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Old 11-13-2012, 06:44   #1
airmotive
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Witnessing a life unravel on facebook

Not big into facebook, but use it to keep in touch with people whom I ordinarily wouldn't, but would be curious about. Highschool classmates, navy buddies, mother in law...

Anyhow...somehow I ended up as "friends" with a woman my wife worked with about a year ago. I don't recall how she ended up on my friends list, but I don't spend enough time on the site to worry about housekeeping my list, so she just kinda lingered there. I've met her exactly twice. Seemed normal enough. Divorced mother of two tweener girls. I'm not even sure where she lives now.

Shortly after she ended up on my friends list, her life started going downhill, and she put it ALL on facebook for the world to watch in excrutiatingly slow motion.

She was a middle school teacher....until she got a DUI last year. Not allowed to teach any more. Unemployed for a while, then part time at a doctor's office. This is when the religious posts began. Lots of "save me Jesus", and "These trials can only be overcome by my faith in the Lord." These would come in fits and spurts. Nothing for days, then a flurry of "I've given up and trust the Lord" posts.

One time she grounded one of her daughters, but the daughter gained access to mom's facebook account and posted some pretty hateful things....including "I'm a drunk ***** who beats my kids." Clearly, this was not a Brady Bunch household, but it was all being played out for the public to watch, just like the Brady Bunch.

Then this morning I check my account and there's another flurry of posts. They began late last night with "I need a miracle tonight Lord."
{an hour later}
Then, "If not tonight, Lord, all is lost and will be gone forever."
{1am}
"Sometimes we must lose everything to gain Him!"
{2am}
"I am ready to go Home" (The capitalization of "Home")
{2:10}
"I love you girls. I love you [several names]"
{2:15}
"This life is such a struggle. Won't it be good to go Home."
"My life is over. There is no need to try."

...then nothing....

Until about 30 minutes ago.
"Please pray for me."

Then just now...
"Alcoholism can be beaten."

She lived through the night.

She seems to have lots of friends who offer support...at least on facebook.

It's like watching a deer wander across an 8-lane highway. The outcome isn't certain, but it is predictable. Every day, lots of deer make it across that highway...but when one doesn't, it's horrible to watch.
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Last edited by airmotive; 11-13-2012 at 06:45..
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Old 11-13-2012, 06:51   #2
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It is sad to watch.

However, the things people post on Facebook. I guess they need an outlet; I hope she finds real help, not the folks on FB who say.."I'm there for ya". Sounds like she needs help! However, she may have gotten help and ignored it.




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Old 11-13-2012, 06:57   #3
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She's had at least a dozen each of "I'm here for ya", "hugs and prayers" and a few biblical quotes.

Not sure why so many people "liked" the "my life is over..." post. I think they meant well.
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Last edited by airmotive; 11-13-2012 at 06:58..
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Old 11-13-2012, 07:00   #4
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That's right up there with watching ex-spouses fight on facebook with "coded" messages without mentioning each others names.
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Old 11-13-2012, 07:01   #5
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Time to 'unfriend' her.
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Old 11-13-2012, 07:12   #6
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Time to 'unfriend' her.
Why now?



red
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Old 11-13-2012, 07:13   #7
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Sounds like she hit rock bottom and bounced back up a bit. Her new faith may have just saved her. My wife's sister committed suicide by OD and refused medical help....died hours later. She trashed her life by divorcing a good man and then shacked up with a bum. I guess the grass looks pretty brown from 6 feet under. She was a nice person and hard worker but just lost it at 45 years old. Could not help much 2000 miles away and she cut off all communication with us.....it is what it is.
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Old 11-13-2012, 07:15   #8
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If you don't know her, don't know where she lives, don't intend on helping...just unfriend her. There are a ton of folks that have problems, why have this one inject herself into your life. She made her choices, make yours.

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Old 11-13-2012, 07:17   #9
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I had two acquaintance level friends who had their divorce play out on Facebook. Wife raided their accounts, took all the money, sold all his posessions and locked him out of the house while he was away for work. He was left with the car he had with him and the clothes on his back. Nothing more. He made some pretty desperate posts for awhile but seemed to pull through it. There is always more to the sotry, of course, but looking at the wife's page she had some pretty worthless kids so it seemed fairly obvious to me what was going on. Overall, just sad, very sad that people are so ugly to each other.
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Old 11-13-2012, 07:18   #10
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Originally Posted by airmotive View Post
She's had at least a dozen each of "I'm here for ya", "hugs and prayers" and a few biblical quotes.

Not sure why so many people "liked" the "my life is over..." post. I think they meant well.
I figured so. I just watched a friend of mine and his wife get a divorce. I was friends with both on FB. She liked to report how miserable she was and how it was 'it wasn't her' fault. She hit bottom about two months ago and seems to be improving. There were so many 'likes', 'I'm there for ya', etc that it was an emotional cryfest on FB. The things people put on FB.



red
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Old 11-13-2012, 07:23   #11
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Originally Posted by airmotive View Post
Not sure why so many people "liked" the "my life is over..." post. I think they meant well.
I don't do FB but was reading Mom's one day and someone posted that so and so was in the hospital with a heart attack, then all these people "liked" that so and so was in bad shape.
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Old 11-13-2012, 07:31   #12
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Sounds like she is a drama queen with real problems to go with it.

Even in your position I would have probably been compelled to respond with "That sort of talk is unacceptable from anyone least of all a single mother. Regardless of your problems your children need you."
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Old 11-13-2012, 07:37   #13
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Hawt?
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Old 11-13-2012, 07:45   #14
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Hawt?
if he wanted to smash now would be pretty easy

jus sayin
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Old 11-13-2012, 07:48   #15
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There's a pic that says:

"I used to think that reading people's minds would be a cool superpower until I got Facebook"
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Old 11-13-2012, 07:59   #16
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God is not going to save you from whatever life choices you've made. God is not going to take special notice of you and make you his sole personal pet project. we are an ant farm and God is a bored kid, he thought we were neat for a little bit but has since gotten bored with us and moved on. God is currently outside playing stickball and we are on our own.

if he comes back and we're all dead he'll toss the whole thing in the trash and turn on his xbox without a second thought.
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Old 11-13-2012, 09:23   #17
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Just post this on her wall:

The Okie Corral

She puts stuff up for one reason and one reason only. Feedback. Raw unadulterated feedback. It's crack for women. Everything a woman posts is for other women. It's one big circle jerk without the traditional thing to jerk. You give me a "You Go Grrllll!" here and I'll give you a "He's is an *******" there. Round and round it goes.

In the end it's not about what is posted online (put on your thinking caps) it's about who is reading it.
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Old 11-13-2012, 09:27   #18
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Eh... She sounds like an annoying drunk..

Last edited by Smokin45; 11-13-2012 at 10:37..
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Old 11-13-2012, 09:28   #19
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Oh and Facebook is ghey
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Old 11-13-2012, 09:32   #20
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Seems like drinking is the root of all her problems. When she stops being a drunk life will get easier. It took me a while to figure that out and now I rarely drink and its only moderately.

She'll figure it out eventually
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Old 11-13-2012, 09:38   #21
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It's just crazy watching a person go from married professional with two kids, two cars and a house in the suburbs, to an unemployed, nearly homeless, divorced suicidal drunk in the space of a baseball season.
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Old 11-13-2012, 09:43   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by airmotive View Post
Shortly after she ended up on my friends list, her life started going downhill, and she put it ALL on facebook for the world to watch in excrutiatingly slow motion.


It's like watching a deer wander across an 8-lane highway. The outcome isn't certain, but it is predictable. Every day, lots of deer make it across that highway...but when one doesn't, it's horrible to watch.
Hmm...you mean watching people type stuff they probably shouldn't? That's the only reason I even have Facebook...that's 98% of the fun.

Last edited by tantrix; 11-13-2012 at 09:45..
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Old 11-13-2012, 09:48   #23
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Originally Posted by Smokin45 View Post
Oh and Facebook is ghey
It's cool to be ghey. Get with the times.
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Old 11-13-2012, 10:08   #24
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I hate it when i see peoples post like that, i feel bad for them. But iv just never really understood people posting everything about their life on there. Especially the ones who get angry and put comments soon after about how people should stay out of their business. Also never understood when people vent about their SO on facebook, as if they wont see it, lol.
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Old 11-13-2012, 10:25   #25
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Well , ...............? I'm 60 years young and life has never been better ! I do have one question though?Bad things happen to good people all the time , life ! I would love to tell my story but
ain't gonna !..................Any forum can be FACE-BOOK......! I just choose not to show you how beautiful I am !
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