GlockTalk.com
Home Forums Classifieds Blogs Today's Posts Search Social Groups



  
SIGN-UP
Notices

Glock Talk
Welcome To The Glock Talk Forums.
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 06-15-2002, 00:25   #1
Glockrunner
HOOYA DEEPSEA
 
Glockrunner's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: SC
Posts: 4,779
Send a message via Yahoo to Glockrunner
Redneck Engineering Exam

1. Calculate the smallest limb diameter on a persimmon tree that will support a 10 pound possum.

2. Which of the following cars will rust out the quickest when placed on blocks in your front yard?
A. 66 Ford Fairlane
B. 69 Chevrolet Chevelle
C. 64 Pontiac GTO

3. If your uncle builds a still that operates at a capacity of 20 gallons of shine per hour, how many car radiators are necessary to condense the product?

4. A pulpwood cutter has a chain saw that operates at 2700 rpm. The density of the pine trees in a plot to be harvested is 470 per acre. The plot is 2.3 acres in size. The average tree diameter is 14 inches. How many Budweiser Tallboys will it take to cut the trees?

5. If every old refrigerator in the state vented a charge of R-12 simultaneously, what would be the decrease in the ozone layer?

6. A front porch is constructed of 2x8 pine on 24-inch centers with a field rock foundation. The span is 8 feet and the porch length is 16 feet. The porch floor is 1 inch rough sawn pine. When the porch collapses, how many hound dogs will be killed?

7. A man owns a Tennessee house and 3.7 acres of land in a hollow with an average slope of 15%. The man has 5 children. Can each of the children place a mobile home on the man's land?

8. A 2-ton pulpwood truck is overloaded and proceeding 900 yards down a steep grade on a secondary road at 45 mph. The brakes fail. Given the average traffic loading of secondary roads, what are the chances that it will strike a vehicle that has a muffler?

9. A coal mine operates a NFPA Class 1, Division 2 Hazardous Area. The mine employs 120 miners per shift. A gas warning is issued at the beginning of 3rd shift. How many cartons of unfiltered Camels will be smoked during the shift?

10. At a reduction in gene pool variability rate of 7.5% per generation, how long will it take a town that has been bypassed by the interstate to breed a country western singer?
Glockrunner is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-15-2002, 03:21   #2
Dogman
Getting Senior
 
Dogman's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2000
Location: OH
Posts: 2,325
Errrr... ummm... Hey Billy Bob, what in tarnation is a "exam"?
__________________
"To announce that there must be no criticism of the President, or that we are to stand by the President, right or wrong, is not only unpatriotic and servile, but is morally treasonable to the American public." - Theodore Roosevelt
Dogman is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-15-2002, 10:53   #3
carebear
Da Bear is back
 
carebear's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Anchorage, AK
Posts: 2,016


that's what them what caint spell "trans" call them Pontiacs.
__________________
Here's how it works on a public forum: FIRST, you say something that establishes you as someone to be taken seriously. THEN, we'll spend time trying to extract what you might mean, if we think it's worth it.
So far, it doesn't look promising. - dgg9

1911 Club member #0321 (patent pending)
carebear is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-15-2002, 12:52   #4
Deathbunny
Mostly Harmless
 
Deathbunny's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Phoenix, Arizona
Posts: 42
Send a message via Yahoo to Deathbunny
But, what are the answers?
Deathbunny is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-15-2002, 23:36   #5
trcubed
Senior Member
 
trcubed's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Kuhnigitdale, NC
Posts: 1,720
I had an employee a few years back that took the test and came up with answers for each question. (I think it was the "Tennessee" Engineering Exam then.) The answers were more hilarious than the orignal questions, and, oddly, some even made sense!

Letsee...that stuff is buried amongst ten years of retained project records. If I can find it, I'll post it.

Terry Riley
trcubed is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-17-2002, 02:50   #6
SK
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 1999
Posts: 33
I submitted this quiz to the head of the engineering dept. at work. Here are his answers:

1.Diameter of limb is directly proportional to diameter of possum's tail.

2.Depends on if you're using wood blocks, concrete blocks, or hay bales.

3.A couple of 1960's vintage Winnebago radiators ought to do the job.

4.All I can say is - Mr. Busch better get to brewin'.

5.The impact would be a little less than if Aunt Bessie and Uncle Cecil vented simultaneously.

6.I reckon my coon dogs would be hurtin'.

7.I reckon if they hitch 'em all together in a big train hooked to the house there wouldn't be no problem.

8.What's a muffler?

9.Most of them ole boys are walking gas warnings anyway. Smoke 'em if you got 'em!

10.Wouldn't take long. They may not have all their fingers and toes, but that wouldn't stop 'em..
SK is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-20-2002, 02:57   #7
Public
Senior Member
 
Public's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Southwest USA
Posts: 434
Re-Intarnation - What happens to a redneck after all the beer is gone in heaven.
Public is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-21-2002, 12:28   #8
rednek30043
Senior Member
 
rednek30043's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Atlanta, Ga.
Posts: 498


my feelins is hurt, i failed this test in the 4th grade
rednek30043 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump




All times are GMT -6. The time now is 10:36.



Homepage
FAQ
Forums
Calendar
Advertise
Gallery
GT Wiki
GT Blogs
Social Groups
Classifieds


Users Currently Online: 1,266
362 Members
904 Guests

Most users ever online: 2,244
Nov 11, 2013 at 11:42