GlockTalk.com
Home Forums Classifieds Blogs Today's Posts Search Social Groups



  
SIGN-UP
Notices

Glock Talk
Welcome To The Glock Talk Forums.

 
  
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 03-31-2008, 01:47   #1
okie
GT Mayor
 
okie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: Muskogee Ok.
Posts: 129,520


Ten Things You'd Never Hear A Redneck Say

1. I thought Grace land was tacky.
2. No kids in the back of the pick-up, it's not safe.
3. Do you think my hair is too big?
4. Honey, did you mail that donation to Green peace?
5. The tires on that truck are too big.
6. I've got it all on a floppy disk.
7. Do you think this ball cap goes with this shirt?
8. Damned if that politician isnít honest!
9. We're vegetarians. I'll have grapefruit instead of biscuits and gravy.
10. You can't feed that to the dog.
__________________
Don't dial 911, dial 1911
If you don't stand behind our troops, PLEASE feel free to stand in front of them!
Schiit audio, everything else ain't.
okie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-31-2008, 03:11   #2
Blitzer
Cool Cat
 
Blitzer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: The communist's play ground of OHIO
Posts: 26,617
Send a message via AIM to Blitzer Send a message via Yahoo to Blitzer
40 things you will never hear a Red neck say.

40. Oh I just couldn't, she's only sixteen.
39. I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex.
38. Duct tape won't fix that.
37. Honey, I think we should sell the pickup and buy a family sedan.
36. Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken.
35. We don't keep firearms in this house.
34. Has anybody seen the sideburns trimmer?
33. You can't feed that to the dog.
32. I thought Graceland was tacky.
31. No kids in the back of the pickup, it's just not safe.
30. Wrestling's fake.
29. Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace?
28. We're vegetarians.
27. Do you think my gut is too big?
26. I'll have grapefruit and grapes instead of biscuits and gravy.
25. Honey, we don't need another dog.
24. Who cares who won the Civil War?
23. Give me the small bag of pork rinds.
22. Too many deer heads detract from the decor.
21. Spitting is such a nasty habit.
20. I just couldn't find a thing at Walmart today.
19. Trim the fat off that steak.
18. Cappuccino tastes better than espresso.
17. The tires on that truck are too big.
16. I'll have the arugula and radicchio salad.
15. I've got it all on the C drive.
14. Unsweetened tea tastes better.
13. Would you like your fish poached or broiled?
12. My fiance, Bobbie Jo, is registered at Tiffany's.
11. I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.
10. Little Debbie snack cakes have too many fat grams.
9. Checkmate.
8. She's too young to be wearing a bikini.
7. Does the salad bar have bean sprouts?
6. Hey, here's an episode of "Hee Haw" that we haven't seen.
5. I don't have a favorite college team.
4. Be sure to bring my salad dressing on the side.
3. You All.
2. Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Darlin'.
1. Nope, no more for me. I'm drivin’ tonight.
<o:p> </o:p>
__________________
It doesn't matter what the Joe on the street thinks, it is who pays the biggest bribes to the electoral college gets elected as President! :crying:
Blitzer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-31-2008, 03:14   #3
Blitzer
Cool Cat
 
Blitzer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: The communist's play ground of OHIO
Posts: 26,617
Send a message via AIM to Blitzer Send a message via Yahoo to Blitzer
25 Ways to Tell You're from NW Pennsylvania

25 Ways to Tell You're from NW Pennsylvania

1. You've never met any celebrities 2. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway
3. "Vacation" means driving through Cook's Forest or going to Waldameer
4. You've seen all the biggest bands ten years after they were popular.
5. You measure distance in minutes
6. Down south to you means West Virginia
7. You know several people who have hit a deer
8. You have no problem spelling or pronouncing "Presque Isle"
9. Your school classes were cancelled because of cold
10. You've ridden the school bus for an hour each way
11. You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day
12. You think ethanol makes your truck "run a lot better."
13. You know what's knee-high by the Fourth of July
14. You see people wear bib overalls at funerals.
15. You see a car running in the parking lot at the store with no one in it no matter what time of the year.
16. You end your sentences with an unnecessary preposition. Example: "Where's my coat at?" or "If you go to the mall I wanna go with."
17. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, or grain De-tassling was your first job
18. Your idea of a really great tenderloin is when the meat is twice as big as the bun and accompanied only by ketchup and a dill pickle slice
19. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked
20. You think of the major four food groups as beef, pork, beer, and Jell-O salad with marshmallows
21. When asked how your trip was to any foreign, exotic place, you say,"It was different."
22. You consider being called a "Pork Queen" an honor
23. You carry jumper cables in your car
24. You drink "pop"
25. You know what "cow tipping" is
__________________
It doesn't matter what the Joe on the street thinks, it is who pays the biggest bribes to the electoral college gets elected as President! :crying:
Blitzer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-31-2008, 03:17   #4
Blitzer
Cool Cat
 
Blitzer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: The communist's play ground of OHIO
Posts: 26,617
Send a message via AIM to Blitzer Send a message via Yahoo to Blitzer
10 Ways to Tell You're in for a Bad Day

10 Ways to Tell You're in for a Bad Day

You Know You're in for a Bad Day When...
1) You wake up - face down on the pavement.
2) You call Suicide Prevention and they put you on hold.
3) You see a "60 minutes" news team waiting for you in your office.
4) Your twin sister forgets your birthday.
5) You wake up and discover your waterbed broke and then you realize you don't have a waterbed.
6) Your car horn goes off accidentally and remains stuck as you follow a group of Hells Angels on the freeway.
7) Your boss tells you to not bother taking off your coat.
8) The bird singing outside your window is a buzzard.
9) You call your answering service and they tell you it's none of your business.
10) Your blind date turns out to be your ex-wife.
__________________
It doesn't matter what the Joe on the street thinks, it is who pays the biggest bribes to the electoral college gets elected as President! :crying:
Blitzer is offline   Reply With Quote

 
  
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump




All times are GMT -6. The time now is 16:27.




Homepage
FAQ
Forums
Calendar
Advertise
Gallery
GT Wiki
GT Blogs
Social Groups
Classifieds


Users Currently Online: 1,121
334 Members
787 Guests

Most users ever online: 2,672
Aug 11, 2014 at 2:31