When the husband finally died his wife put the usual death notice in the paper, but added that he died of gonorrhea. No sooner were the papers delivered when a good friend of the family phoned and complained bitterly, "You know very well that he died of diarrhea, not gonorrhea. Replied the widow, "I nursed him night and day so of course I know he died of diarrhea, but I thought it would be better for posterity to remember him as a great lover rather than the big turd he always was."
Don't dial 911, dial 1911
If you don't stand behind our troops, PLEASE feel free to stand in front of them!
Schiit audio, everything else ain't.