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Old 04-10-2007, 22:24   #1
Andrewsky
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I'm Upset Boys--Even a Touch Offended

So, I was sitting at the computer tonight, minding my own business, reading GT, as always. My mom sits down next to me and says that my neighbor told her that in Texas "if you're in traffic and someone looks at you the wrong way, you can shoot them." These are the exact words. Immediately, this grabbed my attention, and my mom said it's a new law.

I figured this must be the Castle Doctrine law and I made sure to set her straight about what it actually is. I also pointed out that Texas isn't an absolute gun paradise--open carry of pistols is prohibited.

Jeez, what the heck is wrong with people!
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Old 04-10-2007, 22:27   #2
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Old 04-10-2007, 22:33   #3
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Re: I'm Upset Boys--Even a Touch Offended

Quote:
Originally posted by Andrewsky
My mom sits down next to me and says that my neighbor told her that in Texas "if you're in traffic and someone looks at you the wrong way, you can shoot them." These are the exact words. Immediately, this grabbed my attention, and my mom said it's a new law.

Yes. It is also a requirement for citizenship here that you must own a 1976 Cadillac and know the difference between breeds of cattle on site. You are also allowed to sexually violate any woman that looks good and are not required, merely asked, to pay for expensive electronic equipment in stores...

WTF??? I would hope that common sense would prevent someone who has reproduced to believe that, Andrew! There is no city here called "Red Dawn,TX". (not that there shouldn't be, keep in mind)
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Old 04-10-2007, 22:42   #4
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Maybe when she said that she thought it was April 1st....
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Old 04-10-2007, 22:51   #5
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Re: Re: I'm Upset Boys--Even a Touch Offended

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Originally posted by Mac Truck
Yes. It is also a requirement for citizenship here that you must own a 1976 Cadillac and know the difference between breeds of cattle on site. You are also allowed to sexually violate any woman that looks good and are not required, merely asked, to pay for expensive electronic equipment in stores...

WTF??? I would hope that common sense would prevent someone who has reproduced to believe that, Andrew! There is no city here called "Red Dawn,TX". (not that there shouldn't be, keep in mind)
I've never really been to Texas. Crossed through the panhandle once and also flew into the Dallas airport.

But I do hear that everyone there has a 4x4 with a confederate flag on the backlight.

I also hear that instead of saying "Good Morning" people say "God defend the right," referring to the right to own slaves.

I'm not moving to Texas. I don't want to get shot!
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Old 04-10-2007, 22:51   #6
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Good, nobody would look at me in a wrong way then.

Imagaing, if that's true, how many bullet hole I would get for checking out girls drive besides me?
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Old 04-10-2007, 23:19   #7
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Re: Re: Re: I'm Upset Boys--Even a Touch Offended

Quote:
Originally posted by Andrewsky
I've never really been to Texas. Crossed through the panhandle once and also flew into the Dallas airport.

But I do hear that everyone there has a 4x4 with a confederate flag on the backlight.

I also hear that instead of saying "Good Morning" people say "God defend the right," referring to the right to own slaves.

I'm not moving to Texas. I don't want to get shot!
I am both 37% dumber, and about 100% GAYER (0% to begin with!) for having read this. You have to be pulling my leg. I REFUSE to believe that someone would be this moronic.
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Old 04-10-2007, 23:26   #8
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Why, I was just at the convenience store yesterday, purchasing a Lone Star beer and a box of .50's. I approached the door just as a cowboy hat weilding gentleman with cowboy boots and a confederate bandana was leaving. He held the door for me, and I tipped my own cowboy hat as a courtesy. We both greeted each other with "God Defend the right...", you know, because we both belong to the same Klan.

Andrew, for the sake of everything holy, read a damm book on Texas or google it or something. This is asinine.
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Old 04-10-2007, 23:38   #9
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So, how well do you personally know George W. Bush?

Hey, what does "God Defend the Right" actually mean?

Be sure to tell us how many border jumpers you get (dead or alive) when you go down to sit on the Rio Grande in a lawn chair with your rifle and horse this weekend.

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Old 04-11-2007, 00:22   #10
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Re: Re: Re: Re: I'm Upset Boys--Even a Touch Offended

Quote:
Originally posted by Mac Truck
I am both 37% dumber, and about 100% GAYER (0% to begin with!) for having read this. You have to be pulling my leg. I REFUSE to believe that someone would be this moronic.
Steers and queers, my friend. I guess Gunny was right.
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Old 04-11-2007, 00:24   #11
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Quote:
Originally posted by Andrewsky
So, how well do you personally know George W. Bush?

Hey, what does "God Defend the Right" actually mean?

Be sure to tell us how many border jumpers you get (dead or alive) when you go down to sit on the Rio Grande in a lawn chair with your rifle and horse this weekend.
This has gone way off topic and has gotten way too weird. I'm going to bed. Maybe things will have straightened themselves out by morning.

As for lack of education and downright stupidity, I've heard plenty of it: I used to work in the local utility company's call center.

Plenty of to go around.

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Old 04-11-2007, 00:30   #12
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Re: Re: I'm Upset Boys--Even a Touch Offended

Quote:
Originally posted by Mac Truck
Yes. It is also a requirement for citizenship here that you must own a 1976 Cadillac and know the difference between breeds of cattle on site.
The requirement is that you have to own a 76 Cadillac with bull horns mounted on the front of the hood. You don't know crap about Texas.
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Old 04-11-2007, 01:58   #13
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Re: I'm Upset Boys--Even a Touch Offended

Quote:
Originally posted by Andrewsky
So, I was sitting at the computer tonight, minding my own business, reading GT, as always. My mom sits down next to me and says that my neighbor told her that in Texas "if you're in traffic and someone looks at you the wrong way, you can shoot them." These are the exact words. Immediately, this grabbed my attention, and my mom said it's a new law.

I figured this must be the Castle Doctrine law and I made sure to set her straight about what it actually is. I also pointed out that Texas isn't an absolute gun paradise--open carry of pistols is prohibited.

Jeez, what the heck is wrong with people!
Well, she almost got it right. If you're in traffic and someone looks at you the wrong way, you can shoot them, but only if you're in your pickemup truck and going less than 85 mph, no earlier than 30 minutes after sunrise and 30 minutes before sunset. (Safety comes first, you know.) No good if you're in a Honda.
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Old 04-11-2007, 01:59   #14
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Re: Re: Re: I'm Upset Boys--Even a Touch Offended

Quote:
Originally posted by Cokeman
The requirement is that you have to own a 76 Cadillac with bull horns mounted on the front of the hood. You don't know crap about Texas.
Touche'. Verrrry funny... I just didn't want anyone to mistake us for claiming Boss Hogg. He's over in Georgia.
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Old 04-11-2007, 02:36   #15
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Oh yeah.
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Old 04-11-2007, 04:13   #16
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An aside: I once worked for a telemarketer who also contracted with the NRA. (I should have gone for that opening at first instead of non-profit organizations.) Anyway I told one of the other associates, a little sheep like woman, I wanted to transfer to the NRA branch. After that she told people I frightened her. After I was let go she told a friend of mine who was 16 year employee there that I said, "I should come in here one day with a gun and not leave until there was no one left standing!"

Freaking asshats.
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Old 04-11-2007, 04:50   #17
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What!!!???? You can't just shoot someone for looking at you funny????

That's the whole reason I applied for my CCW permit! Well, not going to need that anymore. Anyone want to buy a slightly used like new G19?

Uneducated public is scary sometimes...
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Old 04-11-2007, 05:52   #18
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to truly set the record straight... those cadillacs with bull horns are a bit appalchian in origin... some freaky deaky wanna be cow roper thought they looked cool and then somehow we get stuck with it...

what you are required to have is a tow rope, a cooler, and something on a truck frame... without which you are truly useless in my state.


You are also required to ignore LoneStar beer as a whole, and hereby redeemed by the greatness that is Shiner Boch. Russian beer, made by germans, in Texas... best combination EVER

you are also required to know how to drive said SUV/truck whilst shooting at cow theives, without damaging said vehicle.

You are required to say ya'll, and stop calling it soda and pop or any variations therof... it is simply a coke - (specify brand)


You are required to try ranch dressing on everything, even if you hate it the first time... you still have to try it.

You are required to go mudding and/or rut riding at least once... and must get stuck once
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Old 04-11-2007, 06:32   #19
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Re: Re: Re: I'm Upset Boys--Even a Touch Offended

Quote:
Originally posted by Andrewsky
I've never really been to Texas. Crossed through the panhandle once and also flew into the Dallas airport.

But I do hear that everyone there has a 4x4 with a confederate flag on the backlight.

I also hear that instead of saying "Good Morning" people say "God defend the right," referring to the right to own slaves.

I'm not moving to Texas. I don't want to get shot!

I really hope this kid is joking. If not, these statements make his mom's neighbor's statement look ingenious
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Old 04-11-2007, 10:26   #20
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Quote:
Originally posted by Lykoi



You are also required to ignore LoneStar beer as a whole, and hereby redeemed by the greatness that is Shiner Boch. Russian beer, made by germans, in Texas... best combination EVER

CAN I GET AN "AMEN"???!!!!!!


...Lone Star Beer was never the same after the big brewerey bought it out. The original brewer was so inconsistant that most can's had a different alcohol content, depending on the batch!
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Old 04-11-2007, 11:08   #21
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I'm not moving to Texas. I don't want to get shot!
After making such idiotic statements, I'd suggest that you maintain the above-mentioned resolve to not move (or even GO) to Texas.
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Old 04-11-2007, 11:15   #22
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I like to tell people I'm from Texas,
I think I'd make a good Texan.
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Old 04-11-2007, 11:20   #23
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Originally posted by Lykoi
You are required to try ranch dressing on everything, even if you hate it the first time... you still have to try it.
And jalapeños...everything has to have jalapeños on it. In fact...you can get deep fried jalapeños, stuffed with cheese and dipped in ranch...God Bless Texas!

Seriously, though, I really do miss TX.

The Confederate flag was mentioned earlier....I'd estimate I'd see 10 times more of them in the Carolinas, GA, AL, and northern Florida than I ever saw in TX.

Oh...and Carlona BBQ SUCKS! Vinegar has no place on a BBQ table!
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Old 04-11-2007, 11:33   #24
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Oh...one other thing...

I REALLY miss the carry laws in TX compared to what I have to deal with now...not to mention the number of places here that like to post no CW signs.

BUT...I remember the "Criminal Mischeif" portion of the law seemed a bit odd to me when I took the course.

Basically, if someone is committing "Criminal Mischief" after dark...deadly force is fair game:

http://tlo2.tlc.state.tx.us/statutes....000009.00.htm

Definition of Criminal Mischief:
<I>
§28.03. Criminal mischief.

(a) A person commits an offense if, without the effective consent of the owner:

(1) he intentionally or knowingly damages or destroys the tangible property of the owner;

(2) he intentionally or knowingly tampers with the tangible property of the owner and causes pecuniary loss or substantial inconvenience to the owner or a third person; or

(3) he intentionally or knowingly makes markings, including inscriptions, slogans, drawings, or paintings, on the tangible property of the owner.</I>

http://www.texaspolicecentral.com/ti...nst%20Property

So...
DON'T go spraypainting someone's property after dark!!!
DON'T go knocking over mailboxes!!!
DON'T go TP someone's house!!!

DON'T mess with Texas!!!

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Old 04-11-2007, 11:57   #25
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Re: Re: Re: I'm Upset Boys--Even a Touch Offended

Quote:
Originally posted by Andrewsky
But I do hear that everyone there has a 4x4 with a confederate flag on the backlight.
What does a confederate flag have to do with Texas?
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