There were four country churches in a small Texas town:
The Presbyterian Church,
the Methodist Church,
the Baptist Church,
and the Catholic Church.
Each church was overrun with pesky squirrels.
One day, the Presbyterian Church called a meeting to decide what to do about the squirrels. After much prayer and consideration they determined that the squirrels were predestined to be there and they shouldn't interfere with God's divine will.
In the Methodist Church, the squirrels had taken up habitation in the baptistery bowl. The deacons met and decided to put a cover on the baptistery bowland drown the squirrels in it. The squirrels
escaped somehow and there were twice as many there the next week.
The Baptist Church got together and decided that they were not in a position to harm any of God's creation. So, they humanely trapped the squirrels and set them free a few miles outside of town.
Three days later, the squirrels were back.
But the Catholic Church came up with the best and most effective solution. They baptized the squirrels and registered them as members of the church. Now they only see them on Christmas and Easter...
"There's only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well please.
And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences."
-- P.J. O'Rourke