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Old 12-04-2005, 05:22   #1
nrmcolt
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Pop quiz!

(Not trying to tick anyone off, just some light humor)
The following quiz consists of four questions that tell you whether or not you are qualified to be a professional.

Scroll down for the answers. The questions are not that difficult. You just need to think like a professional.
If you are already familiar with the test you are hereby disqualified

1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?

2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?

3. A meeting was called for all the animal.All the animals attend except one. Which animal does not attend?

4. There is a river filled with crocodiles. How do you cross it?

I'll give the answers after ten posters who care to reply.;f

;c
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Last edited by nrmcolt; 12-04-2005 at 06:29..
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Old 12-04-2005, 07:21   #2
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Hehe... heard this one in highschool. But since we are in a firearm oriented forum, I guess the modified answer should start with: "First, shoot the giraffe...";f A heated discussion will then ensue about what caliber would have enough stopping power to bring down a giraffe. Someone will then argue the legalities of shooting an unarmed giraffe and the politically correct rules of engagement when confronted witha long-necked mammal refusing to step inside a refrigerator. The thread will then be derailed by someone offering his/her favorite recipe for kalderetang giraffe since no one wants the giraffe in the ref to go to waste!;Q Then we gotta deal with the elephant...

But seriously, nrmcolt, astig yung answer dito sa quiz mo! I still laughed when I saw it.;f
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Old 12-04-2005, 07:48   #3
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Re: Pop quiz!

deleted.
sorry kill joy ako e.;e;g

Last edited by mikol; 12-04-2005 at 08:23..
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Old 12-04-2005, 08:05   #4
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1. i'll chop up the giraffe and stuff it inside the ref.
2. i'll do the same to the elephant.
3. the elephant and the giraffe.
4. i'll skip, hop and jump in their backs
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Old 12-04-2005, 09:45   #5
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Re: Pop quiz!

Quote:
Originally posted by nrmcolt


1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?

you open the ref's door and stuff the giraffe inside.

2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?

you take out the giraffe first then stuff the elephant inside.

3. A meeting was called for all the animal.All the animals attend except one. Which animal does not attend?

the elephant, of course. its inside the ref.

4. There is a river filled with crocodiles. How do you cross it?

you take out the frozen elephant out the ref and float it in the river. jump on the elephant and cross the river.
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Old 12-04-2005, 09:47   #6
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Re: Pop quiz!

Quote:
Originally posted by nrmcolt
(Not trying to tick anyone off, just some light humor)
The following quiz consists of four questions that tell you whether or not you are qualified to be a professional.

Scroll down for the answers. The questions are not that difficult. You just need to think like a professional.
If you are already familiar with the test you are hereby disqualified

1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? with great difficulty

2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?Take the giraffe out, then stuff the elephant in with great difficulty

3. A meeting was called for all the animal.All the animals attend except one. Which animal does not attend? the elephant, of course

4. There is a river filled with crocodiles. How do you cross it? with a boat

I'll give the answers after ten posters who care to reply.;f

;c
;f
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Old 12-04-2005, 09:49   #7
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Re: Re: Pop quiz!

Quote:
Originally posted by Eye Cutter
4. just swim accross using back stroke since there's no more crocodile in the river kasi nadoon sa meeting kasama ng iba pang hayop! ;f ;e
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Old 12-04-2005, 09:56   #8
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;z ;z ;z

Ok. Next questions.

1. Why can't 4 elephants play basketball?

2. How do you fit 5 elephants in a volkwagen?

3. Where are the elephants going in a volkwagen? And why?
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Old 12-04-2005, 10:08   #9
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Quote:
Originally posted by casmot
;z ;z ;z

Ok. Next questions.

1. Why can't 4 elephants play basketball?
'coz there's no jersy for elepant size?

2. How do you fit 5 elephants in a volkwagen?
just delete the ele and put the 5 phants inside the volkswagen?

3. Where are the elephants going in a volkwagen? And why?
try to hitch a ride? 'coz they want to go to madagascar and spent their vacation along with a lion, zebra, giraffe, hipo & pengoins?
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Old 12-04-2005, 10:26   #10
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Teka muna, tama ba yung sagot sa unang tanong?

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Old 12-04-2005, 15:39   #11
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Quote:
Originally posted by casmot


1. Why can't 4 elephants play basketball?

kulang pa ng isang elephant!

2. How do you fit 5 elephants in a volkwagen?

2 in front, 3 at the back!

3. Where are the elephants going in a volkwagen? And why?

to the gym. to play basketball, of course!
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Old 12-04-2005, 17:42   #12
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Re: Pop quiz!

[QUOTE]

4. There is a river filled with crocodiles. How do you cross it?

it would be smarter to cross the river if you use the bridge!!;a
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Old 12-04-2005, 19:51   #13
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Answers...

Yup DocEC nailed the 1st 3 correct answers but not question no.4

New_comer almost got it

Gundog got no.4

;f ;a ;c
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Old 12-04-2005, 22:33   #14
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hahaha... anymore elephant jokes?
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Old 12-05-2005, 01:57   #15
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Re: Answers...

Quote:
Originally posted by nrmcolt
Yup DocEC nailed the 1st 3 correct answers but not question no.4

New_comer almost got it

Gundog got no.4

4. There is a river filled with crocodiles. How do you cross it?

it would be smarter to cross the river if you use the bridge!!

;f ;a ;c
If that's the case, I'd rather be in an airplane. Baka me mag-abang din sa bridge na mga buwaya, tulad dun sa may Nagtahan...
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Old 12-05-2005, 02:19   #16
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I don't know about the elephant or the giraffe but I think a browning .50 cal machine gun will do the trick with the crocidiles.


Just kidding I have seen this one before and didn't want to spoil it have fun.;a
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Old 12-06-2005, 15:40   #17
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answer me this batman!
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Old 12-06-2005, 15:41   #18
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1. Pulchritude possesses solely cutaneous profundity.


2. Scintillate, scintillate, dimunutive asteroid.


3. Members of an avian species of identical plumage congregate.


4. Surveillance should precede saltation.


5. It is fruitless to become lachrymose over precipitately departed lacteal fluid.


6. Freedom from incrustations of grimes is contiguous to divinity


7. The stylus is more potent than the claymore.


8. It is fruitless to attempt to indoctrinate a superannuated canine with innovative maneuvers.


9. Eschew the implement of corrections and vitiate the scion.


10. The temperature of the aqueous content of an unremittingly ogled cooking container does not reach 212 degrees Fahrenheit.


11. Neophyte's serendipity.


12. Male cadavers are incapable of yielding any testimony.


13. Individuals who make their abode in vitreous edifices would be advised to refrain from catapulting petrous projections.


14. All articles that coruscate with resplendence are not truly auriferous.


15. Where there are visible vapors having their province in ignited carbonaceous material, there is conflagration.


16. Sorting on the parts of mendicants must be interdicted.


17. A plethora of individuals with expertise in culinary technique vitiates the potable concoction produced by steeping comestibles.


18. Exclusive dedication to necessary chores without interludes of hedonistic diversion renders John an addlepated fellow.


19. A revolving lithic conglomerate accumulates no diminutive glaucous bryophytic plants.


20. The person presenting the ultimate cachinnation possesses, thereby, the optimal cachinnation.


21. Missiles of ligneous or porous consistency have the potential of fracturing my osseous structure but appellations will eternally be benign.


22. Propinquity avails itself only in the coverlets of equine quadra-bases.


23. On no occasion deposit aggregate products of domesticated fowls in a single receptacle.


24. Allow me to caution you against enumerating your fowl prior to their delivery into the environment.


25. When visiting an unfamiliar terrain, perform in accordance with the customs of the local inhabitants.


26. Do not imitate my personal behavior, but endeavor to comport yourself with reference to my instructions.


27. A feathered avian species held in an extremity, has the significance of a duo in shrubbery.


28. Diminutive vessels are equipped with immense auricles.


29. When precipitation descends vertically, it issues forth copiously and continuously.


30. No individual specimen in the species Homo Sapiens exists in a condition of isolation.


31. If an enclosure for a pedal extremity adapts itself suitably to said appendage, it would be advisable to employ it accordingly.


32. If a large solid-footed mammal becomes available to you without compensation, refrain from casting your faculty for seeing into the oral cavity of such a creature.


33. A canine which gives vent to his sentiments by a series of vocal efforts, rarely finds use of his bicuspids. (This is one of the most-missed questions so far.)


34. An individual who vacillates when there is need of action will find himself beyond the hope of future success.


35. In the solar system, the possibility of a novel discovery is predominantly non-existent.


36. Superfluous chronological dispatch institutes riddance of valued effects.


37. Each vaporous mass suspended in the firmament has an interior decoration of metallic hue.


38. Lack of what is required is the matriarch of inspiration.


39. A single unit of a seam properly distributed at the correct measure of duration will maintain a square root of 81.


40. The placement of the termination as prescedent of the commencement should never be assessed.


41. He who locks himself into the arms of Morpheus promptly at eventide, and starts the day before it is officially announced by the rising sun, excels in physical fitness, increases his economic assets and celebrates with remarkable efficiency.


42. Deliberate squandering of one's assets culminates in lamentable destitution. (This one is rather obscure, or obsolete.)


43. Clocks and calendars will not delay their schedules for the convenience of any entity.


44. There is a multitude of methods that one can resort to if one elects to fleece a feline.


45. One percent of a medium of exchange conserved is that quantity deserved.


46. Visualizing is the equivalent to having faith.


47. That which is acquired without difficulty is dispersed with equal facility.


48. A chronic disposition to inquiry deprived the domestic feline carnivorous quadruped of its vital quality.


49. Immature homo sapiens should be endowed with visibility but not oral facilities.


50. Taciturnity is aurous.


51. The herbage is customarily more verduous on the diametrical selvage of the property barrier.


52. Everything is legitimate in matters pertaining to ardent affection and armed conflict between nations.


53. Exercise your visual facilities prior to executing a jump.


54. A comrade who comes to your assistance during periods of dire desperation is to be valued above all other allies.


55. If one cannot endure excessive temperatures, it is preferable that he avoid that section of the domicile where the cuisine is concocted.


56. Gormandize comestibles, imbibe libations, and indulge in diversions because on the morrow, all such activities will be curtailed.


57. Eleemosynary deeds have their incipience intramurally.


58. Persons of imbellic mentality divagate inparameter which cherubic entities approach with trepidation.


59. Elementary sartorial techniques intitially appplied preclude repetitious actions to the squares of three.


60. Abstention from any aleatory undertaking precludes a potential escalation of a lucrative nature.


61. Allow somnolent quadrapeds to remain reclining.


62. That which ascends to the stratosphere inevitably descends to terra firma.


63. The individual of the class Aves arriving prior to the appointed time seizes the invertebrate animals of the phylum Vermes.


64. Cleave gamineous matter for fodder during the period in which the orb of the day is refulgent.


65. A person of moronic proclivities and his pecuniary resources are separated with celerity.


66. It is practicable to entice an equus caballus to a reservoir of liquid hydrogen oxide but coercing him to imbibe is insuperable.


67. Similar sire, similar scion.


68. Deviation from the ordinary or common routine of existence is that which gives zest to man's cycle of existence.
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Last edited by Eye Cutter; 12-06-2005 at 15:45..
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Old 12-06-2005, 15:47   #19
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to see the answers, highlight the text in the following post. this was sent to me by Saruman
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Last edited by Eye Cutter; 12-06-2005 at 15:50..
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Old 12-06-2005, 15:49   #20
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wow, what a way with words.
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Old 12-06-2005, 15:51   #21
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yup! so baka meron pa magreklamo ng use of a foreign language dito! hahaha


to see the answers, highlight the text in the following post. this was sent to me by Saruman
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Old 12-06-2005, 15:51   #22
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1. Pulchritude possesses solely cutaneous profundity.
Beauty is only skin-deep.

2. Scintillate, scintillate, dimunutive asteroid.

Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star.

3. Members of an avian species of identical plumage congregate.
Birds of a feather flock together.

4. Surveillance should precede saltation.
Look before you leap.

5. It is fruitless to become lachrymose over precipitately departed lacteal fluid.
No use crying over spilt milk.

6. Freedom from incrustations of grimes is contiguous to divinity
Cleanliness is next to Godliness.

7. The stylus is more potent than the claymore.
The pen is more powerful than the sword.

8. It is fruitless to attempt to indoctrinate a superannuated canine with innovative maneuvers.
You can't teach an old dog new tricks.

9. Eschew the implement of corrections and vitiate the scion.
Spare the rod, and spoil the child.

10. The temperature of the aqueous content of an unremittingly ogled cooking container does not reach 212 degrees Fahrenheit.
A watched pot never boils.

11. Neophyte's serendipity.
Beginner's luck.

12. Male cadavers are incapable of yielding any testimony.
Dead men tell no tales.

13. Individuals who make their abode in vitreous edifices would be advised to refrain from catapulting petrous projections.
People who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones.

14. All articles that coruscate with resplendence are not truly auriferous.
All that glitters is not gold.

15. Where there are visible vapors having their province in ignited carbonaceous material, there is conflagration.
Where there's smoke, there's fire.

16. Sorting on the parts of mendicants must be interdicted.
Beggars can't be choosers.

17. A plethora of individuals with expertise in culinary technique vitiates the potable concoction produced by steeping comestibles.
Too many cooks spoil the broth.

18. Exclusive dedication to necessary chores without interludes of hedonistic diversion renders John an addlepated fellow.
All work and no play makes John a dull boy.

19. A revolving lithic conglomerate accumulates no diminutive glaucous bryophytic plants.
A rolling stone gathers no moss.

20. The person presenting the ultimate cachinnation possesses, thereby, the optimal cachinnation.
Whoever laughs last, laughs best.

21. Missiles of ligneous or porous consistency have the potential of fracturing my osseous structure but appellations will eternally be benign.
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me.

22. Propinquity avails itself only in the coverlets of equine quadra-bases.
Close only counts in horse-shoes.

23. On no occasion deposit aggregate products of domesticated fowls in a single receptacle.
Don't put all your eggs in one basket.

24. Allow me to caution you against enumerating your fowl prior to their delivery into the environment.
Don't count your chickens before they're hatched.

25. When visiting an unfamiliar terrain, perform in accordance with the customs of the local inhabitants.
When in Rome do as the Romans do.

26. Do not imitate my personal behavior, but endeavor to comport yourself with reference to my instructions.
Do as I say, not as I do.

27. A feathered avian species held in an extremity, has the significance of a duo in shrubbery.
A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.

28. Diminutive vessels are equipped with immense auricles.
Little pitchers have big ears.

29. When precipitation descends vertically, it issues forth copiously and continuously.
If it rains, it pours.

30. No individual specimen in the species Homo Sapiens exists in a condition of isolation.
No man is an island.

31. If an enclosure for a pedal extremity adapts itself suitably to said appendage, it would be advisable to employ it accordingly.
If the shoe fits, wear it.

32. If a large solid-footed mammal becomes available to you without compensation, refrain from casting your faculty for seeing into the oral cavity of such a creature.
Don't look a gift horse in the mouth.

33. A canine which gives vent to his sentiments by a series of vocal efforts, rarely finds use of his bicuspids. (This is one of the most-missed questions so far.)
A barking dog seldom bites. (NOT "bark is worse than his bite.")

34. An individual who vacillates when there is need of action will find himself beyond the hope of future success.
He who hesitates is lost.

35. In the solar system, the possibility of a novel discovery is predominantly non-existent.
There's nothing new under the sun.

36. Superfluous chronological dispatch institutes riddance of valued effects.
Haste makes waste.

37. Each vaporous mass suspended in the firmament has an interior decoration of metallic hue.
Every cloud has a silver lining.

38. Lack of what is required is the matriarch of inspiration.
Necessity is the mother of invention.

39. A single unit of a seam properly distributed at the correct measure of duration will maintain a square root of 81.
A stitch in time saves nine.

40. The placement of the termination as prescedent of the commencement should never be assessed.
The ends do not justify the means.

41. He who locks himself into the arms of Morpheus promptly at eventide, and starts the day before it is officially announced by the rising sun, excels in physical fitness, increases his economic assets and celebrates with remarkable efficiency.
Early to bed and early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise.

42. Deliberate squandering of one's assets culminates in lamentable destitution. (This one is rather obscure, or obsolete.)
Wilful waste makes woeful want. (NOT "Waste not, want not")

43. Clocks and calendars will not delay their schedules for the convenience of any entity.
Time waits for no man.

44. There is a multitude of methods that one can resort to if one elects to fleece a feline.
More than one way to skin a cat.

45. One percent of a medium of exchange conserved is that quantity deserved.
A penny saved is a penny earned.

46. Visualizing is the equivalent to having faith.
Seeing is believing.

47. That which is acquired without difficulty is dispersed with equal facility.
Easy come, easy go.

48. A chronic disposition to inquiry deprived the domestic feline carnivorous quadruped of its vital quality.
Curiosity killed the cat.

49. Immature homo sapiens should be endowed with visibility but not oral facilities.
Children should be seen, not heard.

50. Taciturnity is aurous.
Silence is golden.

51. The herbage is customarily more verduous on the diametrical selvage of the property barrier.
The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.

52. Everything is legitimate in matters pertaining to ardent affection and armed conflict between nations.
All's fair in love and war.

53. Exercise your visual facilities prior to executing a jump.
Look before you leap.

54. A comrade who comes to your assistance during periods of dire desperation is to be valued above all other allies.
A friend in need is a friend indeed.

55. If one cannot endure excessive temperatures, it is preferable that he avoid that section of the domicile where the cuisine is concocted.
If you can't stand the heat, keep out of the kitchen.

56. Gormandize comestibles, imbibe libations, and indulge in diversions because on the morrow, all such activities will be curtailed.
Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we die.

57. Eleemosynary deeds have their incipience intramurally.
Charity begins at home

58. Persons of imbellic mentality divagate inparameter which cherubic entities approach with trepidation.
Fools rush in where angels fear to tread.

59. Elementary sartorial techniques intitially appplied preclude repetitious actions to the squares of three.
Stitch in time saves nine.

60. Abstention from any aleatory undertaking precludes a potential escalation of a lucrative nature.
Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

61. Allow somnolent quadrapeds to remain reclining.
Let sleeping dogs lie.

62. That which ascends to the stratosphere inevitably descends to terra firma.
What goes up, must come down.

63. The individual of the class Aves arriving prior to the appointed time seizes the invertebrate animals of the phylum Vermes.
The early bird gets the worm.

64. Cleave gamineous matter for fodder during the period in which the orb of the day is refulgent.
Make hay while the sun shines.

65. A person of moronic proclivities and his pecuniary resources are separated with celerity.
A fool and his money are soon parted.

66. It is practicable to entice an equus caballus to a reservoir of liquid hydrogen oxide but coercing him to imbibe is insuperable.
You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink.

67. Similar sire, similar scion.
Like father, like son.

68. Deviation from the ordinary or common routine of existence is that which gives zest to man's cycle of existence.
Variety is the spice of life.
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Old 12-07-2005, 01:28   #23
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err ah eh.. pwede po ba paki Tagalog/ Pilipino mga katanungan ;z ;z ;z ;z ;z
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Old 12-07-2005, 04:49   #24
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Quote:
Originally posted by Eye Cutter
1. Pulchritude possesses solely cutaneous profundity. Beauty is skin deep
2. Scintillate, scintillate, dimunutive asteroid.
Twinkle, twinkle litle star.
3. Members of an avian species of identical plumage congregate.
Birds of a feather flock together.
4. Surveillance should precede saltation.
Look before you leap.
5. It is fruitless to become lachrymose over precipitately departed lacteal fluid. Do not cry over spilt milk.
6. Freedom from incrustations of grimes is contiguous to divinity
Cleanliness is next to godliness.
7. The stylus is more potent than the claymore. The pen is mightier than the sword.
8. It is fruitless to attempt to indoctrinate a superannuated canine with innovative maneuvers. You can't teach gundog new tricks.
9. Eschew the implement of corrections and vitiate the scion.
Spoil the rod and spoil the child.
10. The temperature of the aqueous content of an unremittingly ogled cooking container does not reach 212 degrees Fahrenheit. A watched pot never boils.
11. Neophyte's serendipity. Beginner's luck; or more relevantly, Mannix's tyro medal.
12. Male cadavers are incapable of yielding any testimony. Dead ten tell no tales. Garci tells strange ones.
13. Individuals who make their abode in vitreous edifices would be advised to refrain from catapulting petrous projections. People who live in glass houses should not throw stones.
14. All articles that coruscate with resplendence are not truly auriferous. All that glitters is not gold.
15. Where there are visible vapors having their province in ignited carbonaceous material, there is conflagration. Where there's smoke, there's fire.
16. Sorting on the parts of mendicants must be interdicted.
Beggars cannot be choosers
17. A plethora of individuals with expertise in culinary technique vitiates the potable concoction produced by steeping comestibles.
Too many cooks spoil the broth.
18. Exclusive dedication to necessary chores without interludes of hedonistic diversion renders John an addlepated fellow. All work and no play makes John a dull boy.
19. A revolving lithic conglomerate accumulates no diminutive glaucous bryophytic plants. A rolling stone gathers no moss.
20. The person presenting the ultimate cachinnation possesses, thereby, the optimal cachinnation. He who laughs last, laughs best.
21. Missiles of ligneous or porous consistency have the potential of fracturing my osseous structure but appellations will eternally be benign. Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never harm me.
22. Propinquity avails itself only in the coverlets of equine quadra-bases.


23. On no occasion deposit aggregate products of domesticated fowls in a single receptacle.
Do no tput all your eggs in one basket.

24. Allow me to caution you against enumerating your fowl prior to their delivery into the environment. Do not count chickens before they are hatched


25. When visiting an unfamiliar terrain, perform in accordance with the customs of the local inhabitants. When in Rome, do as the Romans do.


26. Do not imitate my personal behavior, but endeavor to comport yourself with reference to my instructions.


27. A feathered avian species held in an extremity, has the significance of a duo in shrubbery. A bird in hand is worth two in the bush


28. Diminutive vessels are equipped with immense auricles.


29. When precipitation descends vertically, it issues forth copiously and continuously. When it rains it pours


30. No individual specimen in the species Homo Sapiens exists in a condition of isolation. No man is an island


31. If an enclosure for a pedal extremity adapts itself suitably to said appendage, it would be advisable to employ it accordingly.
If the shoe fits, wear it
32. If a large solid-footed mammal becomes available to you without compensation, refrain from casting your faculty for seeing into the oral cavity of such a creature. Do not look at a gift horse in the mouth


33. A canine which gives vent to his sentiments by a series of vocal efforts, rarely finds use of his bicuspids. (This is one of the most-missed questions so far.) A dog's bark is worse than his bite


34. An individual who vacillates when there is need of action will find himself beyond the hope of future success. He who hesitates is lost


35. In the solar system, the possibility of a novel discovery is predominantly non-existent. Once in a blue moon?


36. Superfluous chronological dispatch institutes riddance of valued effects. Haste makes waste


37. Each vaporous mass suspended in the firmament has an interior decoration of metallic hue. Every cloud has a silver lining.


38. Lack of what is required is the matriarch of inspiration. Necessity is the mother of invention.


39. A single unit of a seam properly distributed at the correct measure of duration will maintain a square root of 81. A stitch in time saves nine.


40. The placement of the termination as prescedent of the commencement should never be assessed. Do not put the cart before the horse?


41. He who locks himself into the arms of Morpheus promptly at eventide, and starts the day before it is officially announced by the rising sun, excels in physical fitness, increases his economic assets and celebrates with remarkable efficiency. Early to bed, early to rise,makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.


42. Deliberate squandering of one's assets culminates in lamentable destitution. (This one is rather obscure, or obsolete.)


43. Clocks and calendars will not delay their schedules for the convenience of any entity. Time and tide wait for no one


44. There is a multitude of methods that one can resort to if one elects to fleece a feline. There is more than one way to skin a cat


45. One percent of a medium of exchange conserved is that quantity deserved. A penny saved, a penny earned.


46. Visualizing is the equivalent to having faith. To see is to believe


47. That which is acquired without difficulty is dispersed with equal facility. What is easily gained is easily lost?


48. A chronic disposition to inquiry deprived the domestic feline carnivorous quadruped of its vital quality. Curiosity killed the cat.


49. Immature homo sapiens should be endowed with visibility but not oral facilities. Children should be seen not heard?


50. Taciturnity is aurous.


51. The herbage is customarily more verduous on the diametrical selvage of the property barrier. The grass is greener on the other side.


52. Everything is legitimate in matters pertaining to ardent affection and armed conflict between nations. All is fair in love and war.


53. Exercise your visual facilities prior to executing a jump. Look before you leap.


54. A comrade who comes to your assistance during periods of dire desperation is to be valued above all other allies. A friend in need is a friend indeed.


55. If one cannot endure excessive temperatures, it is preferable that he avoid that section of the domicile where the cuisine is concocted. If you cannot stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.


56. Gormandize comestibles, imbibe libations, and indulge in diversions because on the morrow, all such activities will be curtailed. Eat, drink and be merry ...


57. Eleemosynary deeds have their incipience intramurally. Charity begins at home


58. Persons of imbellic mentality divagate inparameter which cherubic entities approach with trepidation. Fools go where angels fear to tread.


59. Elementary sartorial techniques intitially appplied preclude repetitious actions to the squares of three. A stitch in time saves nine?


60. Abstention from any aleatory undertaking precludes a potential escalation of a lucrative nature. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure?


61. Allow somnolent quadrapeds to remain reclining. Let sleeping gundogs lie


62. That which ascends to the stratosphere inevitably descends to terra firma. What goes up must come down


63. The individual of the class Aves arriving prior to the appointed time seizes the invertebrate animals of the phylum Vermes. The early bird gets the worm


64. Cleave gamineous matter for fodder during the period in which the orb of the day is refulgent. Make hay while the sun shines


65. A person of moronic proclivities and his pecuniary resources are separated with celerity. A fool and his money are soon parted


66. It is practicable to entice an equus caballus to a reservoir of liquid hydrogen oxide but coercing him to imbibe is insuperable. You can lead a horse to water, but you cannot make him drink


67. Similar sire, similar scion. Like father, like son


68. Deviation from the ordinary or common routine of existence is that which gives zest to man's cycle of existence.
Variety is the spice of life ;f

Last edited by Taurus; 12-07-2005 at 04:59..
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Old 12-07-2005, 04:59   #25
antediluvianist
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2003
Location: planet earth
Posts: 2,236
1. What's the difference between a snow man and a snow woman?





















snow balls.


2. How can you identify an Italian airplane?




















by the hair under the wings.
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