A first-grade teacher, Ms Brooks was having trouble with one of her students.
The teacher asked, "Harry what is your problem?" Harry answered, "I'm too
smart for the first-grade. My sister is in the third -grade and I'm smarter than
she is! I think I should be in the third-grade too!"
Ms Brooks had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office. While Harry
waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the
The principal told Ms Brooks he would give the boy a test and if he failed to
answer any of his questions he was to go back to the first-grade and behave.
Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed
to take the test.
Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
And so it went with every question the principal thought a third-grade should
The principal looks at Ms Brooks and tells her, "I think Harry can go to the
Ms Brooks says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions?" The
principal and Harry both agree.
Ms Brooks asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?
"Harry, after a moment "Legs."
Ms Brooks: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?"
Ms Brooks: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?"
Ms Brooks: What's a start with a C and ends with a T is hairy, oval, and
delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?
Ms Brooks: What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?
The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer,
Harry was taking charge.
Ms Brooks: What does a man do standing up, a woman do sitting down and a dog
do on three legs?
The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer.
Harry: Shake hands
Ms Brooks: Now I will ask some "Who am I" sort of questions, okay?
Ms Brooks: You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up. I get
wet before you do.
Ms Brooks: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The best
man always has me first.
The Principal was looking restless and a bit tense.
Harry: Wedding Ring
Ms Brooks: I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you blow
me, you feel good.
Ms Brooks: I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver.
Ms Brooks: What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of
heat and excitement?
Harry: Fire truck
The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put Harry in
the fifth-grade, I got the last ten questions wrong myself."
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