutes, and then tossing on the grill for a few minutes to crisp up the skins…..


sorry. wrong thread.

don't do that to the brats you've referred to.

Especially it being the Oktoberfest season and all, I am somewhat relieved that I was not the only one pulled into the thread with a completely different thought.
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Old 10-13-2012, 13:47   #21
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Men need to raise kids with their Wife.
It's a simple as that.
If it doesn't work I suggest the Men raise the boys and the Wife raises the girls. Boys are not programmed to be raised by weak Mothers. Some sort of good Male influence is required.
I raised a great Son on my own, it takes a lot of work, extra work to do it; but its an obligation you have and it has to be done right.
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Old 10-13-2012, 14:08   #22
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So are we blaming the bad parent or the two year old?
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Old 10-13-2012, 19:14   #23
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I always thought it was "BRAUTS" that got the boiled in beer recipe, with "BRATS" drowning the parents in beer was the recipe.
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Old 10-13-2012, 19:19   #24
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I seem to remember a whole generation, a few years ago, based upon the phrase "If It Feels Good Do It".

How's it feel now?
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Old 10-13-2012, 20:03   #25
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Oh.

I was going to suggest boiling in beer with onions and peppers for 20 minutes, and then tossing on the grill for a few minutes to crisp up the skins…..


sorry. wrong thread.

don't do that to the brats you've referred to.
I like them boiled in beer then grilled, with fried onions and brown mustard.
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